The Hangover/I'm an Alcoholic Thread

[Powerage5]

On July 19, 2016 at 6:11 PM, wasted said:

Koppaberg strawberry and lime cider. The end is nigh. But it was quite refreshing. 

I don't even care if they're considered a bitch drink, they're so fucking good. All we can get in the US is the pear Kopparberg. 

 

Anyone on here use Untappd?

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

On 4/30/2016 at 0:19 AM, Len B'stard said:

Its also apparently a tramps favourite cuz, allegedly though I've never bought this, it dont smell so people cant tell you're pissed, I'm told this lots though its not been true in my experience.

vodka does smell. i worked with a woman who drank it on the sly at work and i could always tell when she'd been drinking it. i think it's an old wive's tale. she got fired cos another co-worker told our boss that she reeked of alcohol. whenever i use certain kinds of hand sanitizer it smells like her breath...like straight vodka!

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

On 4/29/2016 at 7:35 PM, wasted said:

Drank half a bottle of gin. Feel slightly hungover but mosquito free. 

straight gin?

[DieselDaisy]

Intelligent drinkers carry a bottle of Listerine with them

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

6 hours ago, DieselDaisy said:

Intelligent drinkers carry a bottle of Listerine with them

desperate drunks drink the listerine!

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

so i don't know if this fits here or will end up being moved but does anyone have an interesting story about turning 21 or whatever the legal age is for drinking? or one for the most interesting/worst thing you've done while drunk?

[Len Cnut]

21 hours ago, AxlsFavoriteRose said:

so i don't know if this fits here or will end up being moved but does anyone have an interesting story about turning 21 or whatever the legal age is for drinking? or one for the most interesting/worst thing you've done while drunk?

Not quite a legal age story but here goes.  Me and my mate bunked off school when we were 13 and went to this little villiage type town about 13 miles or so out having heard that there was a pub there that served alcohol to people underage, mostly because it generally serves locals and doesn't have the usual ID issues and the odd youngster escapes notice.  So anyway, me and my mate Jim make our way there, having basically just walked out of the fuckin' schoolgates (pretty dumb way to bunk off school, show up for registration and then disappear for the rest of the day).  So we show up, i go to the bar being the tallest (though i didn't look anything like 18) and ordered a couple of pints for me and my mate.  And would you believe it we got served!  So there we are, having our drink enjoying ourselves.  Then another...and another...and another...got up to about our fifth pint and we were feeling pretty pissed, being only kids at the time.  So we went up to the bar and sat down, supping away, smoking these fags we'd got out of the vending machine and we start taking the piss out of the teachers.  'doesn't Mr Timms breath fuckin' stink?'  etc etc.  Then we got on to talking about this teacher who had a peculiar skin complaint whereby he had these weird purple blotches on his face.  We're howling with laughter at this point 'he looks like a mutant cabbage!' 'one of the blotches has a boil in the middle, looks like he's got a nipple of his forehead!'.  And who would happen to be on his day off and sit at the bar right next to us?   Now what are the fucking chances of that happening?!?   I mean it's got to be in the fuckin' billions, i didn't even knew he lived around there, still don't fuckin' know whether he lived around there actually, he was just fuckin' there!  He goes 'clever little boys aren't you?  Well, lets see how clever you're gonna look with a weeks suspension on your records!'.  So he grabs my mate Jim by the arm who tries to shake himself loose and starts making a commotion and me, in a moment of inspired stupidity shouted something like 'HELP, THIS NONCE IS TRYIN TO KIDNAP US!'   A couple of the pub patrons approach him at which point he lets go and explains he's a teacher and we're bunking off school, which results in us doing what you would expect of kids in this situation, we ran like fuck   We ran and ran and ran and ran as far as our little legs would carry us, decided on the way home that we'd deny everything, fake notes from our Mums n Dads, get our siblings to intercept the phone calls from the school and our parents would never know (although how that woulda worked i dont know cuz we'd gone to registration that day!).  Anyway we get to my mate Jims home and his Dad opens the door and we go in and he goes 'so how was your day today boys?' and we're like yeah, it was alright, had this lesson and that lesson' blah blah blah and he suddenly goes 'you lying little bastards!', whacks my mate Jim across the face now tell me the truth!  We still didn't own up and he goes i don't need you to tell me the truth cuz i know the fuckin' truth, you've been bunking off school down the pub, in St Albans, how the bloody hell did you get to St Albans?' anyway, he takes me home, the old man gives me a good old hiding and we both got suspended.  Whoops

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

50 minutes ago, Len B'stard said:

Not quite a legal age story but here goes.  Me and my mate bunked off school when we were 13 and went to this little villiage type town about 13 miles or so out having heard that there was a pub there that served alcohol to people underage, mostly because it generally serves locals and doesn't have the usual ID issues and the odd youngster escapes notice.  So anyway, me and my mate Jim make our way there, having basically just walked out of the fuckin' schoolgates (pretty dumb way to bunk off school, show up for registration and then disappear for the rest of the day).  So we show up, i go to the bar being the tallest (though i didn't look anything like 18) and ordered a couple of pints for me and my mate.  And would you believe it we got served!  So there we are, having our drink enjoying ourselves.  Then another...and another...and another...got up to about our fifth pint and we were feeling pretty pissed, being only kids at the time.  So we went up to the bar and sat down, supping away, smoking these fags we'd got out of the vending machine and we start taking the piss out of the teachers.  'doesn't Mr Timms breath fuckin' stink?'  etc etc.  Then we got on to talking about this teacher who had a peculiar skin complaint whereby he had these weird purple blotches on his face.  We're howling with laughter at this point 'he looks like a mutant cabbage!' 'one of the blotches has a boil in the middle, looks like he's got a nipple of his forehead!'.  And who would happen to be on his day off and sit at the bar right next to us?   Now what are the fucking chances of that happening?!?   I mean it's got to be in the fuckin' billions, i didn't even knew he lived around there, still don't fuckin' know whether he lived around there actually, he was just fuckin' there!  He goes 'clever little boys aren't you?  Well, lets see how clever you're gonna look with a weeks suspension on your records!'.  So he grabs my mate Jim by the arm who tries to shake himself loose and starts making a commotion and me, in a moment of inspired stupidity shouted something like 'HELP, THIS NONCE IS TRYIN TO KIDNAP US!'   A couple of the pub patrons approach him at which point he lets go and explains he's a teacher and we're bunking off school, which results in us doing what you would expect of kids in this situation, we ran like fuck   We ran and ran and ran and ran as far as our little legs would carry us, decided on the way home that we'd deny everything, fake notes from our Mums n Dads, get our siblings to intercept the phone calls from the school and our parents would never know (although how that woulda worked i dont know cuz we'd gone to registration that day!).  Anyway we get to my mate Jims home and his Dad opens the door and we go in and he goes 'so how was your day today boys?' and we're like yeah, it was alright, had this lesson and that lesson' blah blah blah and he suddenly goes 'you lying little bastards!', whacks my mate Jim across the face now tell me the truth!  We still didn't own up and he goes i don't need you to tell me the truth cuz i know the fuckin' truth, you've been bunking off school down the pub, in St Albans, how the bloody hell did you get to St Albans?' anyway, he takes me home, the old man gives me a good old hiding and we both got suspended.  Whoops

hahahaha! that was great! SO worth getting out of bed this morning just to read this 

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

32 minutes ago, AxlsFavoriteRose said:

hahahaha! that was great! SO worth getting out of bed this morning just to read this 

now my story is going to sound so lame. i had been experimenting with alcohol ever since i was around 11 and i went into our hall closet and found a bottle of creme de menthe. i started drinking it because one, i was curious and two i was pissed cos my family was moving from Texas to California. but nothing happened. then when i was 14 my older brother ( long moved out of the house  ) and his gf came by with this cheap ass wine called Bali High which i can only assume was a pansy version of Nightrain wine. my friend was over and we both had some and she got so wasted and i felt nothing even though i'd also been nipping off a bottle of vodka from my parents liquor cabinet. i was like wtf?? why can't i get drunk?? i didn't feel any different. ok so about a year later i went to a graduation party out on one of the outlying farms from where i lived; my bf had a small motorcycle and i'm surprised my parents let me go, but for some reason they did. so we were at the party and there was tons of beer and champagne and i was drinking a lot of both and i remember thinking wow i'm drunk! it finally happened! the rest of the party i do not recall but i guess at some point people decided i was TOO drunk like black out possibly alcohol poisoning drunk. there was no way i was getting home on the back of that motorcycle so they called my mom and she came and got me. we were about halfway home and i was starting to sober up a little when i began puking. i made it so my head was out of the car thank God. we got home and my brother was what the heck is wrong with her and my mom saying i'd had bad pizza! the next day i was waiting for all hell to break loose but nothing happened. ever. not a word was ever spoken, no punishment ever came and i was relieved but also really puzzled. during the Bali High incident where my friend got drunk and we had to deliver her home still intoxicated in spite of all our best efforts to sober her up; black coffee, cold shower, trying to make her puke by taking her on a ride in bro's car on a curvy road going fast as hell ( he swore this would induce her to vomit but she was passed out the whole time ) i was put on restriction for a month even though i thought i argued very sensibly that i myself neither supplied the booze nor made her drink it. yet when it came to me getting drunk nothing? we never ever even spoke of it again.

now my turning 21 was not a great outlandish event. i'd been drinking for years, had gone to bars, bought liquor legally one summer when i was in a state where the drinking age was 18 etc. but for my 21st bd i'd heard there was a liquor store right by me that carded EVERYONE. so just before midnight i made my way there. i went in, looked around, made my selection and went to check out. it was maybe 5 minutes after midnight so i was 5 minutes legal. he asked for my ID, i smiled and said sure. i handed it to him. he looked at it, looked at me and then looked at the clock. he did this a couple of times then shook his head and said ok i guess i HAVE to sell this to you!  i could tell if he could have found a way around it he'd have done it in a New York minute

[Len Cnut]

How the fuck did they not smell it on you in ur mums car? . And that swervy road idea is inspired! . 

[DieselDaisy]

There must be a trend of having teachers with dermatological issues; I had a teacher with a forehead which looked like it had been stamped with a red hot iron. 

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

38 minutes ago, Len B'stard said:

How the fuck did they not smell it on you in ur mums car? . And that swervy road idea is inspired! . 

oh she knew i was drunk. she just never acknowledged it. i don't think she ever told my dad. now the time i snuck out to my stoner friend's house an my teen age neighbor who had given me a ride and narked me out was totally different. we were all baked as can be and decided to go get Jack in the Box. when we got back to my absolute horror my parents were there! i was thoroughly admonished on the horrors of evil marijuana ( think Reefer Madness. ) this time i did not try and reason my way out of it, there was a lot of eff you's thrown at them which probably just made them feel all righteous that they were lecturing me on bad bad marijuana

[spunko12345]

When we were 15 and fed up of scrabbling about to buy booze me and 3 friends had a great idea that we would just brew our own, easy peasy eh? Why didn't anyone else thing think of it?

Billys dad even had all the kit so we just bought a load of yeast, sugar and whatever other shit goes into beer and set up a little fucking brewery in billy dad's shed .

After we had left it to its own devices for a while we all sat down in my mates living room on Christmas eve to play monopoly with about five 2 litre coke bottles full of this minging brown slop and a soapbar.

After about an hour we were properly messed up and one of my mates Oggy, who was hard as nails but thick as fuck, slurred the immortal line "if i won the lottery I would buy a house down The old barn (a local estate he lived on) with double glazing and everything"

We all started laughing at him, so oggy in his pissed state launched the fucking monopoly board accross the room and went beserk  My mates dad came in the room and kicked us all out. 2 of us went on to sleep in the park and fuck knows where oggy got to. He was the kid who instead of going egging on Halloween went golf balling

[darknightfan]

guys. drunk. gnr. yes.

[Słash]

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

On 8/18/2016 at 11:28 AM, spunko12345 said:

When we were 15 and fed up of scrabbling about to buy booze me and 3 friends had a great idea that we would just brew our own, easy peasy eh? Why didn't anyone else thing think of it?

Billys dad even had all the kit so we just bought a load of yeast, sugar and whatever other shit goes into beer and set up a little fucking brewery in billy dad's shed .

After we had left it to its own devices for a while we all sat down in my mates living room on Christmas eve to play monopoly with about five 2 litre coke bottles full of this minging brown slop and a soapbar.

After about an hour we were properly messed up and one of my mates Oggy, who was hard as nails but thick as fuck, slurred the immortal line "if i won the lottery I would buy a house down The old barn (a local estate he lived on) with double glazing and everything"

We all started laughing at him, so oggy in his pissed state launched the fucking monopoly board accross the room and went beserk  My mates dad came in the room and kicked us all out. 2 of us went on to sleep in the park and fuck knows where oggy got to. He was the kid who instead of going egging on Halloween went golf balling

lol that's great! what did it taste like?? 

[PappyTron]

On 18/08/2016 at 3:40 PM, Len B'stard said:

Not quite a legal age story but here goes.  Me and my mate bunked off school when we were 13 and went to this little villiage type town about 13 miles or so out having heard that there was a pub there that served alcohol to people underage, mostly because it generally serves locals and doesn't have the usual ID issues and the odd youngster escapes notice.  So anyway, me and my mate Jim make our way there, having basically just walked out of the fuckin' schoolgates (pretty dumb way to bunk off school, show up for registration and then disappear for the rest of the day).  So we show up, i go to the bar being the tallest (though i didn't look anything like 18) and ordered a couple of pints for me and my mate.  And would you believe it we got served!  So there we are, having our drink enjoying ourselves.  Then another...and another...and another...got up to about our fifth pint and we were feeling pretty pissed, being only kids at the time.  So we went up to the bar and sat down, supping away, smoking these fags we'd got out of the vending machine and we start taking the piss out of the teachers.  'doesn't Mr Timms breath fuckin' stink?'  etc etc.  Then we got on to talking about this teacher who had a peculiar skin complaint whereby he had these weird purple blotches on his face.  We're howling with laughter at this point 'he looks like a mutant cabbage!' 'one of the blotches has a boil in the middle, looks like he's got a nipple of his forehead!'.  And who would happen to be on his day off and sit at the bar right next to us?   Now what are the fucking chances of that happening?!?   I mean it's got to be in the fuckin' billions, i didn't even knew he lived around there, still don't fuckin' know whether he lived around there actually, he was just fuckin' there!  He goes 'clever little boys aren't you?  Well, lets see how clever you're gonna look with a weeks suspension on your records!'.  So he grabs my mate Jim by the arm who tries to shake himself loose and starts making a commotion and me, in a moment of inspired stupidity shouted something like 'HELP, THIS NONCE IS TRYIN TO KIDNAP US!'   A couple of the pub patrons approach him at which point he lets go and explains he's a teacher and we're bunking off school, which results in us doing what you would expect of kids in this situation, we ran like fuck   We ran and ran and ran and ran as far as our little legs would carry us, decided on the way home that we'd deny everything, fake notes from our Mums n Dads, get our siblings to intercept the phone calls from the school and our parents would never know (although how that woulda worked i dont know cuz we'd gone to registration that day!).  Anyway we get to my mate Jims home and his Dad opens the door and we go in and he goes 'so how was your day today boys?' and we're like yeah, it was alright, had this lesson and that lesson' blah blah blah and he suddenly goes 'you lying little bastards!', whacks my mate Jim across the face now tell me the truth!  We still didn't own up and he goes i don't need you to tell me the truth cuz i know the fuckin' truth, you've been bunking off school down the pub, in St Albans, how the bloody hell did you get to St Albans?' anyway, he takes me home, the old man gives me a good old hiding and we both got suspended.  Whoops

Lenny: "Please....I've got a heart condition. If you hit me, Mr Teacher, it'll be murder"

[spunko12345]

23 minutes ago, AxlsFavoriteRose said:

lol that's great! what did it taste like?? 

Just, not good. I can't remember to be honest but it was dark brown with bits at the bottom. In empty coke bottles which somehow made it more grim.

[PappyTron]

3 minutes ago, spunko12345 said:

it was dark brown with bits at the bottom

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

4 minutes ago, spunko12345 said:

Just, not good. I can't remember to be honest but it was dark brown with bits at the bottom. In empty coke bottles which somehow made it more grim.

ewwwww lol! BUT it got you buzzed and you didn't die! if i would have attempted to make my own i'm sure it would have killed me

[Len Cnut]

I tried this Moonshine a couple of weeks back, 64% alcohol.  Was pretty good.  Theres some Polish Vodka out there thats 98%, i wanna try that next.

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

do you have Everclear there? sounds like you might want to try it!

p.s. this is funny

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=everclear

[Len Cnut]

On 20 August 2016 at 6:41 PM, AxlsFavoriteRose said:

do you have Everclear there? sounds like you might want to try it!

p.s. this is funny

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=everclear

I'm pretty sure i got over double figures with the moonshine so i might give this a go, although 64 and 98 are two different things.  

[Dazey]

3 hours ago, Len B'stard said:

I'm pretty sure i got over double figures with the moonshine so i might give this a go, although 64 and 98 are two different things.  

I know how to build a still if that's of any use? It's kind'f a fundamental part of my job.

[Len Cnut]

11 minutes ago, Dazey said:

I know how to build a still if that's of any use? It's kind'f a fundamental part of my job.

I dont trust myself with that sort of thing, I'd probably poison myself . I didnt make my own moonshine, i bought it online.

Edited August 24, 2016 by Len B'stard