downzy Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 Anything you come across that makes you laugh (and doesn't violate the forum's content rules). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 (edited) Guy walks into a bar with 50 blondes in, he goes 'so, who wants to hear a blonde joke?' So this one blonde girl turns to him and goes 'hi, I'm Christy, I'm southern area shot put champion...see her over there? Thats Marie, she's the womans wrestling champion...see the girl in the booth over there? That Sarah, she's a Wing Chun teacher, well versed in 8 other martial arts...in fact, all fifty of us are top ranking athlete and sportswomen from across the globe...so tell me, do you still wanna tell your blonde joke?'Guy turns to her and say 'Nah, best not, i don't feel like explaining it 50 times'. Edited March 24, 2015 by Len B'stard 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amir Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 What do you get when you pour boiling water down a rabbit hole at Easter?Dead rabbits. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 Cheapjon needs to get in this thread, his jokes are hilairious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spunko12345 Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 (edited) I went to the shop with my wife the other day and saw some smoking hot 18 year olds. I joked "hey babe I bet you wish you still had legs like that?"She started bawling, everyone was looking at us weird as I pushed her up the ramp. Edited March 24, 2015 by spunko12345 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 Who ever said pigs can't fly has never seen this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 (edited) Pigtails blow job handles Edited March 25, 2015 by Snake-Pit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AxlisOld Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 Snake pit ruins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spliff Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 I need that 3 video series 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drtydane Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 Hahahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gracii Guns Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 Here's a Catholic joke. A man knocks on the door of a Benedictine abbey. A monk answers the door and the man asks "if I give you £10, will you pray the rosary so God gives me a Lamborghini?" The monk asks him "what's a Lamborghini?" The man responds "oh never mind", and walks to the Fransiscans.He asks the Franciscan friar; "if I give you £10, will you pray the rosary so God gives me a Lamborghini?". The friar asks him "what's a Lamborghini?" The man responds "oh don't worry about it", and continues his journey to the Jesuits. Our friend asks a Jesuit "if I give you £10, will you pray the rosary so God gives me a Lamborghini?". The Jesuit asks him "what's a rosary?" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CheapJon Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 I've got another catholic joke while we're on the subject.A catholic priest and young boy walks through the dark and deep woods. The boy says "I'm scared, these woods are creepy" The priest answers "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back all by myself". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 Thats more like it, go on Johnno my old son! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CheapJon Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 8 year old Charlie sadly asks his mother-Mom, why didn't I get any christmas presents. it feels like Sarah got twice as many as last year. - But Charlie dear. You know you've got cancer. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 wrong un Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moreblack Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1f4tla_go-bwah_fun Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CheapJon Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 How do you know that your sisters on her period?Because dads dick taste like blood.Daddy. I want to go to horse riding schoolHmm, sure, But only if you suck my dickUm, ok I guess.... Dad, your dick taste like poop.Well, your brother really wanted a new skateboard.Sister to her brother while having sexWow, you're better than dad!I know, mom said the same.Guy calls his boss- Hey, I can't come to work today. I'm sick- Really? How sick are you then?- Well I'm at home having sex with my sister, how sick is that?Let's change subjects now. Incest is getting stale don't you think?Little Jimmy with amelia asks his mother if he can eat some cookies"Of course Jimmy, the cookie jar is on the shelf above the fridge. Take as many as you want" Mommy snickered.- But mom, I have no arms!- No arms. No cookiesWhat's the best thing with Alzheimers disease?- Getting new friends everyday!There's this woman whose husband is in the army. They almost never get to see each other so she's starting to miss certain things. She goes to the local sex store. Since she's new to this world she asks the clerk for some help. He shows her a glass dildo and tell her about how slippery it can het, but if it breaks, it breaks so to say. He showed her a plastic and told her about the vibrations but that it needed to be charged every so often. She wasn't happy with that one either. After a while she saw a wooden box and asked what was in it. "Oh, that one, that's a magic dildo but it's very expensive" A magic dildo sounded very intruiging so she asked him how it worked. Well. You just say "Magic vibrator" and then the place you want "vibrated". That sounded great the woman thought so she bought it.On her way home she was so excited so she just had to try it out. Since she was driving she figured to be careful and said "Magic vibrator my shoulders" It worked and oh what a massage it was. She just couldn't resist so she screamed "magic vibrator my pussy" and it worked once again now even stronger, it seemed it was not only voice controlled but the loued she said it the more it felt. It stimulated her in ways she had never felt. She closed her eyes and came. What she didn't see was the car in front of which she crashed right into. No injuries but the 2 cars got wrecked.The police showed up minutes later and asked how in the hell she could have crashed into the car in front of her. The woman was embarrassed but told the police man the story about her husband and the magic dildo.The police laughed at her explanation. "Yeah right, you're coming with us to the station, Magic dildo? My ass!" 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted March 26, 2015 Share Posted March 26, 2015 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 (edited) What did the deaf, dumb and blind kid get for Christmas?Polio. Edited March 27, 2015 by Dazey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted March 27, 2015 Share Posted March 27, 2015 What did the deaf, dumb and blind kid get for Christmas?Touched by Jimmy Savile Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 Two guys walk into a bar, and it's not a gay bar... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 Two guys walk into a pub, and it's not a gay pub... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CheapJon Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 I don't get it, is it sort of like this one?2 girls walks in to a club and they're not raped... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake-Pit Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 Mr Singh walked into a bank in Central London and asks for the loan officer. He says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan, so the Mr Singh hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checks out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the man returns, repays the £5, 000 and the interest, which comes to £15. 41. The loan officer says, "We are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled sir. While you were away on business, we checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire! What puzzles us is why would you bother to borrow £5, 000?"Mr Singh replied, "Where else in Central London can I park my car for two weeks for £15? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wasted Posted April 29, 2015 Share Posted April 29, 2015 I would kill everyone in this thread for a beer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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