Bucketslash Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Sammy Hagar doesn't cook food, he screams at it until it burns from his intensitySammy Hagar's cars are all set to explode when they reach 55 mphBulls cower in fear of Sammy HagarSammy Hagar ALWAYS gets a virgin. ALWAYS.Sammy Hagar created the color red. He did this by making a color so white and bright that it burns into your brain and creates red in your mind.The devil challenged Sammy Hagar to a duel for a golden fiddle. Sammy won by punching him out during the devil's song.When Sammy Hagar gets naked, all non-virgins' eyes explode.Sammy Hagar drove around the world.Every time Sammy Hagar snores, a girl orgasms.When Sammy Hagar isn't drinking tequila, he's out slaughtering kittens until he finds something even more satisfying.Sammy Hagar doesn't jump, the entire planet shakes for him whenever he sings with van halen.David Lee Roth gets all the girls Sammy Hagar rejects.Most people have teddy bears. Sammy Hagar has a polar bear.Sammy Hagar is the fifth beatle.Highway to Hell is really about what happens to you when you don't obey Sammy Hagar.Sammy already knows why can't this be love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pain cake Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Sammy Hagar's a fag and I'd slap him if it wasn't for the fact he'd think I was coming onto him Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artfromtex Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Sammy's a cool guy. Even if you don't like his tunes, the guy is down to earth and not a brain-dead, drugged out idiot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JONEZY Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Sammy's cool! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zint Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 I have no probs with Sammy.Still love the Montrose album...that shit rocks.I just hope he's able to figure out when it's love when love comes walking in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bucketslash Posted August 16, 2007 Author Share Posted August 16, 2007 In fact he hasThe reason why Sammy Hagar wasn't on Van Halen 3 was because in the initial demos his singing was so extreme the Earth blew up. Sammy subsequently put it back together without anyone knowing.Sammy Hagar is the entire band of kiss. He plays all the instruments from behind the stage.Sammy Hagar knows just how deep the rabbitt hole goes.Sammy Hagar was fired from being in the matrix for being able to recreate all the special effects....with his intensity.Sammy Hagar isn't running with the devil:he's lapped the devil 5 times already.Sammy Hagar gave peace a chance.Eruption is really about the initial reaction to Eddie Van Halen thinking how good Van Halen would be with Sammy Hagar.Sammy Hagar is the man who sold the world. It has since gone platinum. Sammy Hagar has beaten freebird on extreme.That wasn't a powerdrill at the beginning of poundcake. It was really a more unrestrained version of Sammy Hagar's voice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tat2d1 Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Put that shit on a T Shirt and it'll sell. Mark my words. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bucketslash Posted August 16, 2007 Author Share Posted August 16, 2007 (edited) Sammy Hagar is Guns N' RosesThere is no party around when there is no Sammy Hagar around.In an attempt to end World War 2, the US dropped the atomic bomb on Japan twice. To combat this, the USSR made the nuclear missile. To combat this, the US created Sammy Hagar.When Sammy sleeps.....People Die.Sammy Hagar squeezes the charmin.Sammy hagar created both diet coke and mentos.Sammy Hagar knows why it ain't easy being green.Sammy Hagar is the cure to the Incredible Hulk.Sammy Hagar can get to world 8-4 and beat bowser. Without warp pipes.When Sammy Hagar plays donkey kong, donkey kong explodes and sammy hagar fucks a virgin. Edited August 16, 2007 by Bucketslash Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DirtyDeeds Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 Sammy Hagar throws a party... Diamond Dave IS the party.Sammy Hagar is a two-faced kiss-ass greedy bastard. He fit in perfectly with Van Halen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UYIllusion Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 I like his tequila Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tat2d1 Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 Sammy Hagar is a two-faced kiss-ass greedy bastard.Hell, that's about 90% of rock stars. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swlabr Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 Sammy Hagar's cars are all set to explode when they reach 55 mphThat one cracked me up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teroz Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 Sammy is a.k.a. Ronald McDonald Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ant Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 So get on your bad motor scooter and ride! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.