Even Newer Newest Newly New Brand New AKA Issac Newton of The Trill McCoy's life issues and style advice thread!

[The Real McCoy]

This thread is turning into a royal rumble...lol...

I'd expect nothing less.

[Axls Rocket Queen]

Just why?

[Patience 4 Axl]

You've got the power to make this nightmare end ARQ...

[Axls Rocket Queen]

If I can figure out how on my phone

[The Real McCoy]

The thread certainly isn't harming anyone by it's presence.

[pestilence]

god and religon do not have to be intertwined...kinda like

McCoy and females

[Lithium]

Fuck you Lith!!!!

Feck off, gob shite.

[Dazey]

The thread certainly isn't harming anyone by it's presence.

Exactly!

[The Sandman]

Unsure if sarcasm.

[Patience 4 Axl]

The thread certainly isn't harming anyone by it's presence.

I disagree. The entire forum is harmed by it's presence. This place isn't Facebook, Twitter, etc., and I don't appreciate people who want to act like it is. This place is a community, it's not about 1 individual. That's Miser mentality, and it's been shown it doesn't benefit the forum as a whole in any way.

The thread's existence is beyond insulting to every single member who has ever taken the time to give you genuine advice, people who put in the effort to really help someone who seemed as if they legitimately needed and wanted it. Instead, you pulled down your Lucky Brand jeans and took a big stinking dump on every single post, every word of encouragement, every suggestion, every good faith effort to assist you. It was a huge waste of time for all involved, and that's coming from someone who has wasted years posting on this site.

It's no joke when I say you need professional help, not musings from random people on a Guns N Roses forum. Relying on us and avoiding the actual care you need is detrimental to your well being. We are not here to take the place of an expert, your problems are far beyond what we can do for you.

[The Real McCoy]

The thread certainly isn't harming anyone by it's presence.

I disagree. The entire forum is harmed by it's presence. This place isn't Facebook, Twitter, etc., and I don't appreciate people who want to act like it is. This place is a community, it's not about 1 individual. That's Miser mentality, and it's been shown it doesn't benefit the forum as a whole in any way.

The thread's existence is beyond insulting to every single member who has ever taken the time to give you genuine advice, people who put in the effort to really help someone who seemed as if they legitimately needed and wanted it. Instead, you pulled down your Lucky Brand jeans and took a big stinking dump on every single post, every word of encouragement, every suggestion, every good faith effort to assist you. It was a huge waste of time for all involved, and that's coming from someone who has wasted years posting on this site.

It's no joke when I say you need professional help, not musings from random people on a Guns N Roses forum. Relying on us and avoiding the actual care you need is detrimental to your well being. We are not here to take the place of an expert, your problems are far beyond what we can do for you.

I've said a million times before that I appreciate all of the advice. Like I tried to explaih, it's a matter of sorting through all of it and seeing what works best. The first huge stumbling block always has been and always will be getting my confidence back and self esteem up.

Have you ever struggled with that? Honest question. It's not a matter of just waking up one day and flipping a switch. I do like Glow's advice of doing the mantras in the morning, though.

[pestilence]

you like the idea bit never implemented them...

[Lithium]

you like the idea bit never implemented them...

He needs to get confidence first.

[SoulMonster]

Playing along with your stated orientation, McCoy:

You should start dating really unattractive/old girls whom you don't like at all. The result of not wanting them will hopefully be that you don't come off as a needy, neurotic wimp during the dates, causing the girls to actually want to see you again and you to gradually gain some self-esteem and self-worth from dating someone at your actual, current attractiveness level. Then advance to girls slightly more attractive, keep dating less and less unattractive girls until you can get not higher. Ask the last one you dated who didn't refused to see you, to marry you, because she's the one.

[GivenToFly]

McCoy and Miser should get married to each other.

[The Glow Inc.]

I appreciate all of the advice. Like I tried to explaih, it's a matter of sorting through all of it and seeing what works best.

Reminds me of GnR..."Yeah we have a ton of material recorded and it's just a matter of getting together and deciding what to do with it".

[Guest Len B'stard]

I disagree. The entire forum is harmed by it's presence. This place isn't Facebook, Twitter, etc., and I don't appreciate people who want to act like it is. This place is a community, it's not about 1 individual. That's Miser mentality, and it's been shown it doesn't benefit the forum as a whole in any way.

Does containing it in one thread amount to that though?

The thread's existence is beyond insulting to every single member who has ever taken the time to give you genuine advice, people who put in the effort to really help someone who seemed as if they legitimately needed and wanted it. Instead, you pulled down your Lucky Brand jeans and took a big stinking dump on every single post, every word of encouragement, every suggestion, every good faith effort to assist you. It was a huge waste of time for all involved, and that's coming from someone who has wasted years posting on this site.

Y'know there's a difference between knowing the answer and having the ability to implement it? I mean the idea behind advice is, first and foremost, that its done in the spirit of compassion right? I mean it's not a decree of 'follow or die', is it? Everyone knows the answer to the worlds problems but it isn't as simple as 'just do it' is it, because were that the case we'd have world peace right now, wouldn't we? There's something ugly about this idea of advice being some sort of follow or die notion.

I mean, to put it simply, you're saying is follow the advice given...and if you don't thats grounds for condemnation...but try flipping it a little, what if your advice don't work for him, what if it fucks up his life completely, what if some advice given in this thread has nothing but negative repercussions for him, would you or anybody be willing to accept responsibility for that? Could you compensate him, could anyone? The point I'm trying to make here is that if your position is that he should follow advice and if he doesn't he's a cunt is kinda unbalanced because this is someones actual life (i hope ). So you can be as hard-arsed as you like about holding him to advice you've given but end of the day it's his life and he has to deal with the fallout from acting upon someones say so, no doubt if everything went tits up for him and he made a point of it in this thread more than a few people would speak up with 'you're a grown up, aren't you? No one had a gun to your head, did they?'.

The whole idea of advice in this kinda set up is that it's in the spirit of compassion, advice is not an order, if someone doesn't follow your advice it doesn't necessarily mean that they've ignored it, it could've been helpful in any number of ways i.e. maybe it was wrong and it became one of many wrong options that he crossed off the list in eventually getting to the right one.

This reminds me of those parents who tell their kid to do something a certain way and then when they don't they stand over them in judgement like 'well i told you it was supposed to be done this way'. Maybe he's trying in subtle ways, maybe its not as easy as waking up and going 'OK, such and such has told me to act different, so I'm gonna be a totally different person today', why don't you try, for one day, to act in a manner totally contrary to your natural inclinations? It's not as easy as just being told you know, otherwise everyone that ever left a classroom would be a grade A student.

Edited June 15, 2014 by sugaraylen

[Patience 4 Axl]

The thread certainly isn't harming anyone by it's presence.

I disagree. The entire forum is harmed by it's presence. This place isn't Facebook, Twitter, etc., and I don't appreciate people who want to act like it is. This place is a community, it's not about 1 individual. That's Miser mentality, and it's been shown it doesn't benefit the forum as a whole in any way.

The thread's existence is beyond insulting to every single member who has ever taken the time to give you genuine advice, people who put in the effort to really help someone who seemed as if they legitimately needed and wanted it. Instead, you pulled down your Lucky Brand jeans and took a big stinking dump on every single post, every word of encouragement, every suggestion, every good faith effort to assist you. It was a huge waste of time for all involved, and that's coming from someone who has wasted years posting on this site.

It's no joke when I say you need professional help, not musings from random people on a Guns N Roses forum. Relying on us and avoiding the actual care you need is detrimental to your well being. We are not here to take the place of an expert, your problems are far beyond what we can do for you.

I've said a million times before that I appreciate all of the advice. Like I tried to explaih, it's a matter of sorting through all of it and seeing what works best. The first huge stumbling block always has been and always will be getting my confidence back and self esteem up.

Have you ever struggled with that? Honest question. It's not a matter of just waking up one day and flipping a switch. I do like Glow's advice of doing the mantras in the morning, though.

Nah man, you're not getting it. You're in deep denial, like an alcoholic who can't admit he has a drinking problem. You're blowing your emotional issues off like it's simply a matter of building your self esteem. That's a big problem, and you're not doing yourself any favors, because it goes so much deeper than that.

Of course I've struggled with confidence issues. Who hasn't?! Open the relationship thread or the general chat thread and you'll see many people do. But none of them demand their own thread. None of them need the attention you so desperately want. And to be brutally honest, none of them come across as psychologically damaged as you are. Most of us look in the mirror and wish they could change something, most of us have little rituals that put our minds at ease, most have us have been in a shitty relationship, most of us have been teased as children, most of us can feel uncomfortable in certain situations.....but dude, you're on a whole other level.

Your issues are far more involved than just a lack of confidence. I'm not pretending to be an armchair therapist here, but it's pretty obvious from all that was posted in the last thread the confidence thing is merely a result of much bigger problems. In order to solve it, or at the very least accept it, you've got to work on coming to terms with - and letting go of - what has brought you to this place in your mind. And for that you need a qualified doctor McCoy, sincerely, not a bunch of strangers on a forum dedicated to an '80's band. That's just fuckin ridiculous. All the advice in the world here will not help you to come to terms with the hurt and resentment you are carrying around from things that happened years ago.

We are enabling your problems by offering advice like "don't text her", "go to a bar", "check out this video". It minimalizes what is really going on. That's neither fair to you or us. We're actually hurting you and holding you back from the help you need. Instead of expressing your thoughts to someone qualified to help, you've settled for inexperienced blabber from people who have not a clue how to fix you. It's not right man. You need to stop making us responsible for your shit and get the real care you need.

[arnold layne]

I am going to open up the Merriam Webster Dictionary The Hunchback of Notre Dame and start writing the dictionary book in this thread. Stay posted.

Edited June 15, 2014 by arnold layne

[Broskirose]

Arnold dominating the thread as usual

[The Sandman]

He dominates this like he dominates his love life.

[arnold layne]

THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE-DAME

Book I

CHAPTER 1: THE GREAT HALL OF THE PALACE OF JUSTICE.

It is this day three hundred and forty-eight years six months and nineteen days since the good people of Paris were awakened by a grand peal from the bells in the three districts of the Cité, the Université, and the Ville. The 6th of January, 1482, was, nevertheless, a day of which history has not preserved any record. There was nothing worthy of note in the event which so early set in motion the bells and the citizens of Paris. It was neither an assault of the Picards or the Burgundians, nor a procession bearing the shrine of some saint, nor a mutiny of the students, nor an entry of "our most redoubted lord, Monsieur the King," nor even an execution of rogues of either sex before the Palace of Justice in Paris...

[arnold layne]

...Neither was in arrival of some bedizened and befeathered embassy, a sight of frequent occurrence in the fifteenth century. It was but two days since the last cavalcade of this kind, that of the Flemish ambassadors commissioned to conclude a marriage between the Douphin and Margaret of Flanders, had made its entry into Paris, to the great annoyance of the Cardinal de Bourbon, who, in order to please the King, had been obliged to receive this vulgar squad of Flemish burgomasters with a good grace, and to entertain them at his Hotel de Bourbon with a "goodly morality, mummery, and farce,: while a deluge of rain drenched the magnificent tapestry at his door.

What set in motion all the population of Paris on the 6th of January was the double solemnity, united from time immemorial, of the Epiphany and the Festival of Fools. On that day there was to be an exhibition of fireworks in the Place de Greve, a may-tree planted at the chapel of Braque, and a mystery performed at the Palace of Justice. Proclamation had been made to this effect on the preceding day, with sound of trumpet in the public places, by this Provost's officers in fair coats of purple camlet, with large white crosses on the breast.

That morning, therefore, all the houses ad shops remained shut, and crowds of citizens of both sexes were to be seen wending their way forward one of the three places specified above. Be it, however, observed, to the honour of the taste of the cockneys of Paris, that this majority of this concourse were proceeding toward the fireworks, which were quite seasonable, or to the mystery which was to be represented in the great hall of the palace, well covered in and sheltered, and that the curious agreed to let the poor leafless may shiver all alone beneath a January sky in the cemetery of the chapel of Braque.

Edited June 15, 2014 by arnold layne

[The Sandman]

[Dazey]

Nate if you wanted to tell a story about a social outcast who skulks in the shadows hiding from the cold unfeeling society that shuns him you really could have just told us more about your time in college .