The Real McCoy's life issues and style advice thread

[Guest Len B'stard]

Now look here sir, whats the point in all this self analysis if you ain't gonna do nothing about it? Thats sort of the purpose right you identify issues and then you deal with em, thats kinda why this and actually psychoanalysis were invented (not that this is psychoanalysis but you know what I mean, the principle behind this kinda shit is what I'm getting at. So like, OK, you discover that you're uncomfortable in restaurants, bars, well then go to those motherfuckers then man.

The point of finding this shit out isn't so you can refine your list of shit Mccoy won't do, especially if that list consists of shit that most other folk do with ease like eating in restaurants on your own or etc etc, whatever your particular things are. The point of seeking this shit out and seeking to understand oneself is with a view to self improvement, expanding your horizons, not narrowing the parameters even further.

Why you gotta take the fuckin' easy way out always man? I ain't tryna be rude but like, OK, i don't feel comfortable in restaurants on my own, so i just ain't gonna do that shit, well fuck man i don't feel comfortable going to the dentist but i don't just go, OK, thats uncomfy so i'm just gonna let my fuckin' gob go septic or whatever, fuckin' do that shit.

Like John Cassavetes said when i was a kid I purposely sought out all the places and situations in life that i found awkward and/or uncomfortable and purposely sought to put myself in those situations so you get all this anxiety and hang up shit out of your system.

It's OK to be afraid or nervous or anxious, it's a part of the human condition, we all feel it on some level but fuck man, doesn't it make you feel alive some as well? I mean seriously, if the other option is going home watching Keith Urban videos alone in your little flat in Pensylvannia is it that you're at now? then fuck man, maybe a bit of anxious type fuckin' feeling is what you need in your life right now I mean, you been spending your life avoiding that shit and cultivating your comfort zone for fuck knows how long, how far has that shit got you, ain't it time to turn the apple round and take a bite out the other end?

You're a perfectly healthy young man, all your fuckin' limbs and a good job and like, everything in the world going for ya, what the fuck have you got to be anxious and uncomfortable in your fuckin' skin over? You're a DJ, thats literally one of the coolest professions ever, look at Funk Flex, look at Mr Cee, look at Eric B. OK, granted you're not exactly THAT kinda DJ but Sorry, its at least the same kinda feild!

You need to fuckin' deal with this shit man cuz nobodys gonna do it for you and lifes gonna fuckin' pass you by and one day you're gonna be 60 and alone, counting your fuckin' hang ups on a wall chart while everybody else, everybody else who felt anxiousness and nervy shit just like you did but did the normal logical thing and confronted that shit and got on with their lives and lived perfectly happy fulfilling lives.

No ones saying you gotta booze or smoke a fuckin' blunt or be anyone or anything that you ain't or don't wannabe but the fuckin' fact of life is that you can't swim without getting wet. Nerves, anxiety, all that kinda shit is just energy, harness that fuckin' energy and use it to fuel your personality, don't take it as like...something innate in your prompting you to recede cuz thats not what the shit is.

It don't make you a fuckin' pussy, that kinda shit. In fact quite the opposite, if you look into guys who are like that kinda Fredro Starr, Sticky Fingaz type nuts, their personalities are fueled by a lot of the same kinda shit you've described, finding places like restaurants etc or like...public places or certain types of gatherings of people and it just makes them super anxious...but their reaction to that shit is to like...just throw that energy out there and be wild and some might say uh, slightly unhinged.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you should get a black hoodie and jeans, make aggressive rap music and shoot up The Source Awards, what I'm saying is you might look at some super confident guy like wow, I'd love to be like that or some guy with a really overbearing personality and think wow, how the fuck is he like that, thats admirable, or even if it's not admirable it's impressive...but then a lot of what he goes through mentally is the same shit you do.

For crying out loud look at Mike Tyson, toughest guy in the fuckin' world, the guys bursts out in tears and weeps at the drop of a hat like a bitch when you take him certain places and push certain buttons, don't think that people don't know what you go through cuz everyone understands that shit innately and like, thats why so many people in amongst the piss-takers in this thread have been genuinely trying to help you, cuz everyone can identify with that shit on some level.

So if we're all the same like that really, more or less, give or take, then whats the problem really, when you think about it? It's all there for you to just do, you know what to do. Anxiety, so what man, fuck it, it's just a feeling, it ain't gonna kill you right? Just soldier on through that shit...for your own benefit.

[Patience 4 Axl]

I do love me some country girls.

Too bad to live in Pennsylvania.

Actually....Pennsylvania is Philadelphia....Pittsburgh....and Alabama in between.

As a native of Scranton/Wilkes-Barre and a current resident of Centre County, I can confirm this as the absolute unadulterated truth.

My cousin went to college in Scranton. I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton (that's very close to you, isn't it?) I was never referring to PA as just being Philly or Pitt. There are rural areas of the state just like there are in New York. What's your definition of "country". If you're trying to compare it to Nashville, for example, I'd say you're way off the mark.

[Lio]

Now look here sir, whats the point in all this self analysis if you ain't gonna do nothing about it? Thats sort of the purpose right you identify issues and then you deal with em, thats kinda why this and actually psychoanalysis were invented (not that this is psychoanalysis but you know what I mean, the principle behind this kinda shit is what I'm getting at. So like, OK, you discover that you're uncomfortable in restaurants, bars, well then go to those motherfuckers then man.

The point of finding this shit out isn't so you can refine your list of shit Mccoy won't do, especially if that list consists of shit that most other folk do with ease like eating in restaurants on your own or etc etc, whatever your particular things are. The point of seeking this shit out and seeking to understand oneself is with a view to self improvement, expanding your horizons, not narrowing the parameters even further.

Why you gotta take the fuckin' easy way out always man? I ain't tryna be rude but like, OK, i don't feel comfortable in restaurants on my own, so i just ain't gonna do that shit, well fuck man i don't feel comfortable going to the dentist but i don't just go, OK, thats uncomfy so i'm just gonna let my fuckin' gob go septic or whatever, fuckin' do that shit.

Like John Cassavetes said when i was a kid I purposely sought out all the places and situations in life that i found awkward and/or uncomfortable and purposely sought to put myself in those situations so you get all this anxiety and hang up shit out of your system.

It's OK to be afraid or nervous or anxious, it's a part of the human condition, we all feel it on some level but fuck man, doesn't it make you feel alive some as well? I mean seriously, if the other option is going home watching Keith Urban videos alone in your little flat in Pensylvannia is it that you're at now? then fuck man, maybe a bit of anxious type fuckin' feeling is what you need in your life right now I mean, you been spending your life avoiding that shit and cultivating your comfort zone for fuck knows how long, how far has that shit got you, ain't it time to turn the apple round and take a bite out the other end?

You're a perfectly healthy young man, all your fuckin' limbs and a good job and like, everything in the world going for ya, what the fuck have you got to be anxious and uncomfortable in your fuckin' skin over? You're a DJ, thats literally one of the coolest professions ever, look at Funk Flex, look at Mr Cee, look at Eric B. OK, granted you're not exactly THAT kinda DJ but Sorry, its at least the same kinda feild!

You need to fuckin' deal with this shit man cuz nobodys gonna do it for you and lifes gonna fuckin' pass you by and one day you're gonna be 60 and alone, counting your fuckin' hang ups on a wall chart while everybody else, everybody else who felt anxiousness and nervy shit just like you did but did the normal logical thing and confronted that shit and got on with their lives and lived perfectly happy fulfilling lives.

No ones saying you gotta booze or smoke a fuckin' blunt or be anyone or anything that you ain't or don't wannabe but the fuckin' fact of life is that you can't swim without getting wet. Nerves, anxiety, all that kinda shit is just energy, harness that fuckin' energy and use it to fuel your personality, don't take it as like...something innate in your prompting you to recede cuz thats not what the shit is.

It don't make you a fuckin' pussy, that kinda shit. In fact quite the opposite, if you look into guys who are like that kinda Fredro Starr, Sticky Fingaz type nuts, their personalities are fueled by a lot of the same kinda shit you've described, finding places like restaurants etc or like...public places or certain types of gatherings of people and it just makes them super anxious...but their reaction to that shit is to like...just throw that energy out there and be wild and some might say uh, slightly unhinged.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you should get a black hoodie and jeans, make aggressive rap music and shoot up The Source Awards, what I'm saying is you might look at some super confident guy like wow, I'd love to be like that or some guy with a really overbearing personality and think wow, how the fuck is he like that, thats admirable, or even if it's not admirable it's impressive...but then a lot of what he goes through mentally is the same shit you do.

For crying out loud look at Mike Tyson, toughest guy in the fuckin' world, the guys bursts out in tears and weeps at the drop of a hat like a bitch when you take him certain places and push certain buttons, don't think that people don't know what you go through cuz everyone understands that shit innately and like, thats why so many people in amongst the piss-takers in this thread have been genuinely trying to help you, cuz everyone can identify with that shit on some level.

So if we're all the same like that really, more or less, give or take, then whats the problem really, when you think about it? It's all there for you to just do, you know what to do. Anxiety, so what man, fuck it, it's just a feeling, it ain't gonna kill you right? Just soldier on through that shit...for your own benefit.

He knows and he's working on it.

Good post, glad I took the time to read it. Hope McCoy does too

[The Real McCoy]

I do love me some country girls.

Too bad to live in Pennsylvania.

Actually....Pennsylvania is Philadelphia....Pittsburgh....and Alabama in between.

As a native of Scranton/Wilkes-Barre and a current resident of Centre County, I can confirm this as the absolute unadulterated truth.

My cousin went to college in Scranton. I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton (that's very close to you, isn't it?) I was never referring to PA as just being Philly or Pitt. There are rural areas of the state just like there are in New York. What's your definition of "country". If you're trying to compare it to Nashville, for example, I'd say you're way off the mark.

It's definitely not Nashville (which, for the record, is my favorite place in the world aside from the beach), but there's definitely a lot of country girls out this way. Leave downtown State College and drive 5 minutes in any direction and you're in the sticks. Lots of farms, rural towns, etc.

[Apollo]

A neat excuse for what?

"There's no point asking people what's wrong with you"............well, that might be true in YOUR experiences, but not for everybody else. I gave a specific example of how it ended up being a great thing for a friend of mine. Worked out perfectly.

Seems as if some of you have dated some crazy people. You can't even have a civil conversation with them?

I'd have no problem chatting with any ex. And I'd have no problem giving an ex my thoughts on anything they wanted to ask about.

you are showering me with gifts = you are being too nice (and it looks suspicious) = it's not you, it's me

No offence, it's just how i got it. and of course im only speaking out of MY experience, which is in the end of the day is as limited as anybody else's. i thought it was obvious

on the other hand. you said you cringed every time she gave you a present. but this doesn't mean her next bf will feel the same way, right? and i would even go as far as ASSUME that MAYBE if it was some other woman showering you with gifts, then MAYBE you would actually love it and see nothing “crazy and desperate” about it. (once again, it’s not personal, it’s just a hypothesis).

As P4A said, attraction and feelings are irrational (“it’s just because”). it's like I will forgive nearly everything to one man, and to another man I won’t forgive even a broken cup.

i can see how that conversation worked out perfectly for you and your ex in a sense that you could remain friends. But im not sure she got useful information out of it

I'm positive that you would absolutely know more than me if "she got useful information out of it."

And no - you are wrong about your hypothesis. I deal with things logically, not emotionally.

Again, I think you and I have just had very very very different dating experiences. Your first sentence would lend credence to that. You see somebody being too nice as a suspicious thing? In my case, this woman was very insecure (mainly due to a recent tragedy/accident in her life) and thought she wasn't good enough to keep a man. So she thought a way to compensate was to shower her boyfriends with gifts. It had nothing to do with her feeling guilty and there was nothing suspicious about it. She thought she had to overly spoil guys to make sure they liked her.

Our "talk" was a great step for her in realizing that she didn't have to do that.

But sure. I have no doubt that you know more about how the talk went and how it ended up effecting her (and myself) than the two of us did. So thanks for that.

Now look here sir, whats the point in all this self analysis if you ain't gonna do nothing about it? Thats sort of the purpose right you identify issues and then you deal with em, thats kinda why this and actually psychoanalysis were invented (not that this is psychoanalysis but you know what I mean, the principle behind this kinda shit is what I'm getting at. So like, OK, you discover that you're uncomfortable in restaurants, bars, well then go to those motherfuckers then man.

The point of finding this shit out isn't so you can refine your list of shit Mccoy won't do, especially if that list consists of shit that most other folk do with ease like eating in restaurants on your own or etc etc, whatever your particular things are. The point of seeking this shit out and seeking to understand oneself is with a view to self improvement, expanding your horizons, not narrowing the parameters even further.

Why you gotta take the fuckin' easy way out always man? I ain't tryna be rude but like, OK, i don't feel comfortable in restaurants on my own, so i just ain't gonna do that shit, well fuck man i don't feel comfortable going to the dentist but i don't just go, OK, thats uncomfy so i'm just gonna let my fuckin' gob go septic or whatever, fuckin' do that shit.

Like John Cassavetes said when i was a kid I purposely sought out all the places and situations in life that i found awkward and/or uncomfortable and purposely sought to put myself in those situations so you get all this anxiety and hang up shit out of your system.

It's OK to be afraid or nervous or anxious, it's a part of the human condition, we all feel it on some level but fuck man, doesn't it make you feel alive some as well? I mean seriously, if the other option is going home watching Keith Urban videos alone in your little flat in Pensylvannia is it that you're at now? then fuck man, maybe a bit of anxious type fuckin' feeling is what you need in your life right now I mean, you been spending your life avoiding that shit and cultivating your comfort zone for fuck knows how long, how far has that shit got you, ain't it time to turn the apple round and take a bite out the other end?

You're a perfectly healthy young man, all your fuckin' limbs and a good job and like, everything in the world going for ya, what the fuck have you got to be anxious and uncomfortable in your fuckin' skin over? You're a DJ, thats literally one of the coolest professions ever, look at Funk Flex, look at Mr Cee, look at Eric B. OK, granted you're not exactly THAT kinda DJ but Sorry, its at least the same kinda feild!

You need to fuckin' deal with this shit man cuz nobodys gonna do it for you and lifes gonna fuckin' pass you by and one day you're gonna be 60 and alone, counting your fuckin' hang ups on a wall chart while everybody else, everybody else who felt anxiousness and nervy shit just like you did but did the normal logical thing and confronted that shit and got on with their lives and lived perfectly happy fulfilling lives.

No ones saying you gotta booze or smoke a fuckin' blunt or be anyone or anything that you ain't or don't wannabe but the fuckin' fact of life is that you can't swim without getting wet. Nerves, anxiety, all that kinda shit is just energy, harness that fuckin' energy and use it to fuel your personality, don't take it as like...something innate in your prompting you to recede cuz thats not what the shit is.

It don't make you a fuckin' pussy, that kinda shit. In fact quite the opposite, if you look into guys who are like that kinda Fredro Starr, Sticky Fingaz type nuts, their personalities are fueled by a lot of the same kinda shit you've described, finding places like restaurants etc or like...public places or certain types of gatherings of people and it just makes them super anxious...but their reaction to that shit is to like...just throw that energy out there and be wild and some might say uh, slightly unhinged.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you should get a black hoodie and jeans, make aggressive rap music and shoot up The Source Awards, what I'm saying is you might look at some super confident guy like wow, I'd love to be like that or some guy with a really overbearing personality and think wow, how the fuck is he like that, thats admirable, or even if it's not admirable it's impressive...but then a lot of what he goes through mentally is the same shit you do.

For crying out loud look at Mike Tyson, toughest guy in the fuckin' world, the guys bursts out in tears and weeps at the drop of a hat like a bitch when you take him certain places and push certain buttons, don't think that people don't know what you go through cuz everyone understands that shit innately and like, thats why so many people in amongst the piss-takers in this thread have been genuinely trying to help you, cuz everyone can identify with that shit on some level.

So if we're all the same like that really, more or less, give or take, then whats the problem really, when you think about it? It's all there for you to just do, you know what to do. Anxiety, so what man, fuck it, it's just a feeling, it ain't gonna kill you right? Just soldier on through that shit...for your own benefit.

Dr Phil is making millions while Lenny is sitting here on an Axl Rose forum? Life isn't fair.

Great post Lenny. One of the best I've ever seen on this entire forum.

[Ace Nova]

My cousin went to college in Scranton. I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton (that's very close to you, isn't it?) I was never referring to PA as just being Philly or Pitt. There are rural areas of the state just like there are in New York. What's your definition of "country". If you're trying to compare it to Nashville, for example, I'd say you're way off the mark.

Of course Nashville or the real Alabama is going to be more "country" than most of PA.....but even Scranton, Milford and Hazleton seem like a metropolis compared to some areas of the state. And yes, if you were to wake up in the middle of some of these very small towns, in the middle of nowhere.....you'd think you'd landed down south somewhere....it really is that rural....and the people act like it too.

It's different than any area I've been to in rural New York. From my personal experience, there are "country" areas of rural New York but most of the areas in rural New York seem more "hippy-ish" vs. "country".

[The Real McCoy]

My cousin went to college in Scranton. I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton (that's very close to you, isn't it?) I was never referring to PA as just being Philly or Pitt. There are rural areas of the state just like there are in New York. What's your definition of "country". If you're trying to compare it to Nashville, for example, I'd say you're way off the mark.

Of course Nashville or the real Alabama is going to be more "country" than most of PA.....but even Scranton, Milford and Hazleton seem like a metropolis compared to some areas of the state. And yes, if you were to wake up in the middle of some of these very small towns, in the middle of nowhere.....you'd think you'd landed down south somewhere....it really is that rural....and the people act like it too.

It's different than any area I've been to in rural New York. From my personal experience, there are "country" areas of rural New York but most of the areas in rural New York seem more "hippy-ish" vs. "country".

Take a ride down Rt. 45 here and you'd swear that you were warped back in time.

[NachoLZ]

My cousin went to college in Scranton. I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton (that's very close to you, isn't it?) I was never referring to PA as just being Philly or Pitt. There are rural areas of the state just like there are in New York. What's your definition of "country". If you're trying to compare it to Nashville, for example, I'd say you're way off the mark.

Of course Nashville or the real Alabama is going to be more "country" than most of PA.....but even Scranton, Milford and Hazleton seem like a metropolis compared to some areas of the state. And yes, if you were to wake up in the middle of some of these very small towns, in the middle of nowhere.....you'd think you'd landed down south somewhere....it really is that rural....and the people act like it too.

It's different than any area I've been to in rural New York. From my personal experience, there are "country" areas of rural New York but most of the areas in rural New York seem more "hippy-ish" vs. "country".

Take a ride down Rt. 45 here and you'd swear that you were warped back in time.

Please read sugaraylen's post

[The Real McCoy]

My cousin went to college in Scranton. I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton (that's very close to you, isn't it?) I was never referring to PA as just being Philly or Pitt. There are rural areas of the state just like there are in New York. What's your definition of "country". If you're trying to compare it to Nashville, for example, I'd say you're way off the mark.

Of course Nashville or the real Alabama is going to be more "country" than most of PA.....but even Scranton, Milford and Hazleton seem like a metropolis compared to some areas of the state. And yes, if you were to wake up in the middle of some of these very small towns, in the middle of nowhere.....you'd think you'd landed down south somewhere....it really is that rural....and the people act like it too.

It's different than any area I've been to in rural New York. From my personal experience, there are "country" areas of rural New York but most of the areas in rural New York seem more "hippy-ish" vs. "country".

Take a ride down Rt. 45 here and you'd swear that you were warped back in time.

Please read sugaraylen's post

I did. Pretty sure that +1'ed it as well.

[SoulMonster]

McCoy: Have you asked your 5 latest dates what went wrong? Do you intend to do it?

Here's an idea: On your next date the resident cupids at mygnr will guide your every move and word through ear plugs.

[netcat]

And no - you are wrong about your hypothesis. I deal with things logically, not emotionally.

you deal with attraction and feelings logically, not emotionally? that's uncommon. might also explain butthurt sarcasm and that lovely didactic tone

[Chris1989]

Who the fuck is Keith Urban?

[Guest Len B'stard]

Who the fuck is Keith Urban?

Some twat who presented Pop Idol or something. The fact that you don't know who he is reflects very well on your taste in music, well done sir!

[The Real McCoy]

Who the fuck is Keith Urban?

Country singer.

[Dazey]

Who the fuck is Keith Urban?

Nicole Kidman's wife.

[Guest Len B'stard]

Ain't she going out with nobhead out of Coldplay?

[Tater Totts]

No that was Gwyneth Paltrow but they're getting divorced.

[Guest Len B'stard]

Are they really? A-haha, whats the matter, couldn't work out who was the bitch in the bedroom?

[AxlisOld]

I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton

I've done a few overnight stays in Hazelton, but not since this happened there ...

http://www.timesleader.com/news/local-news/997394/Police:-Man-high-on-Molly-raped-sodomized-girlfriend

"Prior to her surgery, the victim told police that she and Paulino were going to engage in consensual sex, when Paulino “freaked out,” grabbed her by the neck and started choking her. While still choking her, he inserted his fist into her anus. She indicated she was screaming through the assault and told Paulino to “get out,” but the attack did not stop until one of her minor children walked into the bedroom after the child heard her screaming, court papers state.

In an interview with police, Paulino said he put his hand inside the victim “and pulled something out. I pulled out something sticky that stuck to my hand,” according to court papers."

While walking to Dixon's courtroom, Paulino indicated he wasn't worried because he has Jesus on his side.

Good luck with that defense.

[The Real McCoy]

I have relatives in Milford and Hazelton

I've done a few overnight stays in Hazelton, but not since this happened there ...

http://www.timesleader.com/news/local-news/997394/Police:-Man-high-on-Molly-raped-sodomized-girlfriend

"Prior to her surgery, the victim told police that she and Paulino were going to engage in consensual sex, when Paulino freaked out, grabbed her by the neck and started choking her. While still choking her, he inserted his fist into her anus. She indicated she was screaming through the assault and told Paulino to get out, but the attack did not stop until one of her minor children walked into the bedroom after the child heard her screaming, court papers state.

In an interview with police, Paulino said he put his hand inside the victim and pulled something out. I pulled out something sticky that stuck to my hand, according to court papers."

That city has gone to hell over the last few years.

[SoulMonster]

McCoy: Have you asked your 5 latest dates what went wrong? Do you intend to do it?

[The Real McCoy]

McCoy: Have you asked your 5 latest dates what went wrong? Do you intend to do it?

I don't even think that I've dated 5 different girls in the past year.

[SoulMonster]

Adjust the number to reality.

[The Real McCoy]

I apparently have a date on Thursday.

[Dazey]

I apparently have a date on Thursday.

We all do. It's the 28th.

Edited May 27, 2014 by Dazey