Fitha_whiskey Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 On 10/16/2016 at 7:00 AM, Slash787 said: A teenage boy to his father: "Father, I am not a virgin anymore." Father: "Wow that's great. Come, let's sit down and drink something to celebrate this moment." Son: "Ok, I can drink with you but I really can't sit'' Another variation: Son: I had my first blowjob Dad: Let's celebrate with a drink Son: Yeah! I need to get the taste out of my mouth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PappyTron Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 Q - What's so great about having sex in the shower with a 10 year old girl? A - You can slick back her hair and pretend she's a 10 year old boy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Słash Posted October 24, 2016 Share Posted October 24, 2016 Two chemists walked into a bar... Chemist 1: I want a glass of H2O. Chemist 2: I want a glass of H2O too. Chemist 2: Died 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PappyTron Posted October 24, 2016 Share Posted October 24, 2016 4 hours ago, Slash787 said: Two chemists walked into a bar... Chemist 1: I want a glass of H2O. Chemist 2: I want a glass of H2O too. Chemist 2: Died That's heavy. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wasted Posted October 25, 2016 Share Posted October 25, 2016 What's the difference between an onion and a hooker? I don't cry when I'm chopping up a hooker. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gibson87 Posted October 25, 2016 Share Posted October 25, 2016 What does an out of business brothel say? Beat it. We're closed. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post PappyTron Posted October 25, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted October 25, 2016 A husband and wife are in bed one evening when he turns to her and says: "Hey, would you like to play the rape game?" "No, I would not!" "That's the spirit!" 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spunko12345 Posted October 25, 2016 Share Posted October 25, 2016 A blond answers the door to the milkman just after her husband leaves for work. Milkman says, "Good morning would you like it pasteurised" She says "No, just up to my tits will be fine" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gibson87 Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 A man walks up to a hooker and asks how much a hand job is. The hooker responds "$10. Would you like one?" The man replies "No. I just wanted to see how much I'd save by doing it myself" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fitha_whiskey Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 A redhead & a blond were talking. Redhead: "Last week I slept with a Brazilian" Blond: "You're such a slut! How many is a brazilian?" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 9 minutes ago, Snake-Pit said: Not really getting the idea of a joke are you Snakes? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 22 minutes ago, Dazey said: Not really getting the idea of a joke are you Snakes? I got one for you...what has SIX FUCKING LEGS and a big black cunt? On 25/10/2016 at 8:28 PM, spunko12345 said: A blond answers the door to the milkman just after her husband leaves for work. Milkman says, "Good morning would you like it pasteurised" She says "No, just up to my tits will be fine" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 (edited) 9 minutes ago, Len Cnut said: I got one for you...what has SIX FUCKING LEGS and a big black cunt? The A Team! @Len Cnut What do you call a dog with a spade up its arse? Edited October 27, 2016 by Dazey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 25 minutes ago, Dazey said: The A Team! @Len Cnut What do you call a dog with a spade up its arse? No, go on Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 18 minutes ago, Len Cnut said: No, go on Dawn French circa 1995! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 I had heard that one before actually! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Just now, Len Cnut said: I had heard that one before actually! Boooo! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gibson87 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 A guy in a wheelchair ran over my foot today "You better watch where you're going next time." I told him He said "I'm handicapped, you can't do anything." I said "No, you're handicapped, you can't do anything." 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spunko12345 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Here's a nice topical one What have Don King and Michael Barrymore got in common? Both can get you a good fisting in the ring. Why can't Maddie McCann play Xbox? Because I've got a Playstation. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Słash Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 3 minutes ago, Gibson_Guy87 said: A guy in a wheelchair ran over my foot today "You better watch where you're going next time." I told him He said "I'm handicapped, you can't do anything." I said "No, you're handicapped, you can't do anything." Fuck..... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spunko12345 Posted October 28, 2016 Share Posted October 28, 2016 A bloke walks into a bar and sits next to an attractive girl, whispers in her ear "your definately getting laid tonight baby" She looks at him and smiles "your confident, are you psychic" He replies "no, I'm just much stronger than you" 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cantona Posted October 31, 2016 Share Posted October 31, 2016 (edited) What do Maddie McCann and her jokes have in common? Spoiler They don't get old. Edited October 31, 2016 by AslatIE 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AxlsFavoriteRose Posted October 31, 2016 Share Posted October 31, 2016 13 minutes ago, AslatIE said: What do Maddie McCann and her jokes have in common? Hide contents They don't get old. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AxlsFavoriteRose Posted November 1, 2016 Share Posted November 1, 2016 On 4/21/2016 at 0:05 PM, AslatIE said: What's the difference between a loaf of bread and a jew? The bread doesn't scream in the oven. What's more disgusting than five babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to five trees. What's the toughest part of blending a vegetable? Making room for the wheelchair. you're so funny! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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