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The Shittest Songs Ever


Len Cnut

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13 minutes ago, username said:

Honestly, it's not in my worst GnR songs top 3 I'd reckon. Yes it's messy and overproduced but I do like the vocals. It's not very good, certainly not when compared to the amazing original. But for me it's meh at worst. 

The thing is the original to me is like, a rare example of like a stone cold flawless fucking 500 million carat diamond of a song, you're never going to like...do it justice.  And especially not with what Guns did.  Whats brilliant about the song (among other things) is how spacey it is, and minimalist...the latin beat is kinda the making of the song.  They just sucked all the style and panache out of it and made it this meatheaded rock song with a corny overblown Axl vocal, its like they don't know whats good about the song and what to accentuate and capitalise on.  I mean Mick is the king of like...camp overblown vocals but he sort instinctively knew to play that one a bit straight, it makes it sort of...not creepier but...you can sing those lyrics with a sort of pantomime cynical evil voice, it makes it sound silly, The Stones one kind of draws itself into the old tradition of blues and the Devil and all that, the Guns one is dreadful in comparison.  And its one of those songs thats SOOOO big that you can't really escape comparison.

The only way to do songs like that is to do something DRASTICALLY different, that way you give the song a chance cuz people go 'oh well they're not TRYING to do the same thing', sort of like how Devo covered Satisfaction or Ray Charles did Yesterday.  But to take something like SFTD and make it into a straight rock song is so uninspired and disingenuous.  Especially the solo, which is Keiths hands is like...top 5 greatest solos in the world ever...and they make a fucking hash of it.

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1 hour ago, Len Cnut said:

The thing is the original to me is like, a rare example of like a stone cold flawless fucking 500 million carat diamond of a song, you're never going to like...do it justice.  And especially not with what Guns did.  Whats brilliant about the song (among other things) is how spacey it is, and minimalist...the latin beat is kinda the making of the song.  They just sucked all the style and panache out of it and made it this meatheaded rock song with a corny overblown Axl vocal, its like they don't know whats good about the song and what to accentuate and capitalise on.  I mean Mick is the king of like...camp overblown vocals but he sort instinctively knew to play that one a bit straight, it makes it sort of...not creepier but...you can sing those lyrics with a sort of pantomime cynical evil voice, it makes it sound silly, The Stones one kind of draws itself into the old tradition of blues and the Devil and all that, the Guns one is dreadful in comparison.  And its one of those songs thats SOOOO big that you can't really escape comparison.

The only way to do songs like that is to do something DRASTICALLY different, that way you give the song a chance cuz people go 'oh well they're not TRYING to do the same thing', sort of like how Devo covered Satisfaction or Ray Charles did Yesterday.  But to take something like SFTD and make it into a straight rock song is so uninspired and disingenuous.  Especially the solo, which is Keiths hands is like...top 5 greatest solos in the world ever...and they make a fucking hash of it.

I'm with you on everything you said. But it's still not in my worst GnR top 3.

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2 hours ago, Len Cnut said:

 

Be honest with yourself the song is fuckin' dreadful and everyone involved in its creation should take a long hard look at themselves.  Even Slash, the perrenial battered wife punching bag came out of the creation of  this abomination like 'nah, fuck this band!'. 

I actually like it :ph34r:

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Man, too many choices really.   But I will say this, sometimes it's difficult to separate a song from the video.  Someone mentioned Ratt earlier, they were an excellent band who made crap videos.  Does anyone remember Billy Squier?  His career was pretty much destroyed by the Rock Me Tonite video, eventhough the song wasn't that bad.

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11 hours ago, OmarBradley said:

What's wrong with this song? It's not amazing, but I don't think it qualifies for the thread title.

It’s awful crap rock and I think it is meant to be funny but it really isn’t. If you’re going to do a joke song at least be a bit amusing - like Used to Love Her is. 

I did get their first album and I only listened to it a couple of times. 

And their horrible cover Cats in the Cradle really sets my teeth on edge, it makes me cringe that some people think GNR did it :lol:

I should’ve posted that as well. 

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2 hours ago, MillionsOfSpiders said:

And their horrible cover Cats in the Cradle really sets my teeth on edge, it makes me cringe that some people think GNR did it :lol:

I remember it being one of the most common fakes on KaZaA! :lol: Along with steaming GnR classics such as Every Rose Has It's Thorn, White Christmas and Smells Like Teen Spirit. 

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On 3/2/2019 at 5:12 AM, Len Cnut said:

 

Be honest with yourself the song is fuckin' dreadful and everyone involved in its creation should take a long hard look at themselves.  Even Slash, the perrenial battered wife punching bag came out of the creation of  this abomination like 'nah, fuck this band!'. 

I used to think I liked this song. I randomly listened to it for the first time in years today and realized it's kinda shitty.

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13 minutes ago, luciusfunk said:

I used to think I liked this song. I randomly listened to it for the first time in years today and realized it's kinda shitty.

For a couple of weeks back there I thought I liked Rockin’ All Over the World by Status Quo...I’ve since sort of come back to my senses.

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On 3/5/2019 at 1:55 PM, Len Cnut said:

For a couple of weeks back there I thought I liked Rockin’ All Over the World by Status Quo...I’ve since sort of come back to my senses.

It’s better than Guns’ cover of Sympathy, though. 

On 3/5/2019 at 1:52 PM, soon said:

Haha, well... I figure anyone who thinks its awesome has perfected the dance moves?

No. Maybe I should work on that. 😄

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On 3/3/2019 at 5:46 PM, janrichmond said:

That Whitney fucking Houston song the bodyguard movie :facepalm: and the Titanic song from Silly Dion

Oh man i remember belting out I Will Always Love You in the back of my mothers car as a kid :lol:

It was out of character for me to do something like that - Whitney's vocal power possessed me :lol:

Edited by -W.A.R-
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17 hours ago, -W.A.R- said:

Oh man i remember belting out I Will Always Love You in the back of my mothers car as a kid :lol:

It was out of character for me to do something like that - Whitney's vocal power possessed me :lol:

As you were a child when you committed this offence...i will forgive you. However any repeats of such behaviour will result in an immediate ban followed by a kick in the 'nads :lol:

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This.

I was recently watching a video of top music videos with over 1 billion views on YouTube and I was appalled. How can it have 1.5 billion views is beyond me. Thriller has only a third of that. (Out of 50 or so songs that have hit the billion mark only a handful were pre-2010; this was one, another just like this, surprisingly November Rain, and maybe a few others I don't recall). Does this mean people are still listening to it? cause when it came out YT was just at its beginnings    

Edited by vikute91
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