The Real McCoy's life issues and style advice thread

[Redhead74]

Someone with depression or severe anxiety can't actually do much to solve it. If you think they just have to get up and go out, you clearly have no idea what a hell of a bitch depression is.

Edit: Real depression. Not "oh no, my skirt doens't match my shirt, I want to die!!" kind of thing, of course.

Fuck off. You have no idea of my experience in life. Two of the closest people in my life suffer from depression. One has clinical depression and is single handedly building a growing business with triple it's employees from this time 2 years ago, in an economy that is shrinking. Don't talk to me about depression and suggest that I don't understand the impact it has on people's lives. I've seen it first hand, live with it close to me on a daily basis and have seen success and failure as a result of it.

Edited April 20, 2014 by Redhead74

[Lithium]

Snake-Pit is McCoy's alt account.

[Thin White Duke]

It's refreshing to see someone who fully grasps the concept of earning things (great job, great relationship, great marriage, material possessions, etc) these days when self entitlement has become so common. Sacrifice and effort, two words that may as well be stricken from the English language.

Again... how's life today in Disneyworld?

So...people in North Korea don't work enough? Someone who met the love of his life and happened to die in a car accident 3 years later didn't work hard enough for it? Dealing with a brutal crisis in Greece is Greek's fault and they deserve to have lost big part of his purchasing power? If you're a loving husband who buys flowers everyday to your wife and give her all the love in the world and you treat her like a queen... and still, she is tired of your 10 years mnarriage and run away with his younger coworker... is it your fault too?

Surely, you gotta work and fight for what you want... but it doesn't guarantee a happy ending. Life doesn't owe you your own personal happy ending. As I said, surely, you have to fight for it, but there are plenty of external factors, from the country where you were born, or the family (if you're really poor and have to work since you're a kid without being able to go t school tell me how you're gonna have an awesome career in the future) to the fact that even if you're an awesome person, shit happens. Count your lucky stars for being born in the cool feet but it's narcissistic as hell to think all you have is because you're worth it.

Someone with depression or severe anxiety can't actually do much to solve it. If you think they just have to get up and go out, you clearly have no idea what a hell of a bitch depression is.

Edit: Real depression. Not "oh no, my skirt doens't match my shirt, I want to die!!" kind of thing, of course.

Fuck off. You have no idea of my experience in life. Two of the closest people in my life suffer from depression. One has clinical depression and is single handedly building a growing business with triple it's employees from this time 2 years ago, in an economy that is shrinking. Don't talk to me about depression and suggest that I don't understand the impact it has on people's lives. I've seen it first hand, live with it close to me on a daily basis and have seen success and failure as a result of it.

No, you definitely have no idea what deppresion is. Clearly you were right before and everything is massively overdiagnosed then.

Edited April 20, 2014 by Thin White Duke

[Aaron_H]

And people who claim they suffer from anxiety and depression who do NOTHING to help themselves except pop pills which have significant side affects on themselves and those around them. Just to name two off the top of my head.

Someone with depression or severe anxiety can't actually do much to solve it. If you think they just have to get up and go out, you clearly have no idea what a hell of a bitch depression is.

Edit: Real depression. Not "oh no, my skirt doens't match my shirt, I want to die!!" kind of thing, of course.

Quoted for truth. I mean, with depression, things like exercise, keeping busy and eating healthily often do make a big difference (such that medication isn't required). The issue is that, for those who don't make these changes soon enough (maybe because they tell themselves that they don't have a problem and/or that they're making it up), particularly those who live alone, they're going to find it very hard to make these positive changes and things can easily get worse. These are exactly the sort of situations where medication can help a lot.

That's one of the dangerous things about this whole "man up" philosophy, it can cause those who suffer with these conditions to doubt that they even have them (or that they even exist), especially those who have grown up in an environment where they're not exposed to these sort of conditions. I believe that's one of the reasons why you see suicide attempts as "cries for help" - because the affected genuinely don't believe they have a problem (and think there making it up) and they want someone else to confirm it for them and help them.

Edit: I should mention that the type of people I'm talking about often don't go to doctors for a long time and so they're not likely to be the ones that think pills can solve everything.

Edited April 20, 2014 by Aaron_H

[Thin White Duke]

That's one of the dangerous things about this whole "man up" philosophy, it can cause those who suffer with these conditions to doubt that they even have them (or that they even exist), especially those who have grown up in an environment where they're not exposed to these sort of conditions. I believe that's one of the reasons why you see suicide attempts as "cries for help" - because the affected genuinely don't believe they have a problem (and think there making it up) and they want someone else to confirm it for them and help them.

Now that you mentioned that, there is another preconception about suicide that is widely used to bullshit around this subject. The myth that people who say they are gonna commit suicide don't end up commiting suicide because they just want attention. 8 in 10 people who commit suicide have warned or said before that they would do it. In most cases because they needed help desperately though.

It's McCoy's thread, let's go back to him.

Get a dog, McCoy.

Edited April 20, 2014 by Thin White Duke

[SoulMonster]

The myth that people who say they are gonna commit suicide don't end up commiting suicide because they just want attention. 8 in 10 people who commit suicide have warned or said before that they would do it. In most cases because they needed help desperately though.

That's a little bit of faulty logics. You have to look at the number of people who say they are going to commit suicide but never does (not how many out of those that actually committed suicide) to dispel the myth that those who say they are going to commit suicide mostly do it for the attention. It could very well be that only 1 in 1000 of those who say they are going to commit suicide actually end up doing it and still that 8 in 10 of those who actually did it warned about it beforehand.

[Aaron_H]

The myth that people who say they are gonna commit suicide don't end up commiting suicide because they just want attention. 8 in 10 people who commit suicide have warned or said before that they would do it. In most cases because they needed help desperately though.

That's a little bit of faulty logics. You have to look at the number of people who say they are going to commit suicide but never does (not how many out of those that actually committed suicide) to dispel the myth that those who say they are going to commit suicide mostly do it for the attention. It could very well be that only 1 in 1000 of those who say they are going to commit suicide actually end up doing it and still that 8 in 10 of those who actually did it warned about it beforehand.

Not to derail further, but I should mention that my point was not to talk about how suicide attempts are all "cries for attention", I certainly don't think that is the case. Just that sometimes people do go to extreme lengths to get help because they don't think people will take them seriously otherwise.

[Thin White Duke]

The myth that people who say they are gonna commit suicide don't end up commiting suicide because they just want attention. 8 in 10 people who commit suicide have warned or said before that they would do it. In most cases because they needed help desperately though.

That's a little bit of faulty logics. You have to look at the number of people who say they are going to commit suicide but never does (not how many out of those that actually committed suicide) to dispel the myth that those who say they are going to commit suicide mostly do it for the attention. It could very well be that only 1 in 1000 of those who say they are going to commit suicide actually end up doing it and still that 8 in 10 of those who actually did it warned about it beforehand.

I 100% agree and that's why I said REAL depression (though not only people who are actually depressed commit suicide). The world is full of attention whores, not doubt about it, and people who think their life is miserable because they are having a bad hair day. I repeat, serious depression is a hell of a bitch and people who say it's because they just don't feel like doing something and expect me to respect their opinions are not gonna get it.

Edit: that doesn't change the fact that 8 of 10 people who commited suicided said they would. Therefore, labelling everybody as "crying for attention" is of really poor taste. Don't twist the language as it suits you better so you make a point out of nowhere.

Edited April 20, 2014 by Thin White Duke

[Dazey]

My friend Naomi once tried to top herself and my buddy Phil and I got thrown out of the hospital for deliberately unplugging her heart monitor.

[Thin White Duke]

My friend Naomi once tried to top herself and my buddy Phil and I got thrown out of the hospital for deliberately unplugging her heart monitor.

You remind me of my grandpa.

[SoulMonster]

labelling everybody as "crying for attention" is of really poor taste.

Absolutely.

[Dazey]

My friend Naomi once tried to top herself and my buddy Phil and I got thrown out of the hospital for deliberately unplugging her heart monitor.

You remind me of my grandpa.

Sounds like a cool fella.

[ThinkAboutYou]

How about a thread for Snake-Pit

Snake-Pit's words of wisdom and mental thought process thread

Snake-Pit is McCoy's alt account.

[Dazey]

How about a thread for Snake-Pit

Snake-Pit's words of wisdom and mental thought process thread

Snake-Pit is McCoy's alt account.

As long as he agrees to post in that thread and that thread only then I'm all for it!

[SoulMonster]

This thread has too little McCoy.

[Thin White Duke]

My friend Naomi once tried to top herself and my buddy Phil and I got thrown out of the hospital for deliberately unplugging her heart monitor.

You remind me of my grandpa.

Sounds like a cool fella.

He really is. When people are having a serious conversation he tends to drop an anecdote out of nowhere and then he goes back to be quiet again leaving people like this...

I'm against a Snake's thread. His words of wisdom can't be limited to just one thread. That would be preposterous.

[The Sandman]

This thread has too little McCoy.

Will you people please stop making fun of his height.

[The Real McCoy]

Snake-Pit is McCoy's alt account.

[Thin White Duke]

I think you misread what I wrote, as I never said laziness and a refusal to make sacrifices must be the reasons for everyone who doesn't have a great job or a great relationship or a nice car or whatever. Those are the reasons why many don't have those things, but not everyone.

And I most certainly didn't say or even insinuate that the well-off have what they have because they've earned it. As just one example, those who are born into a wealthy family often don't do shit to get what they have. But I also know brothers whose parents are millionaires, yet the brothers still graduated university and bust their ass 60-70 hours a week at their job and they spend much of their free time studying/learning.

Yeah I agree, you're a tad bit cynical.

And I honestly have no idea what "cool feet" means?

I invent my own expressions because I think it's for lazy people to use others's ones.

I respectfully disagree. I don't think laziness is the reason why many don't have those things, I think it's the reason why some or many relatively "privileged" (privileged = with the means -both financial and physical/mental/environmental- and opportunities) people who could have those things don't. The world is big, you know. All I meant is that there are factors as powerful as laziness and I actually think it's a self-entitled attititude to think if you have something is just because you're that awesome.

I also think it's somehow elitist and arrogant to think people in less fancy jobs are lazy. There are people putting dozens of hours in shitty jobs to raise their kids and give them a better life. Are they lazy? I'm from a working class family, my dad spent 12 hours a day working his ass off for us during many years. He never had the opportunity to study. And honestly, 4 or 5 years in collge are not that hard if you have the means, including the brain. Because, that's another thing, not everybody has the ability to study either. And finally, in this day and age and in certain countries, a degree doesn't guarantee a good job at all either.

But hell yes, it's not gonna be me who denies the fact that you need to put effort in everything and work hard to get something, because even with all the effort in the world, you doesn't have anything for granted.

I'm cynical, yes. I can't help it.

[MB.]

Agreed Thin White Duke.

Your post is not cynical at all, it's just how things are.

[Redhead74]

And people who claim they suffer from anxiety and depression who do NOTHING to help themselves except pop pills which have significant side affects on themselves and those around them. Just to name two off the top of my head.

Someone with depression or severe anxiety can't actually do much to solve it. If you think they just have to get up and go out, you clearly have no idea what a hell of a bitch depression is.

Edit: Real depression. Not "oh no, my skirt doens't match my shirt, I want to die!!" kind of thing, of course.

Quoted for truth. I mean, with depression, things like exercise, keeping busy and eating healthily often do make a big difference (such that medication isn't required). The issue is that, for those who don't make these changes soon enough (maybe because they tell themselves that they don't have a problem and/or that they're making it up), particularly those who live alone, they're going to find it very hard to make these positive changes and things can easily get worse. These are exactly the sort of situations where medication can help a lot.

That's one of the dangerous things about this whole "man up" philosophy, it can cause those who suffer with these conditions to doubt that they even have them (or that they even exist), especially those who have grown up in an environment where they're not exposed to these sort of conditions. I believe that's one of the reasons why you see suicide attempts as "cries for help" - because the affected genuinely don't believe they have a problem (and think there making it up) and they want someone else to confirm it for them and help them.

Edit: I should mention that the type of people I'm talking about often don't go to doctors for a long time and so they're not likely to be the ones that think pills can solve everything.

From what I've seen the condition is usually present for years before its recognised and before anything is done about it. But once the condition is acknowledged I've seen three different people (all family members so very close to me) handle the situation differently. One was quite willing to accept advice and direction, and had a level of 'determination' to manage it (as determined as a depressed person can be, some days are good, some are bad), another just wanted medication and has taken it for years and refuses to acknowledge that anything else could 'possibly' help, and the other is newly diagnosed and is thriving in an environment where he has plenty of support and there is a lot of openness (ie, no shame or embarrassment) about the condition. Three different personalities and three different results/outcomes. I really don't believe that there is just a 'blanket' scenario for everyone. It affects each individual differently and their environment plays a big part in how they can overcome or live with the condition.

One of my best friends owns a martial arts academy and a common thread among many of the students there is anxiety. It's amazing how many young people who are struggling with these social conditions are actually quite proactive in trying alternative methods of overcoming it. And it works. It's life changing for many of these people and they learn to manage anxiety and more importantly possibly restrain it before it carries over into full depression. The fact that it doesn't have the social stigma that it had years ago definitely enables better recovery.

[DR DOOM]

I blame the internet, mobile phones and social media.

[Redhead74]

Best advice for McCoy before this thread hits 150 pages:

[The Real McCoy]

Best advice for McCoy before this thread hits 150 pages:

Hmm.

[wasted]

maybe Lionel Ritchie is a better role model.