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GNR Women's Discussion - Part 2

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20 minutes ago, Tori72 said:

I go with the side that says forced help doesn't work and as, I think @MillionsOfSpiders described, has complex psychological structure running that might alienate the victim from her friends and allys.

I agree but we should be very careful with talking about women rejecting help or staying in abusive relationships because they want to, like it or love him too much.

There are stages to this problem. From the moment you fall in love with someone until you realize you are in a toxic relationship years can pass without reacting. And by the time you want to react it may be too late or too complicated to get out.

If people could only stop reflecting on this from the comfortability of their situations and put themselves in the shoes of victims for a second, all this unfair judgement could be used to provide some help.

I ask anyone here that they think for a minute if they had to leave their houses right now... how many of you are really able to do that? And im not talking about money or support from friends and family. Just think in which realistic amount of time any of you could make your bags and just leave.

Even more so, what if your abuser lives in YOUR OWN house. The one you bought with your money and everything inside belongs to you? I cant begin to list the things that could happen in that case too.

None of this is as simple as some people think and trying to blame the victim is just discouraging, frustrating and pretty much ignorant 100% of the time.

41 minutes ago, Tori72 said:

Also makes we wonder on how much he truly loved Erin and how much was something else

What do you mean by something else?

I dont know to which extent he really loved her. I think he did love her but in a sick way that was very unhealthy for both of them. 

From the letters she auctioned and other things i know, I think he was obsessed with her and he idealized her in some ways. She represented many things that were part of his imaginary at the moment.

He wanted complete domination of her person and total submission from her. It is just another example of this exercising of power he needed to do with a lot people and it probably stems from his own trauma of having no power at all over his father and stepfather when he was a child.

21 minutes ago, BlueJean Baby said:

Thank you @Tori72.  It was not easy telling that, I held it all inside for years and have finally gotten to the point where I can talk about it in the past few years. Luckily, I have to go to work shortly and hopefully, it will get my mind off it, last night was not very good for me. ?

I also have a story that is not so bad as yours because I was able to walk away before it transformed into systematic abuse, but talking about it and going into details has always been very hard for me to the point that only a handful of people in my inner circle know about it and they knew only after everything ended.

Reading some of the opinions and statements made here has discouraged me to go more personal with my story so I understand that you have not felt well since last night. I am still upset and bothered by the lack of empathy of some people and the general level of ignorance that is shown, here and everywhere.

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49 minutes ago, SerenityScorp said:

How about tht story when a Woman have sex with Him by force N' He said sorry?

What about that what? It is horrible if its true! 

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34 minutes ago, Lumikki said:

Hah, so I'm not the only one who does shit like this. Not just about Axl, but sometimes I read books just to figure out what it was about that book that spoke to another person or why it touched them. Or to imagine how another person felt reading a particular book. I remember when I read Slash's book for the first time, I couldn't help but think about how Axl felt reading various parts of the book.

Lol, it seems...

When Im fascinated by people I try to know and learn as much as I can.

I am like that with many others too, for example, Franz Kafka. @Andy14 knows of my obsession and how I wish I could move back in time to live in Prague in 1915, under Kafka's bed.

If you could only see what my book Brief an den Vater looks like from all the conscious reading I've done of it, underlining sentences and adding anotations of my own at the margins :unsure:

Im fucked up. So was him.

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@Tori72 It wasn't me who made the comment about forced help in regard to DV. I would probably be more inclined to be on the other side of that fence, but I won't go there again :lol:

@Lumikki I wondered why I couldn't find a mygnr version of the interview, if newgnr had it you could be sure mygnr would too due to the amount of people who posted on both boards.. and the rivalry between them :lol: 

I wonder who it was that demanded the pictures be removed, TB? I don't think it was Axl himself because they say 'someone posing as Rose' so that makes me think it was TB trying to make sure he doesn't see it or people straight out dismiss what she says. I did think a lot about posting it partly because of the pregnancy part, maybe he doesn't know about it still because he's been "blocked" from seeing it. And I know that sounds ridiculous but then I think about other things TB have "shielded" him from and I wonder. 

Edited by MillionsOfSpiders
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1 hour ago, killuridols said:

Lol, it seems...

When Im fascinated by people I try to know and learn as much as I can.

I am like that with many others too, for example, Franz Kafka. @Andy14 knows of my obsession and how I wish I could move back in time to live in Prague in 1915, under Kafka's bed.

If you could only see what my book Brief an den Vater looks like from all the conscious reading I've done of it, underlining sentences and adding anotations of my own at the margins :unsure:

Im fucked up. So was him.

@Lumikki Lol, I also do it. I like when a friend recommends me a book to read, since it gives me an opportunity to find out more about the person and figure out what might have led them to read the particular book.

@killuridols Hope you're reading your Kafka in German :devilshades:

You definitely need to come to Prague to see "his" places, like his birthplace house:

001_Rodny_dum_Franze_Kafky_jpg_800x800_q85.jpg

Or this tiny house Nr. 22 where he once lived:

5RLQYJ17IF9478UWV5YO5890YT9U0810.jpg

Or this famous café known as a place for writers and poets to meet and discuss their ideas:

Související obrázek

 

Sorry for off topic....now back to what's important:

23 hours ago, Frey said:

Lit. It's lit. At least learn the lingo if you want to join me and Melizzzzzy :max:

:bitchfight::max:

 

:rofl-lol:

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1 hour ago, MillionsOfSpiders said:

I wonder who it was that demanded the pictures be removed, TB? I don't think it was Axl himself because they say 'someone posing as Rose' so that makes me think it was TB trying to make sure he doesn't see it or people straight out dismiss what she says. I did think a lot about posting it partly because of the pregnancy part, maybe he doesn't know about it still because he's been "blocked" from seeing it. And I know that sounds ridiculous but then I think about other things TB have "shielded" him from and I wonder. 

From what I understood, they said that order came when the interview was "arming", lol, sounds like a really bad translation from Spanish but it makes me think how would anyone know an unknown Argentinian website was going to interview this woman? :shrugs:

I smell a little bullshit there... But anyway, the pregnancy story is what sounds more fishy to me of all the things she said. That is a pretty delicate thing to be talking about so lightly, to put herself under the risk of being called by lawyers and what not.  By the end of the interview I think she says she wants to enter in contact with Axl, but I really don't know what for.

It will sound crazy but if TB blocked Axl from learning about this BS, I'm glad they did. There's no point in him knowing, especially since there is no evidence or way to know that was really HIS baby. What could he possibly say or do about it?

And last but not least, this woman has changed her last name now. I was handled her FB profile last year and I have checked again after you contacted me. It seems to me she has a new partner and that she uses her new partner's last name. There are no references to GN'R or Axl in her profile but she does have among her contacts all the strippers from that era: Pamela, Barbi, Adriana.... plus, the good ol' Dougie Goldstein :facepalm:

 

1 hour ago, Andy14 said:

Hope you're reading your Kafka in German :devilshades:

You definitely need to come to Prague to see "his" places, like his birthplace house:

001_Rodny_dum_Franze_Kafky_jpg_800x800_q85.jpg

Or this tiny house Nr. 22 where he once lived:

5RLQYJ17IF9478UWV5YO5890YT9U0810.jpg

That comment about reading German is a stab in the middle of my heart and you know it :unsure:

His childhood and his relationship with his father was pretty much Axl-esque. I want to set foot in all those places and live in the tiny pink house you've shown me. 

Edited by killuridols

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2 hours ago, Tori72 said:

@BlueJean Baby thank you for sharing your story here. So very heartbreaking. Just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry you and your son had to go through this hell and still do to some part. Can't believe how much he was able to get away with the shit he'd done. Wish you all the best! :hug:

And yeah, I gotta go back to where the discussion about domestic violence kind of stopped. What has been done in the latest post by Alja was classic derailing and I wanna point it out because it is often experienced in discussions about violence towards women. The aim of derailing is to bring the subject of discussion to something else. The subject was domestic violence towards women and how important it is to understand that the one who abuses has the responsibility and never ever the victim. To go and say, "yeah, but also men are victims of dv and elder people" etc. True, they are. But only to an incredibly smaller amount. There are statistics about those things. It is simply like: "apples are green". - "Yeah, but also grass is green". Right, but we were talking about apples. Whatever is going on with grass has nothing to do with apples.

Whatever happens to some men or elders has nothing to do with dv towards women and the fact that a victim is never responsible. 

On how to help victims, I learned that you cannot force anyone to stop a relationship and seek help. You can only offer to be there, to listen and sensitivly tell her that she does not deserve to live like this, that she does not deserve to be treated like this. That there is professional help out there. We had this discussion also about how to help Axl, whether now or in the past. Opinions vary here. I go with the side that says forced help doesn't work and as, I think @MillionsOfSpiders described, has complex psychological structure running that might alienate the victim from her friends and allys.

The red flag for me is that auction material everytime I see it, it just makes me to ask again and again: "Who is that person who is capable to put that much intimate stuff of someone alive to auction?!" Axl`s outburst-guilt circle is typical for violent persona. Saying that he never tend to behave violently is ridiculous. If I hear hoofbeats, I tend to look, if there`s any zebras when everyone assumes just horses. You know, statistically, in most of the world it will be horses. That`s it. Other thing is that it`s very difficult to make statistic of these problems. Even if something happens in less cases or is not immediately visible, does not mean that it does not exist or shouldn`t get awareness. Also abusive relationship can be much more complex than abusive man and victim woman.

Maybe because I have many good friends among men I see how abusive can women be and that the way they do it is much more silent and sophisticated and often goes unrecognized. I know both men and women who maintain abusive relationship despite everything. Relationships where both are abusive, each one his/her own way. I`ve seen relationship going rollercoaster from outburst and hating each other`s guts to peacemaking sex (both sides claiming best to have) for pretty long time.

Stories of people we never met (the more famous, the more it is) is always tinged and aromatized with lots of artificial additives and stabilizers (to sound interesting and to get its fifteen minutes of fame). The story does have some missing and unfitting puzzles for me. I don`t think that I`ll ever get it, it`s a puzzle, not something affecting my life. It happened in past, all we can do with past stories is to recognize paths and choose, if we want to go that path (again) or not.

One "zebra" puzzle is for example that he was actively searching for help with his issues.

I agree with that last paragraph, I just wouldn`t be so sure about gender assumed. 

2 hours ago, Lumikki said:

Not gonna lie, reading these bits like "I feel like maybe someone can finally help and understand me– I don’t feel so alone" and also the bit about him "trying hard" is kind of heart-breaking to me. Because I do believe he was trying very hard to deal with whatever he was struggling with and the way he tries to find answers in whatever book he was reading is so bittersweet.

I can just picture Axl in a hotel room in rainy Hamburg, studying his book in search of answers and trying to be quiet so as not to wake Izzy...

And that other quote  -"Thank you for coming back and also for holding me, that is one of the most important and special moments of my life."- dysfunctional relationship indeed. But also sad because Axl being so amazed and appreciative about Erin holding him probably implies he didn't get held a whole lot in his life :unsure::unsure:

As for Erin, I feel for her so much. Some of the stuff she has said, like the quote above about her wanting to make it all better for Axl, or how she's a care taker and just wanted a normal life with a station wagon and bunch of children, etc... Well, I'm kinda similar in that regard, with the same life goals and instincts*, so part of me can identify with that a whole lot and blargh... I'm honest enough with myself to admit that I might have ended up in similar ways to her, if I had been in her position and just as young and naive.

*I'm a "natural-born care taker" too, or so my aunt, who makes her living being a Yoda (TM), once told me :rolleyes: She took a look at my aura and my spiritual energy and then another quick look a the palms of my hands and bam! She knew all about me, despite the fact hat she hadn't seen me since I was 7 (so for more than 15 years by then). Gotta love Yoda types :facepalm::awesomeface:

Hah, so I'm not the only one who does shit like this. Not just about Axl, but sometimes I read books just to figure out what it was about that book that spoke to another person or why it touched them. Or to imagine how another person felt reading a particular book. I remember when I read Slash's book for the first time, I couldn't help but think about how Axl felt reading various parts of the book.

I somehow really like this and understand it. 

I went through this phase of self-searching, I was even reading this kind of literature, so I got some nostalgia when I saw the book. "I feel like maybe someone can finally help and understand me – I don’t feel so alone". As I said, I was lucky with soulmate. Doesn`t mean I didn`t went through serious phases of feeling lonely, different and misunderstood.

I make my living as a caregiver, it taught me for example how sensitive and appreciative are grown-up adults when you come and hold their hand when they are going through rough times. It`s really strong also for me. People are most frighten of being left alone. Caregiver types who don`t have built up coping mechanisms burn out easily. Also tend to end up in some care-giving - care-getting drama. It`s a kind of conviction that I deserve to be loved if I take care of someone. Next is expectation that if I give someone love and attention and be submissive towards that one, he/she will see how much I sacrifice and starts to fulfill my expectations or will change (and it never works, even more and more love and care is poured. For the other one by some time it can be restraining and suffocating amount of love and care). Lots of these caretaker types work as healthcare staff and yes, they are mostly women. Many of them do have this kind of home drama (violence intensity varies). The most vulnerable usually come from dysfunctional families with dependence issues. 

Caretaking is also my vulnerable spot.

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A caretaker who believes in the responsibiity of a victim and tries to derail issues with all sorts of measures only to not get to the bottom of violence-related problems. I would'nt wish that to my worst enemy. :facepalm:

I do give you the benefit of doubt though, maybe this is just all due to translation. 

3 hours ago, Lumikki said:

Not gonna lie, reading these bits like "I feel like maybe someone can finally help and understand me– I don’t feel so alone" and also the bit about him "trying hard" is kind of heart-breaking to me. Because I do believe he was trying very hard to deal with whatever he was struggling with and the way he tries to find answers in whatever book he was reading is so bittersweet.

I can just picture Axl in a hotel room in rainy Hamburg, studying his book in search of answers and trying to be quiet so as not to wake Izzy...

And that other quote  -"Thank you for coming back and also for holding me, that is one of the most important and special moments of my life."- dysfunctional relationship indeed. But also sad because Axl being so amazed and appreciative about Erin holding him probably implies he didn't get held a whole lot in his life :unsure::unsure:

As for Erin, I feel for her so much. Some of the stuff she has said, like the quote above about her wanting to make it all better for Axl, or how she's a care taker and just wanted a normal life with a station wagon and bunch of children, etc... Well, I'm kinda similar in that regard, with the same life goals and instincts*, so part of me can identify with that a whole lot and blargh... I'm honest enough with myself to admit that I might have ended up in similar ways to her, if I had been in her position and just as young and naive.

*I'm a "natural-born care taker" too, or so my aunt, who makes her living being a Yoda (TM), once told me :rolleyes: She took a look at my aura and my spiritual energy and then another quick look a the palms of my hands and bam! She knew all about me, despite the fact hat she hadn't seen me since I was 7 (so for more than 15 years by then). Gotta love Yoda types :facepalm::awesomeface:

 

I feel you with all you're saying here. And I realize how ambiguous I am about Axl. But yeah, his struggle to find answers and break a cycle, to find this magic love and soulmate, it is heartwrenching.

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50 minutes ago, killuridols said:

That comment about reading German is a stab in the middle of my heart and you know it :unsure:

His childhood and his relationship with his father was pretty much Axl-esque. I want to set foot in all those places and live in the tiny pink house you've shown me. 

I only want you to get motivated to learn German 13065781_1578941119102349_1217286974_n.p

Spoiler

Your house is waiting for you :wub:

421063923_6083252365.jpg

novy-svet.jpg

But you need to bring your own door :smiley-confused2:

 

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8 minutes ago, Tori72 said:

A caretaker who believes in the responsibiity of a victim and tries to derail issues with all sorts of measures only to not get to the bottom of violence-related problems. I would'nt wish that to my wor

Maybe that's why she is caretaker and not a caregiver ;)

1 minute ago, Andy14 said:

I only want you to get motivated to learn German 13065781_1578941119102349_1217286974_n.p

  Hide contents

Your house is waiting for you :wub:

421063923_6083252365.jpg

novy-svet.jpg

But you need to bring your own door :smiley-confused2:

 

The only place where I can take German lessons here is expensive as fuck :cry:

LOL what happened to the door? I thought it was painted pink as well :facepalm:

 

I was born in a place I don't belong to, in a time and era that are not mine. Take me down to the paradise city where the houses are tiny and the roofs are red and I die of allergies :unsure:

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3 minutes ago, Tori72 said:

A caretaker who believes in the responsibiity of a victim and tries to derail issues with all sorts of measures only to not get to the bottom of violence-related problems. I would'nt wish that to my worst enemy. :facepalm:

I do give you the benefit of doubt though, maybe this is just all due to translation. 

You maybe just adapted killuridol`s strategy of making "Maybe" or "in some cases" absolute and only possibility. 

By the way I am still thinking that there must be some translate glitch in asying that there`s no possibility to be violent or abusive towards man and only woman is victim. I know cases where man is either sociopath unable to sympathy or some kind of pure asshole; but the thing which connects these violent abusive types is that they take themselves as the ones with no problem and no intention to do anything or change their behavior on their own. By the way they are usually violent towards anyone who is weaker or lower or anyhow defenseless (subordinated, service/retail people, children, animals...)

In a in a general discussion about domestic violence, have you ever heard about false or blown up accuse in domestic violence in case of getting profit? Most people would side the woman with no doubt. I hate no-doubt attitude in any case and I will try to debunk it because it`s how my mind works since ever.

Most probably you will make this also an absolute true, but if you meet many people with problems, you see that some of them are so got used to be victim that there is really nothing to do with it. They even involve whole community into their drama and drain energy and sources from everyone who decides to pour love and attention on that poor soul. It`s more comfortable for them to stay than to break the cycle. I had this in near family for approximately 20 years. 

You know, life is not black and white, that`s all. Life is ambiguous or greyish most of the time.

8 minutes ago, killuridols said:

Maybe that's why she is caretaker and not a caregiver ;)

 

I`ll take care of people if needed; I just used Lumikki`s word and autocorrect liked it more, it`s that simple.

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Off topic here

 

Does Anyone in here have a case of "Facebook suspicious activity" N' "You have to upload photo of Yourself that show Your face clearly,  dont worry We gonna erase the photo on database"

Ive tried to log in My fb without have to upload the photo but I cant,  So eventho I dont want to but I have to upload My photo N'now I can log in again, but now Im worried if its hacker trying to get My data :unsure:

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8 minutes ago, Alja said:

You maybe just adapted killuridol`s strategy of making "Maybe" or "in some cases" absolute and only possibility. 

The domestic abuse towards women is a worldwide problem only stubborn arrogants like yourself want to deny and bring up exceptions or other types of violence just to piss all over it, for I don't know which fucked up reasons you may have to be against it.

We have not talked here about the "abuse" of men because it simply does not outstand in statistics. If you are so inclined to defend this side of the story, then bring some quality studies to the table. Show your numbers and your research on the subject, instead of just posting your ignorant views on the matter.

I really doubt you will come back with anything significant but I will give you the chance to fight for it. All I ask is that you do it with the seriousness it requires.

Go ahead and show everybody in this thread that domestic abuse towards men is a problematic that is causing men to live like hostages at their own homes, that they have to wear make up to cover their bruises and most importantly, that men are being killed by their spouses more times than men being killed randomly by another man.

25 minutes ago, Alja said:

In a in a general discussion about domestic violence, have you ever heard about false or blown up accuse in domestic violence in case of getting profit? Most people would side the woman with no doubt. I hate no-doubt attitude in any case and I will try to debunk it because it`s how my mind works since ever.

This is blatant bullshit and a new pathetic attempt from the patriarchy to try to shut up the victims.

Faking domestic violence is not that easy and a serious judge with experience in the subject will not buy stories that have no foundation. Hopefully, they will not be people like you or like those who think the victim is to blame for staying in the relationship.

So far, from all the opinions posted about this topic, it has been pretty easy for me to detect who has serious background knowledge on the subject and who doesn't. 

You come across as one of those who just repeats like a parrot the gossip she's heard in the block. Pretty far from actual and real first hand knowledge or serious research done on the subject matter.

37 minutes ago, Alja said:

I`ll take care of people if needed; I just used Lumikki`s word and autocorrect liked it more, it`s that simple.

This is not an autocorrect problem. Both words exist but they have different meanings.

I am pretty sure you are a caretaker and not a caregiver. One of those I wouldnt wish to my worst enemy, like @Tori72 said.

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9 hours ago, Alja said:

The red flag for me is that auction material everytime I see it, it just makes me to ask again and again: "Who is that person who is capable to put that much intimate stuff of someone alive to auction?!" Axl`s outburst-guilt circle is typical for violent persona. Saying that he never tend to behave violently is ridiculous. If I hear hoofbeats, I tend to look, if there`s any zebras when everyone assumes just horses. You know, statistically, in most of the world it will be horses. That`s it. Other thing is that it`s very difficult to make statistic of these problems. Even if something happens in less cases or is not immediately visible, does not mean that it does not exist or shouldn`t get awareness. Also abusive relationship can be much more complex than abusive man and victim woman.

...

Why do you act like selling some old crap is a giant sin and the reasons behind it have to be malicious or mean-spirited?!

Erin herself even said she didn't mean any harm by selling the old stuff off and that it was just part of her "letting go" process for her. Apart from that, we don't know the exact reasons for why she sold this stuff. Maybe she needed the money. Maybe she asked Axl if he wanted these things first and he didn't. Maybe she just wanted to get rid of all that stuff and didn't even bother to look too closely at it again before selling it off, therefore including some personal stuff she maybe should't have. Maybe it really was just a cathartic, healing thing for her, as she says. We don't know, but I do not see how any of this makes her a bad or abusive person, as you have implied in multiple posts now.

Also, no offense Alja, but you're only digging yourself into a deeper hole with all your posts. As other posters have pointed out, all you do is derail and go off on tangents that have nothing to do with the topic at hand. I can barely even follow what you're trying to say anymore.

 

 

@SerenityScorp Never had that problem, sorry.

 

 

Edited by Frey
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6 minutes ago, killuridols said:

:unsure:

Sorry, tried to be as tactful as I could, I honestly felt like letting a rant go that would have made Axl cringe. ?

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15 minutes ago, BlueJean Baby said:

Sorry, tried to be as tactful as I could, I honestly felt like letting a rant go that would have made Axl cringe. ?

Rant away! :headbang::anger:

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28 minutes ago, BlueJean Baby said:

Sorry, tried to be as tactful as I could, I honestly felt like letting a rant go that would have made Axl cringe. ? 

lol :lol: At least she didn't make you lose your humor...

On the other hand, I am here still shaking my head and sniffing like a little child :unsure:

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In a new attempt to open the eyes of the blinded, here's another video everybody should carefully watch and listen. From the perspective of a man:

"What about the boys who are profoundly affected in a negative way by what some adult man is doing against their mother, themselves, their sisters...? What about all those boys? What about those young men and boys who have been traumatized by an adult man's violence? You know what? The same system that produces men who abuse women, produces men who abuse other men. 

And if you wanna talk about male victims, let's talk about male victims! Most male victims of violence are the victims of other men's violence. So it is something that both men and women have in common, we are both victims of men's violence."

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6 hours ago, Frey said:

Why do you act like selling some old crap is a giant sin and the reasons behind it have to be malicious or mean-spirited?!

Erin herself even said she didn't mean any harm by selling the old stuff off and that it was just part of her "letting go" process for her. Apart from that, we don't know the exact reasons for why she sold this stuff. Maybe she needed the money. Maybe she asked Axl if he wanted these things first and he didn't. Maybe she just wanted to get rid of all that stuff and didn't even bother to look too closely at it again before seeling if off, therefore including some personal stuff she maybe should't have. Maybe it really was just a cathartic, healing thing for her, as she says. We don't know, but I do not see how any of this makes her a bad or abusive person, as you have implied in multiple posts now.

Yes, the auction seemed to be finally letting go of it all - plenty of people do that with stuff belonging to an ex. If she can make some money from it to help support herself and her kids, why not do that instead of just throwing it all into the garbage, right? And yeah, for all we know the stuff was in some box in an attic and it was just all shoved off to the auction house.

The only thing I thought should *not* have been included in the auction were the items pertaining to Axl's stepfather and siblings (the letter from the stepfather to all three kids that was very personal, and the childhood photos of the siblings). And that's simply because Axl's siblings are not celebrities, they're private citizens, and anything about their personal lives should have been left out. That particular letter from the stepfather should have been quietly discarded without being made public IMHO.

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18 hours ago, Blackstar said:

I don't disagree with all this. Not blaming the victim is a general principle in regards to DV, as much as in regards to rape. However, even in this issue, it's not all black and white and each DV case is different (although there are common patterns in the ways perpetrators act - e.g. blaming the victim for "provoking" the abuse) and I was talking about two particular cases I happen to know about.

Yes, in many DV cases (probably the vast majority of them) it's not a matter of strength and will for the reasons you presented. But when none of these obstacles (children, lack of resources and support, financial dependency, religious beliefs) is present, a question of choice and will might arise, especially if the monotonous answer after each DV incident is "yes, but I don't want to go to a psychologist - I love him and I can't live without him" (despite "if", this is not hypothetical).

I think that even in those cases, though, you're dealing with someone who has been conditioned/programmed to think that everything is fine, and thus it isn't just black and white in terms of choice. There are things like Stockholm Syndrome that come into play, and they often have become convinced that what the abuser says about them - that they deserve it, that there's no reason to go on without the abuser, etc. - is the absolute truth.

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On 4/27/2017 at 9:19 PM, killuridols said:

GN'R Official Facebook account posted this today:

A month left!

Who's going from here??

I know @Andy14, @Lumikki, @MillionsOfSpiders, @dgnr, @money honey, @giuls will......... :P

What about @Carlycosmos?? I havent heard from her in ages!!

 

You know it baby!! 25 DAYS!!!!

I've been missing this thread the past two weeks or so. Life is crazy atm. Constant thoughts about Slane on May 27th are making it very difficult to concentrate on real life stuff!!!

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5 hours ago, killuridols said:

In a new attempt to open the eyes of the blinded, here's another video everybody should carefully watch and listen. From the perspective of a man:

"What about the boys who are profoundly affected in a negative way by what some adult man is doing against their mother, themselves, their sisters...? What about all those boys? What about those young men and boys who have been traumatized by an adult man's violence? You know what? The same system that produces men who abuse women, produces men who abuse other men. 

And if you wanna talk about male victims, let's talk about male victims! Most male victims of violence are the victims of other men's violence. So it is something that both men and women have in common, we are both victims of men's violence."

Learning from Axl life story

 

 

Can We stop talking about this since it sensitive topic

Edited by SerenityScorp

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