Len Cnut Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 (edited) I'm with Soulmonster.Weddings don't need to be big expensive extravagant events. It's basically all about ego and "look at me, look at me, look at me."They are supposed to be an event to celebrate the joining of matrimony between two people. Not something for girls to use as bragging methods over their friends. It's not about getting 1,000 perfect pictures, serving lobster, having the most expensive dress - it's about celebrating the love that two people have and are committing to each other.A wedding is about two people being in love. Not about how big and fancy we can make the party.My buddy got married a couple years ago. The bride's dad gave them a $20,000 budget and said "you keep whatever isn't spent on the wedding, that's your present." They got married at the court-house, had a reception for all their family and friends. Then used the other $19 grand to spend a month in Europe on vacation and put a down payment on a house.Why does the only justification have to be ego or bragging? I mean I'm sure it is with a great many but all that really illustrates is the fact that we all belong to a broadly similar social strata, to get married in some wonderful ancient Cathedral or something thats asthetically pleasing, you could be an art and architecture nut, or like...super expensive classy dresses, perhaps people just think they're beautiful? And all those people that go 'but you can get the same thing for £80!', no you cant, there's a reason why expensive things are expensive and certain designers get paid like they do, Princess Dianas actual dress and a facsimile some bird from Essex made of it in the mid 80s are not the same thing. Theres a difference between a real Breitling and some fake knocked up in China you can get for the price of a tin of beans.If you cant afford it then nothings a good idea but if you can then why not, dont necessarily mean you're some egotistical person just out to brag, thats the same silly line of reasoning that dictates that anybody who buys an expensive car or a racing car is necessarily doing it cuz they're a show off, or looking at a painting in the Tate gallery by Cezanne and going 'well i wouldnt pay a million pounds for that shite!'. And not all girls are snotty bragging bitches, some people just have had this idea, this dream in their head that they want to realise.I dont understand this dim view that people seem to take towards the romantic or the aesthetic. They dont 'need' to be that way but if everything we did was based on need then the world would be a boring place. Edited October 15, 2015 by Len B'stard 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apollo Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 (edited) I'm with Soulmonster.Weddings don't need to be big expensive extravagant events. It's basically all about ego and "look at me, look at me, look at me."They are supposed to be an event to celebrate the joining of matrimony between two people. Not something for girls to use as bragging methods over their friends. It's not about getting 1,000 perfect pictures, serving lobster, having the most expensive dress - it's about celebrating the love that two people have and are committing to each other.A wedding is about two people being in love. Not about how big and fancy we can make the party.My buddy got married a couple years ago. The bride's dad gave them a $20,000 budget and said "you keep whatever isn't spent on the wedding, that's your present." They got married at the court-house, had a reception for all their family and friends. Then used the other $19 grand to spend a month in Europe on vacation and put a down payment on a house.Why does the only justification have to be ego or bragging? I mean I'm sure it is with a great many but all that really illustrates is the fact that we all belong to a broadly similar social strata, to get married in some wonderful ancient Cathedral or something thats asthetically pleasing, you could be an art and architecture nut, or like...super expensive classy dresses, perhaps people just think they're beautiful?If you cant afford it then nothings a good idea but if you can then why not, dont necessarily mean you're some egotistical person just out to brag, thats the same silly line of reasoning that dictates that anybody who buys an expensive car or a racing car is necessarily doing it cuz they're a show off, or looking at a painting in the Tate gallery by Cezanne and going 'well i wouldnt pay a million pounds for that shite!'.I dont understand this dim view that people seem to take towards the romantic or the aesthetic.I suppose the easy answer is in your post. Because we disagree, it's because I'm "dim" and have "silly lines of reasoning."Or, that I wasn't writing an essay or piece for publication in a scientific journal. It was a quick comment on a Guns n Roses forum.Or, it could be that my post was just generally addressing the topic and didn't actually mean that 100% of people fall into what I was saying. I suppose I could have wrote a six page respond, breaking down everybody possible reason that people have large weddings.It's kind of like when people have a bad driving experience. Maybe somebody cut them off in traffic really bad. And they say "Uggg, can't anybody drive anymore?"They don't literally mean that they think 100% of the world can't drive. Or if you get bad customer service and make a comment about how people aren't as polite as they use to be - you aren't saying that 100% of people in the customer service field are bad. Edited October 15, 2015 by Apollo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 (edited) Yes but what you are outlining here is a prevalent attitude and perspective among lots of people, generally in the world and on this forum too so i was providing a counterpoint, not claiming that your comments were indicative of an all encompassing viewpoint. Where did you feel that i was claiming your opinion to be so total and all encompassing?Also i didnt call you dim i said i didnt understand this dim view that people take towards the asthetic or romantic, the phrase 'to take a dim view' on something means to disapprove of it, not that you're stupid.http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/take+a+dim+view Edited October 15, 2015 by Len B'stard 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gracii Guns Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 Unless you're getting married for publicity reasons (hello Katie Price) weddings may seem like go trips, but they're not.Some people just like weddings. It's their thing. Other people don't...and that's ok. It's a hobby. Marriage is the biggest ego trip anyone can take anyway, whether your wedding's fancy or not. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AxlisOld Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 Even if you aren't having the big extravagant wedding, you're still decorating and hosting dinner and drinks for 50+ people. That ain't cheap. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alfierose Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 I think the law was changed at some point to allow all kinds of venues to hold weddings. This seems to be when the cost rose, the price of convenience I suppose, I went to a wedding a couple of weeks ago in a beautiful stately home type place. It was set up purely for weddings, rooms to stay overnight, a woodland ceremony area, outdoor seating, marquee restaurant and bar - it was the most beautiful wedding I've attended but it also cost around 20k as far as I know.Fifteen or so years ago when I got hitched the all in one type places still weren't that mainstream( up north anyway) and most people still did the church/registry office followed by busing people to a club house or church hall for a buffet. It didn't cost very much, maybe about 5k including honeymoon. With the internet in it's infancy it never occurred to me that there might be a vast array of options out there. If I was doing it now I'm fairly sure I would easily find ways to spend a lot more. Like with anything being able to research online has broadened our horizons so much but it comes at a consumerist cost.People tend to get married on average a lot older now and foot the majority of the bill themselves. The couple from a few weeks back were both late thirties with good jobs and already owned a home. In that sort of scenario it's not a big deal for them to spend whatever they want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alfierose Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon> 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 (edited) What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. Edited October 15, 2015 by Dazey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alfierose Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. In my defence my memories of these things are mostly from the point of view of being one of the hyped up, cola addled children. You got to stay up really late too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. In my defence my memories of these things are mostly from the point of view of being one of the hyped up, cola addled children. You got to stay up really late too!To be fair I loved working there and one time I witnessed the stewardess knock some wanker clean out cos he'd been knocking his missus about in the lounge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alfierose Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. In my defence my memories of these things are mostly from the point of view of being one of the hyped up, cola addled children. You got to stay up really late too!To be fair I loved working there and one time I witnessed the stewardess knock some wanker clean out cos he'd been knocking his missus about in the lounge. I used to work at a similar place aged 13 doing table service for events. All the waitressing girls once had to stand outside in the pissing rain for an hour whilst Bernard Manning did an act. edit; we could still hear! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. In my defence my memories of these things are mostly from the point of view of being one of the hyped up, cola addled children. You got to stay up really late too!To be fair I loved working there and one time I witnessed the stewardess knock some wanker clean out cos he'd been knocking his missus about in the lounge. I used to work at a similar place aged 13 doing table service for events. All the waitressing girls once had to stand outside in the pissing rain for an hour whilst Bernard Manning did an act. edit; we could still hear!The first night the place I worked in served Stella (at £1.35 a pint ) 5 people ended up in A&E. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alfierose Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. In my defence my memories of these things are mostly from the point of view of being one of the hyped up, cola addled children. You got to stay up really late too!To be fair I loved working there and one time I witnessed the stewardess knock some wanker clean out cos he'd been knocking his missus about in the lounge. I used to work at a similar place aged 13 doing table service for events. All the waitressing girls once had to stand outside in the pissing rain for an hour whilst Bernard Manning did an act. edit; we could still hear!The first night the place I worked in served Stella (at £1.35 a pint ) 5 people ended up in A&E. Sounds about right! On another occasion some old famous footballer who was guesting felt my bum. In light of all the recent harassment cases it's occurred to me I could sue if I were so inclined. At the time it seemed fairly accepted that this would happen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. In my defence my memories of these things are mostly from the point of view of being one of the hyped up, cola addled children. You got to stay up really late too!To be fair I loved working there and one time I witnessed the stewardess knock some wanker clean out cos he'd been knocking his missus about in the lounge. I used to work at a similar place aged 13 doing table service for events. All the waitressing girls once had to stand outside in the pissing rain for an hour whilst Bernard Manning did an act. edit; we could still hear!The first night the place I worked in served Stella (at £1.35 a pint ) 5 people ended up in A&E. Sounds about right! On another occasion some old famous footballer who was guesting felt my bum. In light of all the recent harassment cases it's occurred to me I could sue if I were so inclined. At the time it seemed fairly accepted that this would happen.The saddest thing was always when we'd shut the bar at 3:30pm but let people stay in the club. The usual suspects would always order 5 pints of Magnet and they'd still be sitting there nursing half a pint of flat beer when I'd reopen the bar again at 7pm. Sad. Really sad. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alfierose Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>While all the alcoholics give the missus a good kicking round the back of the concert room? Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs. In my defence my memories of these things are mostly from the point of view of being one of the hyped up, cola addled children. You got to stay up really late too!To be fair I loved working there and one time I witnessed the stewardess knock some wanker clean out cos he'd been knocking his missus about in the lounge. I used to work at a similar place aged 13 doing table service for events. All the waitressing girls once had to stand outside in the pissing rain for an hour whilst Bernard Manning did an act. edit; we could still hear!The first night the place I worked in served Stella (at £1.35 a pint ) 5 people ended up in A&E. Sounds about right! On another occasion some old famous footballer who was guesting felt my bum. In light of all the recent harassment cases it's occurred to me I could sue if I were so inclined. At the time it seemed fairly accepted that this would happen.The saddest thing was always when we'd shut the bar at 3:30pm but let people stay in the club. The usual suspects would always order 5 pints of Magnet and they'd still be sitting there nursing half a pint of flat beer when I'd reopen the bar again at 7pm. Sad. Really sad.Reminds me of an old Irish pub I used to frequent as a student, it had the weirdest mix of clientele which consisted of the less diligent students from the tech across the road who were skipping class (me) and a regular posse of the (seemingly) 100 year old town alcoholics (it was next to the bus station). I met some serious characters in that pub - I can't imagine my kids generation ever doing that sort of thing, they are all in Revolutions or Wetherspoons. It helped that my course tutor was also fond of this pub, by the second year all classes were held in this pub and any notion of following a proper syllabus went right out of the window. We pretty much all failed that A Level, even the kids who started out with good intentions!Can you guess what A level it was.....that's right...Sociology Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bono Posted October 15, 2015 Share Posted October 15, 2015 Weddings don't need to be big expensive extravagant events. It's basically all about ego and "look at me, look at me, look at me."They are supposed to be an event to celebrate the joining of matrimony between two people. Not something for girls to use as bragging methods over their friends. It's not about getting 1,000 perfect pictures, serving lobster, having the most expensive dress - it's about celebrating the love that two people have and are committing to each other.A wedding is about two people being in love. Not about how big and fancy we can make the party.My buddy got married a couple years ago. The bride's dad gave them a $20,000 budget and said "you keep whatever isn't spent on the wedding, that's your present." They got married at the court-house, had a reception for all their family and friends. Then used the other $19 grand to spend a month in Europe on vacation and put a down payment on a house.Why does a "great wedding" have to be equal to an "expensive wedding"? Girls are being tricked and fooled and humbugged by the wedding industry into paying out their fucking noses at a time in life when they typically don't have that kinda money to fullfil a fantasy that was inoculated in their brains in the first by an cynical industry. It's ridiculous. You don't need all that stuff and spend all that money to have a great and memorable ceremony celebrating the decision to be with someone for the rest of your life. Allow yourself to be creative, think differently, and most of all to put the love before fullfilling assumed material wedding obligations and requirements.The best wedding I ever went to was out on an acreage. People half dressed up. Kinda more like a night at a fancy club than a wedding. People brought thir own alcohol The food was burgers, hot dogs, potato salad and all the stuff you'd expect at a BBQ. They had music and the Stanley Cup was playing on a projector screen outside. It was so casual and so genuine and so real and so fun. Best wedding ever. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apollo Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 What I do think is sad is how many weddings these days are child free. I understand why, if your paying upwards of £70 per head you're going to be choosy but there does seem to be a prevailing attitude that children will somehow ruin the day. Consequently though a lot of kids grow up never experiencing these milestone occasions (or the etiquette of them). I am a bit wistful for the old working men club community style weddings with a load of kids playing hide and seek, sitting under tables with pop and crisps. <old gimmer emoticon>Sorry, I spent my student days behind the bar in working men's clubs.The glory hole was at the bar and not in one of the back rooms? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spunko12345 Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 I'm going to a wedding this weekend. My missus isn't going so I'm going up with a hip flask full of whisky and a hundred quid to spunk.They've thoughtfully a ranged for a big screen to show the rugby in the afternoon. I was gonna just drive back in the evening and not drink but as the day got closer I thought fuck that so I'm gonna sleep in my car. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazey Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 I'm going to a wedding this weekend. My missus isn't going so I'm going up with a hip flask full of whisky and a hundred quid to spunk.They've thoughtfully a ranged for a big screen to show the rugby in the afternoon. I was gonna just drive back in the evening and not drink but as the day got closer I thought fuck that so I'm gonna sleep in my car.Get a hotel for the night you stingy Taff twat! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len Cnut Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 I'm going to a wedding this weekend. My missus isn't going so I'm going up with a hip flask full of whisky and a hundred quid to spunk.They've thoughtfully a ranged for a big screen to show the rugby in the afternoon. I was gonna just drive back in the evening and not drink but as the day got closer I thought fuck that so I'm gonna sleep in my car.Make sure you park it proper, if filth see you in the back you'll get breathalysed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
streak Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Don't sleep in your car after a session, you will get fucked for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axls Rocket Queen Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 The last wedding I went to was kind of weird, for one thing they did the speeches throughout dinner so the whole thing felt really awkward and interrupted. A couple of our friends had their speeches before dinner which I think we're going to do, then everyone can relax for the rest of the evening. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoulMonster Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 The last wedding I went to was kind of weird, for one thing they did the speeches throughout dinner so the whole thing felt really awkward and interrupted.That's the common way of doing it over here. I am at the age where I av thru with weddings; most of my friends have done it or decided not to do it. I ended up being best man twice and toast master once. So yeah, I know a lot about wedding speeches Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spunko12345 Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Don't sleep in your car after a session, you will get fucked for it.It's ok it will be parked on private grounds on this country estate place where they're having the wedding. I'm more than likely sharing a b&b now anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gracii Guns Posted October 16, 2015 Share Posted October 16, 2015 Since we're all sharing stories... The last wedding I went to, the groom apologised for staring at my cleavage.Top wedding though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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