The Real McCoy's life issues and style advice thread

[Thin White Duke]

It's impossible to avoid certain kinds of people at work, in the grocery store, at the bank, etc ... when I say surround yourself, I meant in your personal life where you can decide with whom you spend your time.

Ah, there you go, when I say there will always be someone not happy for you I meant a wider circle. In a more strict circle then, of course, normally people will be happy for us.

There's ways to tell how someone feels about you without them laughing in your face or pointing a finger at you

It depends on the person, some are open books, but the best actors are not in Hollywood.

I have my fair share of trust issues, but generally I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and assume the best of them until they prove otherwise. If you look for the worst in people, you're more apt to find it.

Good for you. I'm also of the idea that the good prevails over the bad, even though shit happens.

[magisme]

I hope every one of you is miserable.

[Patience 4 Axl]

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

I find psychology fascinating to be honest, and I have great respect for the field in general. Some people genuinely need help and benefit from it. I took several courses in college and even thought about changing my major at one point. I do however feel like it's been increasingly abused, not just by psychiatrists / psychologists who are over-diagnosing and over-medicating at alarming rates, but by individuals themselves. People can type a few words into google, find a wiki article, and self diagnosis. I think that's dangerous, as if finding a label that comes close enough to describing their feelings or actions makes the behavior somehow more acceptable. The fact that other people may suffer from the same general type of symptoms doesn't make it better. The world is full of assholes.

[PappyTron]

There seems to be a lot of misunderstanding in this thread as to what schadenfreude and gluckschmerz are. Like anything else, the level of the emotion doesn't need to be extreme for it to be present. If your neighbour pulls up with his supermodel girlfriend in his brand new Ferrari and it makes you feel unhappy about being single and driving a 20 year old, clapped out banger, that is gluckschmerz. Likewise, if he tries to show off and crashes, the feeling that you get is schadenfreude. Neither of the two emotions need to be so strong as to define your life, even for a day, or even anything more than in passing.

[Ace Nova]

Where i come from they're called cunts.

Where I come from they're called humans. Do you actually believe that everybody saying "oh, I'm so glad for you" are really glad? How cute.

I think everyone is called a cunt where Len comes from

You start throwing that word around most American women, often enough, you'll get slapped before you get a chance to say it a second time.

(Don't ask me how I know that.... )

I love how everything needs a label. Everything. No one is a selfish cunt, noooo, they have the blah blah blah condition. I can't be happy for someone because I've been diagnosed with something, so you see, even though I recognize it's wrong for thinking this way, it's not actually my fault.

I love how everything needs a label. Everything. No one is a selfish cunt, noooo, they have the blah blah blah condition. I can't be happy for someone because I've been diagnosed with something, so you see, even though I recognize it's wrong for thinking this way, it's not actually my fault.

Gluckschmerz is german for selfish cunt, for your information.

Seriously, it's not that nothing can't be labelled, it's that humans acts have a logic and an expalnation too. If you want to label, let's label, I think you're just being a mixed between a smartass and a badass but coming from a blonde I love it.

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done.

Girl, you've been hanging around Len waaayyy too much.....

You would have had a meltdown a few years ago if guys here were throwing that word around like nothing. What has become of you?

I find psychology fascinating to be honest, and I have great respect for the field in general. Some people genuinely need help and benefit from it. I took several courses in college and even thought about changing my major at one point. I do however feel like it's been increasingly abused, not just by psychiatrists / psychologists who are over-diagnosing and over-medicating at alarming rates, but by individuals themselves. People can type a few words into google, find a wiki article, and self diagnosis. I think that's dangerous, as if finding a label that comes close enough to describing their feelings or actions makes the behavior somehow more acceptable. The fact that other people may suffer from the same general type of symptoms doesn't make it better. The world is full of assholes.

I think it has to do with soccer Moms watching a few episodes of Doctor Phil and thinking they are now the next Sigmund Freud.

[Guest Len B'stard]

You start throwing that word around most American women, often enough, you'll get slapped before you get a chance to say it a second time.

That doesn't make sense

[Ace Nova]

You start throwing that word around most American women, often enough, you'll get slapped before you get a chance to say it a second time.

That doesn't make sense

Why not? The wording?

[Guest Len B'stard]

If you say it often enough you'll get slapped before you say it a second time, surely if it requires doing often you'll get past the second time young man

[Ace Nova]

If you say it often enough you'll get slapped before you say it a second time, surely if it requires doing often you'll get past the second time young man

Doesn't mean you still won't say it.... ....especially you, out of all people.....heck, you'd say it on repeat probably.....

See...like this....

SLAP!....."Cunt"....SLAP!....."Cunt"....SLAP!...."Cunt"....

[Redhead74]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

[PappyTron]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

[Dazey]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

Do you not think that certain disorders are massively over diagnosed though?

[Redhead74]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

Give it a rest Pappy. I know you hate me but I have every right to express my opinion here as anyone else does.

I base my opinion on many people that I have personally witnessed, such as excusing bad behaviour of their children as ADHD when it's plain to see they're shit parents. And people who claim they suffer from anxiety and depression who do NOTHING to help themselves except pop pills which have significant side affects on themselves and those around them. Just to name two off the top of my head.

I didn't know that expressing an opinion on any given subject on a GNR forum required a qualification to do so.

[PappyTron]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

Do you not think that certain disorders are massively over diagnosed though?

That is a horrendously complicated question with a massive number of factors. Yes, many people are misdiagnosed, but in the past many people who had genuine issues were just told to "man up". Look at things like stress, PTSD, PMS, post-natal depression, or dozens of other things - people were just told to get on with it as it was "nonsense". The common culprits of misdiagnosis are things such as autism and ADD - things which are extremely difficult to correctly diagnose and are usually outside of the expertise of those such as GPs and social workers. Moreover, modern life has much more stimuli than yesteryear which in itself causes people to react very differently. Nevertheless, people who take the opinion that modern psychology is just a case of offering an opinion, clearly have no understanding of the field - it is most certainly done to a scientific standard on how it views and tests things.

[Dazey]

That is a horrendously complicated question with a massive number of factors. Yes, many people are misdiagnosed, but in the past many people who had genuine issues were just told to "man up". Look at things like stress, PTSD, PMS, post-natal depression, or dozens of other things - people were just told to get on with it as it was "nonsense". The common culprits of misdiagnosis are things such as autism and ADD - things which are extremely difficult to correctly diagnose and are usually outside of the expertise of those such as GPs and social workers. Moreover, modern life has much more stimuli than yesteryear which in itself causes people to react very differently. Nevertheless, people who take the opinion that modern psychology is just a case of offering an opinion, clearly have no understanding of the field - it is most certainly done to a scientific standard on how it views and tests things.

First of all I know absolutely bugger all about psychology and all that and admittedly I'm basing this on nothing more than a perception that ADD seems to have seen a massive increase in cases since I were a nipper. I mean I'm not saying (not qualified to say) that these things don't exist but I just think it does seem like a bit of a cop out in many cases. I've worked with kids in a number of cases in the past where I've been warned that they were trouble and in pretty much every case it was simply a case of trying to engage them rather than filling them full of meds.

[PappyTron]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

Give it a rest Pappy. I know you hate me but I have every right to express my opinion here as anyone else does.

I base my opinion on many people that I have personally witnessed, such as excusing bad behaviour of their children as ADHD when it's plain to see they're shit parents. And people who claim they suffer from anxiety and depression who do NOTHING to help themselves except pop pills which have significant side affects on themselves and those around them. Just to name two off the top of my head.

I didn't know that expressing an opinion on any given subject on a GNR forum required a qualification to do so.

Has nothing to do with whether I like you or dislike you - it has everything to do with whether you are correct or not. If you want to say that modern psychology is just a way of labeling people so that they don't have to bother fixing themselves then I will pull you up on it because you are offering an opinion which is incorrect as if it is a fact. If I come into a fashion thread and say that cotton is a man-made fiber, or something that is equally and blatantly false, then feel free to pull me up on it.

[PappyTron]

That is a horrendously complicated question with a massive number of factors. Yes, many people are misdiagnosed, but in the past many people who had genuine issues were just told to "man up". Look at things like stress, PTSD, PMS, post-natal depression, or dozens of other things - people were just told to get on with it as it was "nonsense". The common culprits of misdiagnosis are things such as autism and ADD - things which are extremely difficult to correctly diagnose and are usually outside of the expertise of those such as GPs and social workers. Moreover, modern life has much more stimuli than yesteryear which in itself causes people to react very differently. Nevertheless, people who take the opinion that modern psychology is just a case of offering an opinion, clearly have no understanding of the field - it is most certainly done to a scientific standard on how it views and tests things.

First of all I know absolutely bugger all about psychology and all that and admittedly I'm basing this on nothing more than a perception that ADD seems to have seen a massive increase in cases since I were a nipper. I mean I'm not saying (not qualified to say) that these things don't exist but I just think it does seem like a bit of a cop out in many cases. I've worked with kids in a number of cases in the past where I've been warned that they were trouble and in pretty much every case it was simply a case of trying to engage them rather than filling them full of meds.

Right, but the question comes down to who diagnosed them and what qualifications does that person have. Many people are diagnosed by people that are, curtly, unqualified to do so. With things such as ADD or ADHD, because they garner a lot of media attention relative to other potential issues, they tend to also gather a lot of people who self-diagnose, or diagnose on behalf of others - "oh, my son definitely has ADD - he never sits still". That is far and away different to the fact that ADD is a very real and very much prevalent disorder - it just doesn't have to be as full-blown as what people think ADD is. Take a few posts ago when I told McCoy that he was suffering from Gluckschmerz - people who have no idea what the word means, what it relates to or where it comes from, start saying that it's ridiculous for people to have such a thing and that it must be uncommon because most people aren't like that. The fact is, it is one of THE most basic of human emotions; envy. When we see someone who has things that we want we experience envy and that is 100% natural - there isn't a single person who hasn't felt envy, if only for a second. The fact is that people hear lots of names and see lots of letters surrounding psychology and try and fit them into hard boxes (oh, he has ADD, she has PTSD, etc) whereas in truth, these conditions are far more transitory than people think - we have all experienced depression or periods of mania or withdrawal; the issue is that people hang onto the diagnosis even when it no longer applies ("oh, I suffer from depression because I was diagnosed 35 years ago and I must still have it").

[Dazey]

Right, but the question comes down to who diagnosed them and what qualifications does that person have. Many people are diagnosed by people that are, curtly, unqualified to do so. With things such as ADD or ADHD, because they garner a lot of media attention relative to other potential issues, they tend to also gather a lot of people who self-diagnose, or diagnose on behalf of others - "oh, my son definitely has ADD - he never sits still". That is far and away different to the fact that ADD is a very real and very much prevalent disorder - it just doesn't have to be as full-blown as what people think ADD is. Take a few posts ago when I told McCoy that he was suffering from Gluckschmerz - people who have no idea what the word means, what it relates to or where it comes from, start saying that it's ridiculous for people to have such a thing and that it must be uncommon because most people aren't like that. The fact is, it is one of THE most basic of human emotions; envy. When we see someone who has things that we want we experience envy and that is 100% natural - there isn't a single person who hasn't felt envy, if only for a second. The fact is that people hear lots of names and see lots of letters surrounding psychology and try and fit them into hard boxes (oh, he has ADD, she has PTSD, etc) whereas in truth, these conditions are far more transitory than people think - we have all experienced depression or periods of mania or withdrawal; the issue is that people hang onto the diagnosis even when it no longer applies ("oh, I suffer from depression because I was diagnosed 35 years ago and I must still have it").

I'll defer to your expertise on this one then fella. I was a little shit as a kid (hard to believe I know ) and probably would have ended up on some form of meds these days but my parents were switched on enough to give me a clip round the ear and cut out all the sugary shit from my diet. Worked wonders and I do often wonder how many parents take the time to look at something as simple as that before dragging their kids off to get diagnosed with something or other. One thing that springs to mind is Chloe who used to post on here a while ago saying that herself and her 9 or 10 brothers and sisters ALL had ADHD and to me that just starts ringing alarm bells. I mean what would your take be on a scenario like that?

[Redhead74]

And just to add, trust me, I'd love it if my current situation was just a figment of my imagination.

I lose a little more hope and faith on a daily basis. I certainly don't wake up every day and look forward to that aspect of it.

I'm slowly becoming incapable of being happy for people. Whenever I see someone enter in to a relationship, it certainly doesn't make me want to like or comment on their status. Put my fist through the monitor? Maybe. Celebrate their success in an area of my life that I'm deficient in? No.

The funny thing about jealousy which most people conveniently fail to realise is that people who have what others want (ie, a great job, a great relationship, a happy marriage, material objects) have often put in far more work and effort to obtain those things than the those without are willing to acknowledge.

The person with the great job probably worked a lot harder for years before to get that job, than the guy with the shitty job.

The person with the great relationship probably put himself out there a lot more and took greater risks to find that person, than the lonely guy did.

The person with the happy marriage after decades probably put effort in every day to keep that spark alive, than the divorced guy did.

The person with all the material objects probably sacrificed a lot of other things in his life, than the guy without the stuff did.

It's all relative to effort put in. And I'm talking about those with equal opportunities here. Before anyone chimes in saying how ignorant I am because the starving children in Africa and the street children in Odessa don't have food, education and opportunities.

[PappyTron]

Right, but the question comes down to who diagnosed them and what qualifications does that person have. Many people are diagnosed by people that are, curtly, unqualified to do so. With things such as ADD or ADHD, because they garner a lot of media attention relative to other potential issues, they tend to also gather a lot of people who self-diagnose, or diagnose on behalf of others - "oh, my son definitely has ADD - he never sits still". That is far and away different to the fact that ADD is a very real and very much prevalent disorder - it just doesn't have to be as full-blown as what people think ADD is. Take a few posts ago when I told McCoy that he was suffering from Gluckschmerz - people who have no idea what the word means, what it relates to or where it comes from, start saying that it's ridiculous for people to have such a thing and that it must be uncommon because most people aren't like that. The fact is, it is one of THE most basic of human emotions; envy. When we see someone who has things that we want we experience envy and that is 100% natural - there isn't a single person who hasn't felt envy, if only for a second. The fact is that people hear lots of names and see lots of letters surrounding psychology and try and fit them into hard boxes (oh, he has ADD, she has PTSD, etc) whereas in truth, these conditions are far more transitory than people think - we have all experienced depression or periods of mania or withdrawal; the issue is that people hang onto the diagnosis even when it no longer applies ("oh, I suffer from depression because I was diagnosed 35 years ago and I must still have it").

I'll defer to your expertise on this one then fella. I was a little shit as a kid (hard to believe I know ) and probably would have ended up on some form of meds these days but my parents were switched on enough to give me a clip round the ear and cut out all the sugary shit from my diet. Worked wonders and I do often wonder how many parents take the time to look at something as simple as that before dragging their kids off to get diagnosed with something or other. One thing that springs to mind is Chloe who used to post on here a while ago saying that herself and her 9 or 10 brothers and sisters ALL had ADHD and to me that just starts ringing alarm bells. I mean what would your take be on a scenario like that?

My take? In-bred Mormonism at its finest.

She probably had even more fingers than you do.

[Redhead74]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

Give it a rest Pappy. I know you hate me but I have every right to express my opinion here as anyone else does.

I base my opinion on many people that I have personally witnessed, such as excusing bad behaviour of their children as ADHD when it's plain to see they're shit parents. And people who claim they suffer from anxiety and depression who do NOTHING to help themselves except pop pills which have significant side affects on themselves and those around them. Just to name two off the top of my head.

I didn't know that expressing an opinion on any given subject on a GNR forum required a qualification to do so.

Has nothing to do with whether I like you or dislike you - it has everything to do with whether you are correct or not. If you want to say that modern psychology is just a way of labeling people so that they don't have to bother fixing themselves then I will pull you up on it because you are offering an opinion which is incorrect as if it is a fact. If I come into a fashion thread and say that cotton is a man-made fiber, or something that is equally and blatantly false, then feel free to pull me up on it.

Others in this thread made similar points but you didn't feel the 'need' to 'pull them up' on it.

Eye spy with my little eye something beginning with H

[PappyTron]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

Give it a rest Pappy. I know you hate me but I have every right to express my opinion here as anyone else does.

I base my opinion on many people that I have personally witnessed, such as excusing bad behaviour of their children as ADHD when it's plain to see they're shit parents. And people who claim they suffer from anxiety and depression who do NOTHING to help themselves except pop pills which have significant side affects on themselves and those around them. Just to name two off the top of my head.

I didn't know that expressing an opinion on any given subject on a GNR forum required a qualification to do so.

Has nothing to do with whether I like you or dislike you - it has everything to do with whether you are correct or not. If you want to say that modern psychology is just a way of labeling people so that they don't have to bother fixing themselves then I will pull you up on it because you are offering an opinion which is incorrect as if it is a fact. If I come into a fashion thread and say that cotton is a man-made fiber, or something that is equally and blatantly false, then feel free to pull me up on it.

Others in this thread made similar points but you didn't feel the 'need' to 'pull them up' on it.

Others in this thread weren't the last person to post, now were they?

[Redhead74]

Why does that matter?

[Thin White Duke]

So say selfish cunt. I know it doesn't sound as nice, but it gets the job done. And I have to disagree, sometimes there simply is no logic for human acts. People like things all neat and tidy, and to be able to point to something and say ahhh, ok, that explains it. When the explanations however are as diverse as the people themselves, and there's nothing neat and tidy about it. So let's keep coming up with more labels, eventually we'll find something for you, me and everyone else.

Fair enough. You're right that in some cases our acts have no logic but there is one thing about them and it's the fact that they are reiterative in different people. We like to think we are special, we tend to think we are somehow special, but the truth is that we aren't. And most behaviours can be observed in many different people. So they can be analyzed according to their similarities and differences. And maybe we can try to understand better the why of those attitudes and feelings.

I don't know your opinion about psychologly as a field and if you think everything is bollocks or not but I don't know, I don't see a problem with saying to a person that he is not a miserable asshole and saying him that what he feels is actually relatively common among other individuals. Maybe you're just trying to say that he is just fine and all he needs is to go play outside with his friends and stop feeling pity for himself all day. In that case, I agree.

About everything being labelled? I don't disagree but I think we are late to that war.

Labels for medical or pyschological conditions are just today's way of people excusing themselves from having to do anything to actually fix the problem. They're usually slapped on things that could be prevented or fixed by doing something other than pop a pill, and in reality is actually hard work mentally or physically. We're a lazy society who just wants to find the fast and easy way out of problems, rather than do the hard yards. The unfortunate side affect is that we miss opportunities to actually become better people, more balanced and truly understanding ourselves.

Do you have any experience working in the field of psychology, sociology or medicine? If not, do you think that your opinions should hold water? It's people like you who used to say to WW1 soldiers with shell-shock that they were just cowards and should man up.

Do you not think that certain disorders are massively over diagnosed though?

Where? That's the thing. We are people from all over the world, we are not exclusively Americans.

And second, I don't know but, is there any pill to make someone who feels miserable seeing others' happiness happy about it? I get your point guys but, in this case, it's just the observation of human reactions and behaviour. Actually, McCoy was told it was common to feel like this. No one said he had a problem and he needed to fgo to a doctor to solve his lack of happiness for others' happiness. Actually it's the opposite of what you're saying, isn't it?

(I also think it's not fair to say nowadays everything is overdiagnosed, actually mental health was underdiagnosed not long ago. If some particular country is ruled by pharma companies, then that's a different thing.)

And people who claim they suffer from anxiety and depression who do NOTHING to help themselves except pop pills which have significant side affects on themselves and those around them. Just to name two off the top of my head.

Someone with depression or severe anxiety can't actually do much to solve it. If you think they just have to get up and go out, you clearly have no idea what a hell of a bitch depression is.

Edit: Real depression. Not "oh no, my skirt doens't match my shirt, I want to die!!" kind of thing, of course.

Edited April 20, 2014 by Thin White Duke

[Redhead74]

It's refreshing to see someone who fully grasps the concept of earning things (great job, great relationship, great marriage, material possessions, etc) these days when self entitlement has become so common. Sacrifice and effort, two words that may as well be stricken from the English language.

Indeed. I actually regard anyone who has made some kind of outstanding achievement that receives public attention with the greatest respect and admiration, instead of feeling jealous over their achievements. There is no doubt that EVERY single one of them have given up significant parts of their lives to get there. Olympic athletes, noted sportsman and world class musicians usually gave up their childhoods to become the best at what they do. They spent hours and hours practicing when all their friends were playing and being kids. No one sees or understands that when they collect their gold medals, trophies or get standing ovations. Yet some people still get jealous over what they have in their life. Effort = return.