Patience 4 Axl Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I wouldn't know, is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunnyDRE Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 (edited) That girl must like you to let you take her out on valentines on a first dateI get that, but like I said, it honestly almost feels dishonest to the friend of the friend.I know that she seems really excited for the date next Saturday. She told me earlier that she went shopping for a new outfit today.Like I said, it honestly wouldn't feel right to go out with someone else. I'm just going by my gut instinct here.I have to go with my conscience on this one.McCoy just a quick FYI about women.We will find ANY excuse to go shopping for a new outfit. It doesn't matter if it's because we're going to a wedding, a first date or the dentist office. That's what we do. We rationalize in our heads that we NEED to buy something new because quite frankly - we love to shop - for any reason we can possibly come up with. I will bet money that VD girl is also buying something new for Friday, she just hasn't told you. This so much.Last week I had a doctors appointment and a female friend took me, as I wouldn't be able to drive.So afterwards we stop at one of those dollar stores so I could grab some soup. She says she only needed some dish soup.An hour (and 3 cigarettes for me) later, she walks out with 4 new bras and some slippers. Edited February 9, 2014 by SunnyDRE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redhead74 Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I feel really sorry for girl #1, or VD girl. Not only is she likely to be McCoys second choice she also sounds like she has Venereal Disease. Poor thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I get that, but like I said, it honestly almost feels dishonest to the friend of the friend.Dishonest? To the friend of the friend? What about the poor girl on Valentines Day who you 'wouldn't have bothered with' who MIGHT be getting her hopes up and could be really into you? If you're totally into someone and going on a date with them there's nothing dishonest at all, regardless of who else you go out with. Like Totts said, its a date, not a marriage proposal. Potentially leading some other girl on though, when you're really not interested is another thing in my opinion. She might be getting her hopes up. its really not very nice.I had the date made with the online girl before I met the friend of the fiend. I just happened to hit it off with the friend of the friend.Online girl is V-Day, friend of the friend is Saturday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunnyDRE Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I still think McCoy should cancel with VD girl. He said the day of the date was just coincidental, not planned for VD, so it doesn't sound like the holiday is particularly important to VD girl. And we are only talking coffee here, it's not like she already spent money on concert tickets or movie tickets or some other event that required advance payment.You're fooling yourself if you think the day has no significance. The initial setting up of the date may not have crossed her mind immediately, but once she realized when it was, I assure you it does mean something. If nothing more than she will not be sitting home alone on Valentine's Day. And as much as people blow it off as a Hallmark holiday and it's only a commercial money maker for florists and Godiva, girls especially are wired, from a very early age, to give it some meaning. 'nother awesome post.And just piggyback off of what P4A is saying. Guys when you ask your girl what does she want for VD, many will say "oh, nothing". THEY DON"T FREAKING MEAN IT.Take it from someone who had to learn the hard way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 (edited) I do see it both ways. I mean, it IS just for coffee, and I don't like letting people down. Again, I didn't plan on making it for V-Day, that was just coincidental.I really just do feel kind of conflicted about it whenever it's making my anxiety flare up, which is why I think the fair thing to do is cancel it.Like I've said before, it's not like I made the date with this girl "just because", she seemed cool, so I asked her out. I won't ask someone out if I'm not genuinely interested.It just so happens than I met the friend of the friend pretty much right after I met online girl, and we just seem to be clicking better and have more in common.Online girl doesn't seem to be in to it either. There hasn't been any other contact there since I set the date. I've been talking to the friend of the friend every day so far. Edited February 9, 2014 by The Real McCoy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lithium Posted February 9, 2014 Author Share Posted February 9, 2014 Just do it, hooray for tolerance!. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tater Totts Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I do see it both ways.I mean, it IS just for coffee, and I don't like letting people down. Again, I didn't plan on making it for V-Day, that was just coincidental.I really just do feel kind of conflicted about it whenever it's making my anxiety flare up, which is why I think the fair thing to do is cancel it.Like I've said before, it's not like I made the date with this girl "just because", she seemed cool, so I asked her out. I won't ask someone out if I'm not genuinely interested.It just so happens than I met the friend of the friend pretty much right after I met online girl, and we just seem to be clicking better and have more in common.Online girl doesn't seem to be in to it either. There hasn't been any other contact there since I set the date. I've been talking to the friend of the friend every day so far.Have you made any effort to talk to online girl?Because you obviously are with friend of a friend, difficult to click with someone if you don't talk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patience 4 Axl Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I do see it both ways.I mean, it IS just for coffee, and I don't like letting people down.So then it's settled. Great, have fun! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 Actually, things just worked themselves out.The friend of the friend asked me if I would be up for going out on Tuesday, thus making the concert on Saturday our second date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patience 4 Axl Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 How does that work things out exactly? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 How does that work things out exactly?Being that I'll have already gone out with the friend of the friend, I'd really feel crappy to go on a date with someone else in between dates with her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 How does that work things out exactly? I was thinking the exact same thing!And when did this 3rd "Online Girl" enter the picture? Geez, I was gone for only 6 hours here ... There were only ever two. Online girl and friend of the friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 The friend of the friend seems really interested, so being that I have two dates with her next week, I think that answers my question that I have to cancel on the online girl.Ya'all can think the worst of me on this one, (and most of you pretty much already do), but this is what I feel is right, so I unfortunately have to do that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lithium Posted February 9, 2014 Author Share Posted February 9, 2014 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patience 4 Axl Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 How does that work things out exactly?Being that I'll have already gone out with the friend of the friend, I'd really feel crappy to go on a date with someone else in between dates with her.This doesn't get you off the date with VD girl. YOU would feel crappy? Is this a joke? What about her? This ain't just about YOU man. You made a commitment to meet someone, and you can rationalize it all you want so your anxiety doesn't "flare up", but VD girl is well aware it's Valentine's Day at this point. She obviously had no plans for that night, and now, with less than a week to go, you're going to tell her she'll have no plans again. Good move sport.Wow, I never pegged you for being a selfish prick, but that's exactly what you're coming off like here. I'm putting myself in her place, and maybe you should try doing that too. Guess you forgot what it's like to have someone blow you off. Not sure how you could, it's happened so often. It's unfortunate, because like I've said many times, I've been rooting for you. But this move makes me see you in a different light. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tater Totts Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 McCoy you're a fucking idiot. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gracii Guns Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 (edited) I wonder if McCoy eats these? http://www.chipsandcrisps.com/uploads/1/4/8/3/14831570/9490734_orig.jpgSurely there's a sponsorship deal to be had there. Edited February 9, 2014 by Gracii Guns Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tater Totts Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 (edited) Okay to be a bit nicer about it, put yourself in her shoes McCoy.How would YOU feel if a girl cancelled on you less than a week before the date which was to be on Valentines Day?This is going to come across very mean so I apologize, but since you refuse to listen to anyone's advice I kind of hope things with friend of a friend don't work out so we can tell you so, maybe you will listen to advice when that happens. I mean at this stage you take less advice than Miser. Edited February 9, 2014 by Tater Totts 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magisme Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 (edited) Guys, he totally can't go out with VD since he and friend of a friend girl will obviously be going steady by the end of Tuesday, followed by texting all day every day, followed by McCoy posts about how well things are working out and how he's trying hard not to get ahead of himself but things just feel so right, followed by OMG, I can't believe this is happening but she seems cold and distant all of a sudden, followed by she isn't returning McCoy's calls or texts, followed by more posts about how hard it is to be alone and how he'd do anything, except what is required, to improve his romantic prospects. Edited February 9, 2014 by magisme 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Sandman Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 Is VD standing for Valentine's Day or Venereal Disease? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 Like I said, I really don't feel feel proud about it either way. I'm really not trying to come off as selfish here, and I know that I do. I really felt like there was no way coming out of this without feeling bad one way or another. I have never been in this situation before, and I'm never going to put myself in it ever again.If things don't work out with the friend of the friend, then I promise you all that I won't come on here bitching about it. I'll mention it and move on with my life. I appreciate all of your advice, even if I don't take it all of the time. If anything, I do think that you all are right about trying too hard, and I finally agree with that. It took me a while, but I do see it now. Maybe I do need to just let things happen naturally. Hell, the events of this past week have shown me that anything is possible.I felt that there was no way to come out of this feeling good about myself. My conscience would bother me either way. Yes, I have my issues and I'll keep working to improve myself. I'm not doing such a great job of that yet, and I especially feel terrible for letting all of you down. I like ya'all and I appreciate all the time that you've spent trying to help a total stranger out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magisme Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 YOU TAKE EVERYTHING TOO SERIOUSLY. WE'RE TALKING ABOUT A COUPLE FIRST DATES HERE. CHILL THE FUCK OUT AND GO ON A COUPLE DATES. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axls Rocket Queen Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 YOU TAKE EVERYTHING TOO SERIOUSLY. WE'RE TALKING ABOUT A COUPLE FIRST DATES HERE. CHILL THE FUCK OUT AND GO ON A COUPLE DATES./thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real McCoy Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 YOU TAKE EVERYTHING TOO SERIOUSLY. WE'RE TALKING ABOUT A COUPLE FIRST DATES HERE. CHILL THE FUCK OUT AND GO ON A COUPLE DATES.I'm hoping the week in Nashville will help me mellow out a bit. It did wonders for me last year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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