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Lets do another inappropriate jokes thread....


Towelie

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5 minutes ago, AslatIE said:

In the old days the Arabic muslims invented the condom, using a goat's lower intestine. The British refined the idea many years later by taking it out of the goat first.

Following on from this theme, man goes out to Arabia in the desert as a trader, he's living out there will all these bedouins and on the first day this Arab bloke is showing him around the tents and the bloke goes to him 'so what do you do for a shag out here?' and he goes, well, it goes get kinda rough so for those occasions, when you really can't bear it we have this camel.  So anyway a couple of weeks pass and the guy ain't had none in ages and he wakes up one night with the ol' blue balls, pops outside, can't hack it anymore and goes fuck it and starts doing this camel, laying into it, gettin' all those weeks of sexual frustration out suddenly the lantern lights come on and the Arabs see him there aghast.  They go 'what the fuck are you doing?' and he goes 'well you did say that this is how you dealt with your urges!' and he's goes 'nah mate, i meant you ride the camel into town and sort yourself out a brass'

:lol:

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35 minutes ago, Len Cnut said:

Following on from this theme, man goes out to Arabia in the desert as a trader, he's living out there will all these bedouins and on the first day this Arab bloke is showing him around the tents and the bloke goes to him 'so what do you do for a shag out here?' and he goes, well, it goes get kinda rough so for those occasions, when you really can't bear it we have this camel.  So anyway a couple of weeks pass and the guy ain't had none in ages and he wakes up one night with the ol' blue balls, pops outside, can't hack it anymore and goes fuck it and starts doing this camel, laying into it, gettin' all those weeks of sexual frustration out suddenly the lantern lights come on and the Arabs see him there aghast.  They go 'what the fuck are you doing?' and he goes 'well you did say that this is how you dealt with your urges!' and he's goes 'nah mate, i meant you ride the camel into town and sort yourself out a brass'

:lol:

That was you when you went off the grid a few weeks ago weren't it? Go on! Admit it! :lol:

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1 hour ago, Len Cnut said:

Following on from this theme, man goes out to Arabia in the desert as a trader, he's living out there will all these bedouins and on the first day this Arab bloke is showing him around the tents and the bloke goes to him 'so what do you do for a shag out here?' and he goes, well, it goes get kinda rough so for those occasions, when you really can't bear it we have this camel.  So anyway a couple of weeks pass and the guy ain't had none in ages and he wakes up one night with the ol' blue balls, pops outside, can't hack it anymore and goes fuck it and starts doing this camel, laying into it, gettin' all those weeks of sexual frustration out suddenly the lantern lights come on and the Arabs see him there aghast.  They go 'what the fuck are you doing?' and he goes 'well you did say that this is how you dealt with your urges!' and he's goes 'nah mate, i meant you ride the camel into town and sort yourself out a brass'

:lol:

I swear I've heard a much longer and slightly different version of this joke involving Sámis and reindeer :lol: 

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...
On April 21, 2017 at 11:00 AM, AslatIE said:

I asked a Chinese girl for her number once, then she turned to me and said ''Sex, sex, sex! Free sex tonight!''. I was shocked, but my friend told me ''Relax, she means 666-3629''.

What did God say when he made the first black man? ''Oh crap, I burnt one''

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come home from camp.

What do Nike and the KKK have in common? They make black people run fast.

Why do Mexicans eat beans for dinner? So they can take a bubble bath in the evening.

Why did Mr. Obama get two terms? Because black men always get a longer sentence.

Why can't Mexicans play Uno? They always steal the green card.

What do you call white people running down a hill?  An avalanche. 

What do you call Mexicans running down a hill? A mudslide.
 
What do you call black people running down a hill?  A jail break.

I'm going to hell :lol: 

 

Bravo, man. I just spilled my morning coffee because I was cryin' laughing. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

A guy walks in to the bedroom and sees his wife naked standing in front of a full length mirror. She says to him, honey I look so old fat and ugly, I sure could use a compliment from you. He says, your eyesight is damn near perfect.

 

A blonde is sitting in a boat in her front yard casting and reeling back in over and over again. Another blonde driving by stops and yells at her, you dumb bitch, people like you are what gives us blondes a bad name. Your lucky I can't swim or I would come out there and kick your ass.

 

2 coon hunters were walking back to the truck and when they arrived they found the dog sitting on the tailgate licking his dick and balls. One guy said MAN I wish I could do that! His buddy replied, you better not he might bite you!

 

Charlie Sheen can't wait to hit rock bottom. So he can smoke them all......dedicated to wasted.

 

Edited by gnfnrs1972
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