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Guns N' Roses Comic Article

FinckFortus

By FinckFortus
in 2006

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FinckFortus

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Axl Rose. I stopped musing to myself over where he’d disappeared to years ago – I simply assumed that the World of Rock had simply consigned him to the “$5 and under” bin of music, and that – hopefully – we might have heard the last of Guns’n’Roses.

Alas, this morning, I learnt that my prayers have not been answered. G’n’R will be back soon, bringing with it the high-strung caterwauling of Axl, but probably without the awesome guitar work of Slash.

I should at this point make an admission – I loved Guns’n’Roses when I was a kid. Appetite for Destruction was a great record. Their later stuff sucked prodigious amounts of arse, though…

So, now that it’s been ten years since G’n’R have released a solitary note of music, what’s happening? Well… Axl turned up at a party recently, being held to celebrate the fact that Korn have drastically increased their chances of dying in a bus accident by announcing that they’ll be touring again soon.

Axl stole the limelight by talking to a reporter about an album that he’s been working on for ten years.

Ten. Years. The lazy prick has spent ten years making a record. Holy hell – I wish I had ten years to work on what will likely be a piece of overpriced, over-produced dross.

But have those ten years in the studio made Axl into a better man? Unlikely – it’s certainly not sharpened his hold on any notion of popular culture.

When asked about his favourite book, Philip K. Dick's A Scanner Darkly, Axl said "I was a little scared when I saw they were making it into a movie starring Keanu [Reeves]. But I guess if he can handle The Matrix, he can do this."

I don’t know what’s worse – the fact that he thought Reeves did well in the Matrix (when it was obvious that he was only at work half the time, and the rest of the movie (including the speaking scenes) was acted by a wooden dummy operated by a puppeteer with severe palsy), or that he’s quite content to sit back and watch his favourite book be murdered.

I guess it’s ok with him, considering the brutal hatchet-job he did on popular music before G’n’R split up.

Source: CNNNN (http://www.chaser.com.au/content/view/2981/44/)

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FernandoL Newbie

FernandoL

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Axl Rose. I stopped musing to myself over where he’d disappeared to years ago – I simply assumed that the World of Rock had simply consigned him to the “$5 and under” bin of music, and that – hopefully – we might have heard the last of Guns’n’Roses.

Alas, this morning, I learnt that my prayers have not been answered. G’n’R will be back soon, bringing with it the high-strung caterwauling of Axl, but probably without the awesome guitar work of Slash.

I should at this point make an admission – I loved Guns’n’Roses when I was a kid. Appetite for Destruction was a great record. Their later stuff sucked prodigious amounts of arse, though…

So, now that it’s been ten years since G’n’R have released a solitary note of music, what’s happening? Well… Axl turned up at a party recently, being held to celebrate the fact that Korn have drastically increased their chances of dying in a bus accident by announcing that they’ll be touring again soon.

Axl stole the limelight by talking to a reporter about an album that he’s been working on for ten years.

Ten. Years. The lazy prick has spent ten years making a record. Holy hell – I wish I had ten years to work on what will likely be a piece of overpriced, over-produced dross.

But have those ten years in the studio made Axl into a better man? Unlikely – it’s certainly not sharpened his hold on any notion of popular culture.

When asked about his favourite book, Philip K. Dick's A Scanner Darkly, Axl said "I was a little scared when I saw they were making it into a movie starring Keanu [Reeves]. But I guess if he can handle The Matrix, he can do this."

I don’t know what’s worse – the fact that he thought Reeves did well in the Matrix (when it was obvious that he was only at work half the time, and the rest of the movie (including the speaking scenes) was acted by a wooden dummy operated by a puppeteer with severe palsy), or that he’s quite content to sit back and watch his favourite book be murdered.

I guess it’s ok with him, considering the brutal hatchet-job he did on popular music before G’n’R split up.

Source: CNNNN (http://www.chaser.com.au/content/view/2981/44/)

Maybe instead of questioning Axls record or Reeve's acting this hack could consider the fact that the only way he can get people to read his insane rantings is to bash Axl.

You sir are an over sucky untalented piece of dog shit, where the fuck did you learn to create articals?

You will go down in history as a dog fucking scumbag who wants to shock the rock world into liking you toilet paper comments because you lack the talent to research or do a fair honest artical, thankyou, good day and fuck you.

Dr Mutha fucking GOAB.

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  • 2 weeks later...
axlskAmpf DEMI-GOD

axlskAmpf

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Reeves did well in the Matrix (when it was obvious that he was only at work half the time, and the rest of the movie (including the speaking scenes) was acted by a wooden dummy operated by a puppeteer with severe palsy)

This was interesting! The rest, bile drek.

Still trying to figure this part out...

I stopped musing to myself over where he’d disappeared to years ago

So, is "years ago" a nice place? He says he went there.

What a dickhead.

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Appetite For Waiting Full

Appetite For Waiting

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The "$5 and under" bin is totally true.

As for the rest, I found it amusing.

Rubbish. You tell me where you can pick up a UYI or Lies for under £10. GNR retain a far bigger shelf in music outlets than most contemporary bands - as big as Green Day, Robbie Williams, Elton John, bigger than older "legends" such as Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, etc. Pretty impressive considering that they only released and handful of records and they haven't done anything for nigh on 15 yrs!

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