Spanking!

[Lithium]

I have never come to a situation where it has been necessary to hit my kids. There has been lots of situations where I have felt like doing it, and I can see how parents would do it and claim they had no other options.

You raise your kids by setting good examples (and hitting them when they misbehave is not a good example, in my opinion); by having clear, consistent rules ("it is never allowed to throw pebbles at the road"); by explaining the rationale for the rules, by various non-physical punishments ("if you don't stop throwing pebbles at the road we are going back indoors"); and by physically preventing them from misbehaving (like physically stopping them when they refuse to stop throwing rocks at the road). Well, these were just some methods, there are more I can't think of.

I have used timeouts when my kids have misbehaved at the dinner table. In those cased I have picked them up, carried them to another room and told them very clearly how it is unacceptable and that we won't be returning until they are behaving. They usually rage a bit, then start crying when they are refused to return (it is very boring being held by dad for some minutes when you want to be somewhere else), then stop crying and ask if we can return to the table. This behaviour have now completely ended.

I completely agree with all of this.

[Lio]

I agree, SoulMonster. That's how we try to do it too. It goes with ups and downs. Sometimes she's really well behaved and at other times, she drives me up the walls. BTW, I tried spanking her on the bottom, but she likes that too much

Yelling doesn't help. My husband can yell pretty impressively, but when he does, she just goes: Daddy, you're hurting my ears.

[Lithium]

And raising your voice is very effective, too.

Especially when for the father, I think. Kids respond instantly to a deep male voice rather than the higher pitched voice of women - I noticed this when I worked at a pre-school. The kids would shut up and stay still instantly if it ever came to the point where I raised my voice.

Edited May 16, 2014 by Lithium

[Thin White Duke]

Honestly, I remember as a kid... I think other kind of punishment were worse. I mean, not playing with the Game Boy for 2 weeks? The horror. I would have taken a slap over that any day. Parents tend to make a bigger deal of it than kids.

BTW, I tried spanking her on the bottom, but she likes that too much

Her future boyfriend will be very happy.

Edited May 16, 2014 by Thin White Duke

[SoulMonster]

I also think it is important to realize that as a parent you will simply not be getting your way all the time. You lose a lot of battles, situations where you feel powerless because the kids just keep on misbehaving. In such situations I understand many parents would resort to hitting them - because they believe them need to "win" every dispute to succeed as a parent, or because they are so outraged by the situation that they can't help themselves (it can be very frustrating when "your" kid doesn't act like you want him to). But I don't think it is necessary to be violent in these situations, either. Go back to the situation later on with your kid, talk to them about what happened and why that wasn't acceptable when the kid is calmed and ready for thinking it over. Sooner or later it will sink in - I believe. You can't change the fact that kids will be assholes and test our boundaries and cause and effect. It is what they are programmed to do, just like they are programmed to follow your examples if they are consistent and makes sense.

[pestilence]

as soon as you lose a battle your kid will know they won....and know

they can win again

[Apollo]

Abort that baby if you don't want a kid...... but never, ever, give little Johnny a swat on the behind when he misbehaves!!!

It's also sort of funny how the people who freak out if you use the term baby or human life in terms to abortion are the same ones who don't use the word spanking or swatting, but instead call it hitting or violence.

[SoulMonster]

You can't abort a baby but you can abort a fetus in early stages of development where its immature development makes it not eligible for human rights which would otherwise protect it (it simply isn't "enough" human). So yeah, abort that fetus if you don't want it but never use violence against babies and kids who are humans eligible for our protecting.

[Thin White Duke]

You can't abort a baby but you can abort a fetus in early stages of development where its immature development makes it not eligible for human rights which would otherwise protect it (it simply isn't "enough" human).

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2626149/Holding-dear-life-Mother-tells-miracle-daughters-milestones-10-weeks-born-legal-abortion-threshold.html

[SoulMonster]

You can't abort a baby but you can abort a fetus in early stages of development where its immature development makes it not eligible for human rights which would otherwise protect it (it simply isn't "enough" human).

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2626149/Holding-dear-life-Mother-tells-miracle-daughters-milestones-10-weeks-born-legal-abortion-threshold.html

What is your point?

[Axl_morris]

One thing is for sure, if you are going to hit children then make sure the parents are not present. They might get offened and get an bit angry with you!!

[Christinith]

Lol you always know it's a Dazey thread because there's always an exclamation point in the title.

Don't hit your kids. It's not beneficial to you or the kid.

[Dazey]

Lol you always know it's a Dazey thread because there's always an exclamation point in the title.

Piss off you and stop spoiling my fun! Don't you have a wedding to be getting ready for?

Edited May 16, 2014 by Dazey

[arnold layne]

Kids are fucking awful.

Source: I was a kid once.

[Gia]

I want to spank Gia.

I've been very bad

[Lithium]

I want to spank Gia.

I've been very bad

lemme clap them cheeks girl

[TeeJay410]

Never spanked my kid. I don't necessarily have a stand against it, I'm not sure out method of making him stand against a wall does any more or less psychological damage, but it's never something that felt right.

Someone mentioned an awkward moment with a kid and different race. It's a common thing, especially if the kid grew up around people mostly of their color. We were at the doctors office and my son asked a black guy why his skin was a different color, fortunately he was a good sport and laugh. I just said to him "you know how some people have different hair color and how some people have different eye color? Well some people have different skin color." And he just said "okay" and kept playing with his batman toys.

[Lithium]

Never spanked my kid. I don't necessarily have a stand against it, I'm not sure out method of making him stand against a wall does any more or less psychological damage, but it's never something that felt right.

Aren't you his stepfather, though? If I was the baby daddy, it would really rustle my jimmies if my kid's stepfather laid a hand on him.

[Lio]

Yeah, that was me with the awkward kid. We have a South-American in the family and Northern-African friends, but they're not quite as dark, I guess... But then another time (also at the doctor's office) she asked if another patient was a witch, as she had the nose of a witch, so it doesn't matter which race, she always has something rude to say

[Thin White Duke]

,I'm not sure out method of making him stand against a wall does any more or less psychological damage,

That's one of my main doubts/concerns. Every child is a world and one never knows how they will digest something. Maybe what we think it's the best option to educate them turns out to be worse for the kid. It always reminds me of when people decide to send their kids to the best school in Switzerland thinking it's the best thing for them but, then, when the kids grow up they always tell that they felt alone and hated it. It's rather complicated.

And btw, there are blonde whiteys in South America too.

[Lio]

And btw, there are blonde whiteys in South America too.

I guess that's directed to me... Okay, but our South-Americans aren't blonde whiteys

[sweetness]

Ha, you guys have kids

[Thin White Duke]

And btw, there are blonde whiteys in South America too.

I guess that's directed to me... Okay, but our South-Americans aren't blonde whiteys

I guess you're right. Anyway, I was just messing around.

[Orsys]

I figure a spanking will teach a child not to do something, but won't teach him why he shouldn't do it, which is kind of the important part. If I spank him for sticking his finger in a light socket. He won't do it anymore. But isn't it better to tell him that the socket will shock him badly and maybe kill him which would make me so sad. That educates him, let's us share a moment, and let's him know how important he is to me. Can't get all that from a spanking.

Having said that, I'm not sure how I feel about spanking. It could be a part of your arsenal of parenting tools I suppose, but you have to know how to use those tools. I didn't spank. I did, on a few occasions, hold his arm and gave my stern Mom look. That seemed to do it. But I didn't like it, really, because it hurt his feelings. And why do I want to take the most important person in the world and hurt his feelings? Maybe I was lucky. I was able to reason with him most of the time.

Edited May 16, 2014 by Orsys

[Broskirose]

TeeJay "my kid" LOL.

Haven't you walked out on him like 4 times now?