See, the thing here is...if you understand your issues so well, then why not set about fixing em? And so what if your Dad called the TV the idiot box, so did mine, shit, you're lucky, in front of my Dad you never even got to watch TV, it was a case of 'fuck off upstairs, im watching it' but so what man? You need to be resentful about that shit, i'm glad my Dad was hard on me, i like the person its made me, God knows what i would've turned out like if i had some soft as shite fuckin' Dad, don't let these things play on you man, it don't reflect on you, it's just maybe he was that kind of a guy, no ones perfect y'know, things happen but the past is the past, you draw a line under it, y'know? Your lucky, my Dad didn't get drunk and rip phones out of the wall but wind him up and he would give you a fuckin' thump round the head and no fuckin' mistake and hey, rightly so i think, otherwise i probably would've been a bigger piss taker than i am now.
Your situation is not unique and i don't mean to say that and take any kind of gravity away from it but...it's happened now man, it's done, there's people that have it a lot worse, trust me.
You seem to hold it against your Mum too, that she didn't do anything about your Dad fuckin' phones over and all that but what the fuck would you have her do? What, get in the way and get her face busted? Is it bad that she was at LEAST trying to keep you from risque shit on telly, why do you have to take that as some kind of moral inequity, perhaps it's not, perhaps it's a good lady trying to do her best in a complex situation i mean, she's human too y'know. It's one thing to have these kinds of feelings as a kid when you don't know any better but you're a fuckin' grown up man.
And however bad and evil and horrible your parents are you need to look one cold hard reality in the face. They gave birth to you, didn't they? They raised you, didn't they? They put food on your plate, didn't they? And, with all due respect, you're still living with them, aren't you? Do you not see something a bit crooked about that? If they were that bad and evil, why are you still with em, you're a grown man now, you can go out and get a job and live on your own and all of that stuff. I'm not having a go i'm just trying to illustrate how like, OK, you slag off your parents, they're bad, evil and rotten and everything...but you don't mind being kept by these bad rotten people?
I mean, they're older now, they looked after you your whole life and now they got you to where you are and are still like, keeping you in a manner of speaking, you, instead of contributing and paying them back for all the good stuffs they've done for you, you're busy holding grudges about not being allowed to watch Beavis and Butthead and maybe perhaps seeing your Dad trip a few times when he'd had a few too many.
Look at yourself too and what you're doing man, i don't think your parents can be that bad, to be keeping a perfectly grown man in their house like he was still a child and not telling you to like, fuck off and go get a job and live on your own y'know? And they'd be perfectly within their rights to do so i mean, they done their job right, they raised you into a grown man, it ain't like it's some kind of discarded latch key kid thing here, your way past the age where if your folks asked you to leave you'd be justified in saying y'know "alas, alack, poor me, left out in the cold when i was weak and vulnerable" you're a grown man and there's something that don't sit well with me about the concept of like, living in their house, eating their food, being in their house and using their electricity and internet connection to slag them off on a message board...while your Mum shouts from downstairs calling you for dinner as you type this shit.
Perhaps it's just where i come from, a cultural thing or whatever but...to be honest, on the balance of things, weighing up, and obviously not knowing you personally, i'd say the good your parents done for you and are still doing for you far outweighs a lot of these childish issues you have about your old man being a bit rowdy when he's pissed and the things your mother did or did not want you to watch on TV.
Just let go of all that shit and look at yourself and assess yourself and see what you need to fix and go about fixing it, instead of assigning blame in your head for the reason things are the way they are, it's just a pointless exercise i mean, look, hypothetically, OK, lets just fast forward to a blame assigners conclusion, lets say, for arguments sake, everything, all of it, every little stick of issue you got, it's all your old mans fault. OK, we agreed on that now, hypothetically? So...what now? What you gonna do? Cry? Bang your head against a wall? Have him killed? See what i mean, the shit goes nowhere, even when you reach a conclusion with this blame shit, the shit goes nowhere, better just draw a line under it and focus yourself on solutions instead of endlessly poring over issues again and again and again and again, it serves no purpose cept to drive yourself bananas, the older you get the less and less you have the right to hide behind "it's mummy n daddys fault!", all that stuff is a load of bollocks, you're alive now and you're a grown man and you're equipped to change your situation, from adulthood onwards, the buck stops with you.
And hey man, if you wanna try long hair knock yourself out although, if it were me and i were you, i probably wouldn't.
Edited by sugaraylen, 17 December 2012 - 11:37 AM.