Jump to content

NME: 18 Reasons Why Axl Rose Is The Biggest Douchebag In Rock


SMG

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 86
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Who cares, they are talking about Axl, any press is good for the upcoming tour dates. Various media outlets have always made up bullshit stories, just to give people the typical "Axl is crazy" line crap.

I used to care, but now I don't because at least people are talking and are interested in Axl and GN'R, negative or positive, who cares?... press is press. ;)

Edited by One.In.A.Million
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Another anti-Axl piece that makes no sense. They spend 17 bullet points bashing the guy (is there really a HUGE difference between "dreads" and "corn rows"? they used two different points for that?) But then of course, after mocking the guy, they beg him to get back with the old guys. You can't cuss and harass the guy and then get on your knees pleading with him for a reunion. I'll never understand this. All of these people bash Axl making fun of his hair, his weight, his clothes, his "plastic surgery", his weirdness, his tardiness, his disrespect for the fans, talking about how he can't sing anymore, but then they whine and cry because he won't go back to Slash. If you hate the guy that much, why???

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A few thots...

  • Tommy Hilfiger deserved to be walloped
  • The Bob Gucione Jr thing was hilarious
  • The Offspring are tools
  • The pigeons of shit metal thing was appropriate, especially given their music and that wannabe-celebrity jesse hughes
  • Fuck metallica and their stock riffs
  • Poodles do suck
  • The fan he kicked out was starting fights with other people in the crowd. It was the opposite of douchiness to kick him out
  • As for velvet revolver, slash ran his mouth too
  • Kurt wasn't progressive, he was a big rockstar frontman too, whether he admitted it or not
  • Tough shit as far as the old band goes

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It was a pathetic article. NME is terrible. Check out their list of top ten Album Closing Tracks. http://www.nme.com/blog/index.php?blog=1&title=listomania_the_10_best_closing_tracks&more=1&c=1&tb=1&pb=1

Oh my fucking god this explains it. NO MENTION OF Eclipse on DSOTM, what about Exo-genesis on TR? Oh my god this top is hilariously bad, this guy has absolutely no taste and is unworthy of writing in a rock magazine. Actually he's worthy of working for NME, those useless selllouts.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 Reasons Priya Elan is an Incompetent Dick Who Wrote a Shitty Article

You may know Priya Elan as the...well...you probably don't know him. That's about all the introduction he deserves.

18. His 'attitude'

Priya Elan has no dick. He's a pussy that would lose a fight to a softcover copy of Twilight. He has a whiny, wannabe sarcastic cool guy style that goes over about as well as hiring a Muhammad impersonator to do your bar mitzvah in the Gaza Strip. He bitches. That's all. Look at the list of things he's chosen to present Axl Rose as the biggest douchebag of them all: he's insulted other rock bands. He's insulted rock critics. He's dressed badly and worn his hair in unflattering styles. He's a womanizer! [sharp intake of breath!] Imagine the nerve of that, a rock star who sleeps around. He hates poodles? This is the shit that will keep me up at night.

17. He overuses the suffix -gate

Tommy Hilfiger-gate

Bob Guccione Jr.-gate

Metallica-gate

Velvet Revolver-gate

Nirvana-gate

Holy fuck, how about this one:

Prya Elan couldn't think of a real headline-gate.

16. He doesn't get rock

Priya Elan tries to convince you the that a guy is the poster boy for douchebags in rock by quoting him as saying "When the going get tough, the tough get an Uzi." Listen, space alien, here on Earth we have a concept called 'badass,' and generally idolize it in these people called 'rock stars.'

15. He's lazy as fuck

He tosses in about one sentence of elaboration for each entry and doesn't even get a picture for all of them. Those that do get a picture are mostly unrelated to the entry. The number of fucks Priya Elan did not give about this article could have reopulated Darfur, if only Priya Elan could do anything right.

14. His non-existent sense of humor

Setting aside his own boring attempts at witty commentary, Priya Elan apparently has a hard time understanding when someone else is joking. He interprets the statement "I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a Great White or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot," as being Axl's revelation of some seaweed phobia. He also takes "I don't even know my own phone number," at face value. He's either utterly humorless, dumb as fuck, or simply a liar, or some pitiful combination of the three.

13. He gets facts wrong

The "Pigeons of Shit Metal" were lambasted as such by Axl after getting a bad reception from the audience they opened for, not for showing up to rehearsal late. Priya Elan can't even take this entry seriously, as he acknowledges it as "a good insult, to be fair." His heart really wasn't into this at all. Later on, he refers to Duff as "guitarist." Are you fucking serious? Duff was around in the days where it was just five guys on stage, not eight, and yet Priya Elan is still too dumb to keep who played what straight.

12. He throws in red herrings

Priya Elan will give you a headline that makes you think he's on to one of the bigger stories, but will invariably describe some pissant non-event overshadowed by a better story. His "Metalica-gate" section covers a couple of jabs at each other in the media, ignoring the disastrous co-headlining tour where Axl ditched the show instead of filling in for Metallica when Hetfield was burned. He chooses one of the literally dozens of incidents where Axl told a fan to get the fuck out instead of, you know, that time he actually dived on a guy in the crowd filming the band to beat the shit out of him. He talks about Velvet Revolver insults and leaves out calling Slash a cancer. What the fuck? Priya Elan is gifted with an eye for the insignificant.

11. He repeats entries

Because once again, he's a lazy, incompetent moron who somehow cannot find enough reasons to fill out a list of douchey things Axl Rose has done. One entry on Axl's bad 2000s hairstyles is enough, Priya.

10. He doesn't know what a douchebag is

There's supposed to be some overall thesis to this article, right? These 18 entries should all come together to make the reader conclude Axl Rose is indeed the biggest douchebag in rock and roll. Maybe Priya should've reviewed a bit before submitting this piece and realised that what his list adds up to is a guy who freely insults other rock stars, has a few eccenctricities, and doesn't take shit from fans or Tommy Hilfiger. And of course, did not fuflill Priya Elan's personal dreams of showing up at the Hall of Fame and announcing a new album coming up with Slash and Izzy; this is the only reason the article was written; the rest is just half-assed bullshit tossed in. If he were making the case that Axl Rose was a douchebag based on other factors like his past abusive relationships with women, violent assaults on other people, showing up late, not going to his own rehearsals, storming off stage, etc, then you'd present an argument. But this is Priya Elan, and a troop of gorillas ejaculating onto an Etch-a-Sketch could create a more meaningful statement than him.

9. He has dumb sideburns

That just do not go well with his hair.

8. He makes Sarah Palin references

See #15.

7. He repeats entries

And it's just so fucking dumb.

6. He's

5. really

4. stretching

3. to find

2. entries, and it's sad

1. He misses big shit

Enough of the bullshit, this is the real issue. It's fucking pitiful that Priya Elan can set out to find 18 reasons why Axl Rose is the biggest douchebag in the rock world and he can't even come up with a decent list. He should have to be chopping off entries to make it fit, this is fucking Axl Rose, a guy who has throughout his lifetime:

- Triggered two riots by storming off stage

- Been taken to court for domestic abuse by two women who had relationships with him

- Physically assaulted people at his shows

- Physically assaulted people outside of his shows

- Routinely showed up late to concerts

- Fired managers and others left and right

- Called Slash a cancer

- Said Bon Jovi can suck his dick

- Wrote the lyrics to One in a Million

- Posted a foaming-at-the-mouth rant at someone who antagonized him on a GNR fan forum

- Not shown up at his own band's rehearsals

- Brought in his friend to record over Slash's guitar solo without telling anyone

Priya Elan has a fucking mountain of potential material to work with to create an entertaining and cohesive article, and yet somehow fails to do that and produces a half-assed piece of garbage, because he is an utterly incompetent and useless columnist.

Edited by Flayer
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I never bother to read these types of negative "issues" by different types of magazines., so I refused to read the 1st post of this thread also.

I refuse to fall into their "We dis-like Axl Rose but love the money his name makes us" crap.

Edited by deadpool89
Link to comment
Share on other sites

A few thots...

  • Tommy Hilfiger deserved to be walloped
  • The Bob Gucione Jr thing was hilarious
  • The Offspring are tools
  • The pigeons of shit metal thing was appropriate, especially given their music and that wannabe-celebrity jesse hughes
  • Fuck metallica and their stock riffs
  • Poodles do suck
  • The fan he kicked out was starting fights with other people in the crowd. It was the opposite of douchiness to kick him out
  • As for velvet revolver, slash ran his mouth too
  • Kurt wasn't progressive, he was a big rockstar frontman too, whether he admitted it or not
  • Tough shit as far as the old band goes

:thumbsup:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

By the way - here is the email of this incompetent prick: priya_elan@ipcmedia.com

Maybe someone could write him something nice...

Should send him an email with 18 reasons why he's a journalist.

Seriously though this pretty much sums up the attitude of the press towards Axl. It should've been fairly easy to have come up with 18 incidents where Axl doesn't come off looking the great- but half of them are slagging off his hairstyle and his strange phobias.

The guy had cornrows- what a douche

The guy dislikes poodles- mega douche

The guy is afraid of seaweed- ultimate douche

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 Reasons Priya Elan is an Incompetent Dick Who Wrote a Shitty Article

You may know Priya Elan as the...well...you probably don't know him. That's about all the introduction he deserves.

....

Hilarious. :rofl-lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

By the way - here is the email of this incompetent prick: priya_elan@ipcmedia.com

Maybe someone could write him something nice...

I sent him my own article :)

hahaha, dude, let us know if he replies anything.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.



×
×
  • Create New...