Mary Jane and I broke up...anyone got experience with withdrawal?

[adamsapple]

Long story short I dived in because of a trauma, insomnia and physical pain. Refused happy pills and alcohol just doesn't hit the spot for me. Weed helped. Or so I thought. Until it got a little...out of control. Last week I was on 24/7 all day long. For seven days. Again. Not my first bender. First thing in the morning, last thing before going to bed and two or three more in between. Sleep. Repeat. Started out around .3-ish per single dose and after that week I was on 2.0 and still wouldn't get high anymore, yet enjoyed the relief, would go about my day and just feel normal, with at least some sort of quality of life. Tolerance.

I thought I was medicating myself and being smart, doing the right thing and rather use this instead of that. But in a moment of clarity, I decided to stop cold turkey yesterday. Now I can't come down, super anxious, nervous, tense, depressed, shakes, tired, sleepless, ashamed, thoughts racing and I'm afraid to dream. Everything cranked up to 11 after being shut down for a few days.

It wasn't the first time. I been doing that shit on and off with looooong benders for about four years now and in the past six months the breaks in between just got shorter and fewer until I ended up smoking for 10 days and then barely managing to get through three days without before I got me another recipe or called my man, beginning to hit it almost immediately after I got some. 48 hours ago I had the last hit and the amount I put in there was more than I had smoked in an entire year when I was younger and just using it occasionally for "fun".

Sure it's just weed I know but let me tell you weed withdrawal is real. It's not my first attempt to quit, so far the dreams (more like 3D nightmares that make me wake up screaming, sweating and crying with my heart pounding like crazy) always pushed me back as they're just so unbearable and gave me some real stupid ideas.

Trying to stay strong, wish me luck. I have no one to talk to about this, I'm ashamed and the doctors don't help. They don't listen, they don't take me seriously and they will just replace one drug with another which is not what I want. I want to be off any shit for good. What a fucking shit show.

Anyone got some experience yourself you feel like sharing? Any tips or advise? PM is fine too I don't gossip.

[Nick85]

Hey brother. I’ve been there. Got tired of wondering what feelings were me and what was the weed. Similarly to you it just got out of control and it was something I’d need the entire day, because God forbid I was alone inside my own wildly anxious mind. I quit cold turkey and started taking anti depressants, which have helped. I don’t know what your answer will be, but in the meantime I suggest trying to keep busy, listen to music, and do things that make you happy. Give yourself some Grace. We’re all just imperfect humans doing our best. Best of luck. 

[janrichmond]

Giving up weed is hard because it's a mental addiction, not a physical one. Maybe try to delay your first smoke and set a time to have that first one of the day. Slowly move your start time to later. 

Weed does more damage to your mental health, getting prescribed meds is the better option. IMO.

 

[username]

 

[adamsapple]

2 hours ago, janrichmond said:

Giving up weed is hard because it's a mental addiction, not a physical one. Maybe try to delay your first smoke and set a time to have that first one of the day. Slowly move your start time to later. 

Weed does more damage to your mental health, getting prescribed meds is the better option. IMO.

 

I refuse happy pills out of general principle. Might be of help for others, but it's just not for me. I'm no better though medicating with weed but at least I can still have sex and feel real emotions on it instead of becoming a vegetable on anti depressants. I've seen what these did to other people and I'd rather die than be in a zombie state like that.

To delay the intake might be an option, also trying and make the off time in between longer until I only smoke one on the weekend. If I relapse that is. Knowing me I'd just have to have one hit and I'd want more within twenty minutes and it all starts again. I don't like the chill and couch lock effects of weed, I crave the sativa onset, the rush, the mood boosting and euphoria. But that never lasts very long and as soon as it fades out my thoughts would go towards hitting the next one even if I was still high as fuck. Anyway, I guess I just need a fast foward button.

[adamsapple]

4 hours ago, Nick85 said:

Hey brother. I’ve been there. Got tired of wondering what feelings were me and what was the weed. Similarly to you it just got out of control and it was something I’d need the entire day, because God forbid I was alone inside my own wildly anxious mind. I quit cold turkey and started taking anti depressants, which have helped. I don’t know what your answer will be, but in the meantime I suggest trying to keep busy, listen to music, and do things that make you happy. Give yourself some Grace. We’re all just imperfect humans doing our best. Best of luck. 

Thanks, I appreciate your kindness. Keeping busy helps. Been cleaning the house and working out just to make some time pass. Even made diner but I can't bring myself to eat yet. I guess when the appetite comes back I should be a little better providing the body with some energy.

[Destiny]

Anti depressants can suck but also help. I know the doctors will tell you to stay on them for the rest of your life blah blah, but that's not possible for some. Maybe try a low dose and take it every other day till it builds up in your system and stay on it for a month to at least get you out of the trenches?

Just speaking from experience though, I know not everyone is the same. Have you ever tried cbd oils/ tinctures instead of smoking it?

[Gibson87]

I started smoking when I was 23, I'll be 26 in December. I have PTSD from my childhood so the weed slows things down and allows me to see things for what they are. The second or third time I smoked I realized I needed to end my toxic relationship and do some serious work on myself and let me tell you, it was the best decision I've ever made.

I'm a far better person than I was before I started smoking weed. It has helped me identify a lot of my shitty behaviors and how to correct them. My self-esteem, mindset, social skills, emotional stability and overall outlook are all 1000% better because of marijuana.

That said, it's all in how you use it. I take a 10mg edible 1 or 2 days a week to process things, make housework fun, be creative, etc. I'm also on a mood stabilizer, anti-depressant and an ADHD medication though because I realize that if I want to have a satisfying and stable life, I need to be on medication.

Meds aren't for everyone, weed isn't for everyone. At the end of the day, you just gotta do what works best for you.

[Powderfinger]

Weed as a solution to mental or physical pain alone isn’t a solution. For it to be of benefit I think its something to use as part of a list of things you do to help whatever the underlying cause is. Counselling, Physiotherapy, things like that need to be “used” as much as the weed in order to get well or better or live with whatever the underlying reasons your smoking it for. It’s not a replacement for other things. I think that’s more important with something like PTSD for example, talking to a person and having some support and a person who can empathize and give you skills to deal with situations is a must, the herb can’t help what a person can in those cases. 
 

Just my 20p

[Cosmo]

Weed helps with my anxiety, but I don't rely on it in any way, I also used to take meds and I still go to the therapist. Weed is more like the extra sauce for the days I find to be more tense. I stopped weed for over a year and didn't feel any drawbacks or whatsoever. Now I smoke whenever I feel like and whenever I think it might help with that issue. But not as regularly, that's for sure.

[Gibson87]

10 hours ago, Powderfinger said:

Weed as a solution to mental or physical pain alone isn’t a solution. For it to be of benefit I think its something to use as part of a list of things you do to help whatever the underlying cause is. Counselling, Physiotherapy, things like that need to be “used” as much as the weed in order to get well or better or live with whatever the underlying reasons your smoking it for. It’s not a replacement for other things. I think that’s more important with something like PTSD for example, talking to a person and having some support and a person who can empathize and give you skills to deal with situations is a must, the herb can’t help what a person can in those cases. 
 

Just my 20p

Oh for sure. I used to be a daily smoker to run away from things I wasn't dealing with. It's much more helpful when used sparingly in my experience. I'm on the autism spectrum in addition to the PTSD and ADHD so as you can probably imagine, I live inside my head quite a bit. Having an edible once or twice a week gives me a chance to sort through everything and sort of check-in with myself, so to speak. Therapy, meds and things like exercise, social interaction, self-care etc. much more effective when it comes to improving your mental health and processing trauma. 

Edited October 25, 2023 by Gibson87

[willl]

Had/have a similiar struggle myself mate, was a heavy weed user for 20 years self medicating ADHD/depression/alcoholism etc. Nowadays I stick to non-alcoholic beers for my beer intake, CBD for my weed intake, and blueberry vape instead of 20 marlboro's - took a while for me to wake up but I feel healthier and I'm more productive. I've slipped up more than once, still occassionally find myself on a week long 'lemon superhaze' induced bender, but the last couple of times when I ran out of weed I was ready to kick it as I realised I didn't actually enjoy it anymore. Sounds like you've reached a similiar conclusion.

Also word of warning and speaking from experience, avoid "legal highs", synthetic marijuana, salvia etc. They will fuck you up.

CBD leaf is okay, it's just marijuana with no THC. Probably just a placebo effect but if I get weed cravings and haven't smoked in months I find that it can relax me (absolutely zero high or stoned effect though).

Hope you're feeling better 

 

[adamsapple]

15 hours ago, willl said:

Had/have a similiar struggle myself mate, was a heavy weed user for 20 years self medicating ADHD/depression/alcoholism etc. Nowadays I stick to non-alcoholic beers for my beer intake, CBD for my weed intake, and blueberry vape instead of 20 marlboro's - took a while for me to wake up but I feel healthier and I'm more productive. I've slipped up more than once, still occassionally find myself on a week long 'lemon superhaze' induced bender, but the last couple of times when I ran out of weed I was ready to kick it as I realised I didn't actually enjoy it anymore. Sounds like you've reached a similiar conclusion.

Also word of warning and speaking from experience, avoid "legal highs", synthetic marijuana, salvia etc. They will fuck you up.

CBD leaf is okay, it's just marijuana with no THC. Probably just a placebo effect but if I get weed cravings and haven't smoked in months I find that it can relax me (absolutely zero high or stoned effect though).

Hope you're feeling better 

 

Actually I am, thanks! Not clean yet, but I managed to cut it down significantly. Last time it was just one normal joint instead of the stupid amounts I used to do. I can now go for three weeks without any weed and without anything else as a substitute. Still feeling like shit physically, but the mental aspect is better - which surprises me as I usually get super depressed this time of year, but not this time, not yet. But I'm scared of christmas time, probably gonna need some then to distract from the loneliness. I really miss my family.

By the way Super Lemon Haze is one of my favorite strains! Tried CBD (buds) too and feel the same way about it, but the CBD oil is actually pretty good, helps me a little with anxiety and insomnia.

[willl]

On 11/10/2023 at 12:17 AM, adamsapple said:

Actually I am, thanks! Not clean yet, but I managed to cut it down significantly. Last time it was just one normal joint instead of the stupid amounts I used to do. I can now go for three weeks without any weed and without anything else as a substitute. Still feeling like shit physically, but the mental aspect is better - which surprises me as I usually get super depressed this time of year, but not this time, not yet. But I'm scared of christmas time, probably gonna need some then to distract from the loneliness. I really miss my family.

By the way Super Lemon Haze is one of my favorite strains! Tried CBD (buds) too and feel the same way about it, but the CBD oil is actually pretty good, helps me a little with anxiety and insomnia.

Sounds like you're doing great, keep at it. Christmas is definitely a struggle for me too, I'm hundreds of miles away from family, and it's the only time of year that I'm guaranteed to have two weeks with absolutely no work calls. Yknow what 2 weeks of downtime and relaxation means.... I wish I could have weed in my possession and not smoke it, but my mind tricks me with those first few joints and I think I'm enjoying it (after the initial "fuck me that's strong" wears off anyway). I'm still pleased with my progress and glad to have kicked the beer/ciggies at least..... Mary Jane is still able to tempt me but I try not to beat myself up about it if I do slip up  You need to teach me how to moderate my consumption 

[adamsapple]

On 11/11/2023 at 5:27 AM, willl said:

Sounds like you're doing great, keep at it. Christmas is definitely a struggle for me too, I'm hundreds of miles away from family, and it's the only time of year that I'm guaranteed to have two weeks with absolutely no work calls. Yknow what 2 weeks of downtime and relaxation means.... I wish I could have weed in my possession and not smoke it, but my mind tricks me with those first few joints and I think I'm enjoying it (after the initial "fuck me that's strong" wears off anyway). I'm still pleased with my progress and glad to have kicked the beer/ciggies at least..... Mary Jane is still able to tempt me but I try not to beat myself up about it if I do slip up 

I slipped last weekend, had a panic attack so it was basically medicine to calm me down, only smoked half a gram and didn't go on a full bender this time.

Kicking cigarettes is tough, I'd say even harder than weed. If you can do without cigarettes I think you can do without weed too! But yeah, two weeks downtime and weed in the house is a recipe for disaster, at least for me. I try not to have too much around, so once I used up 5 or 10 grams max it's a reminder I already overdone it again and need to stop.

Quote

You need to teach me how to moderate my consumption 

I'll let you know when I figured that out