The whining thread

[Fitha_whiskey]

16 minutes ago, Gibson_Guy87 said:

It's hot as fuck, even for Iowa. It hit 91 degrees today and now at 9PM it's still 83 degrees. Worst part is I don't have central air and my A/C unit doesn't do all that much either. 

Is it humid up there? Cuz here in KS, that makes all the difference. Humid as fuck today here...

[Gibson87]

1 hour ago, Fitha_whiskey said:

Is it humid up there? Cuz here in KS, that makes all the difference. Humid as fuck today here...

Thankfully no, but it's the same up here when it gets humid. I can stand the heat but the humidity is just terrible if the temp gets over 90

[wasted]

You know when people treat you badly? 

Well, you know me...

Fuck them! 

I guess a post in time might mean more to some than others? 

Get a fucking lawyer. A defense lawyer maybe, someone who can talk and chew gum at the same time at least? 

 

 

[Gracii Guns]

Does everyone go through stages in life where they don't have goals and nothing really excites them any more? Is that normal? I'm not talking about those who have mental illnesses, where those are common symptoms. But for the healthy folks who are plodding along, trying to make ends meet, possibly get one foreign holiday a year? 

Last Christmas an old friend asked me "what are your dreams?" and I was like "I dunno… meh…". 

Is it important to have goals in adult life, or is that just for people who are young and don't pay rent? I suppose I have everything I need in life. But no desire to better myself nor the capability to do much for the world around me. Not very much inspires me, and I wish it did.

[rubbermade_baby]

On 04/06/2017 at 7:44 PM, Gracii Guns said:

Does everyone go through stages in life where they don't have goals and nothing really excites them any more? Is that normal? I'm not talking about those who have mental illnesses, where those are common symptoms. But for the healthy folks who are plodding along, trying to make ends meet, possibly get one foreign holiday a year? 

Last Christmas an old friend asked me "what are your dreams?" and I was like "I dunno… meh…". 

Is it important to have goals in adult life, or is that just for people who are young and don't pay rent? I suppose I have everything I need in life. But no desire to better myself nor the capability to do much for the world around me. Not very much inspires me, and I wish it did.

I think it's normal to have moments like this in life. I think possibly it may even be a good sign that you are content with your life as it is just now. 

 

I came along to whine about my lack of adult conversation 

[Gibson87]

My boss is really pissing me off. She said that if I want more hours I need to change my availability a little and asked if I was able to. I said maybe. She fucking schedules me outside of when I'm available and I didn't even change when I'm available at all

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

4 minutes ago, Gibson_Guy87 said:

My boss is really pissing me off. She said that if I want more hours I need to change my availability a little and asked if I was able to. I said maybe. She fucking schedules me outside of when I'm available and I didn't even change when I'm available at all

that SUCKS! my old boss would try to call me into work and i'd either let the phone ring (yay caller ID ) or screen her calls. she could accuse me of dodging but had no PROOF. and at the time i worked Sundays and she never could find anyone willing to do my job on Sundays.

 

[Gibson87]

2 minutes ago, AxlsFavoriteRose said:

that SUCKS! my old boss would try to call me into work and i'd either let the phone ring (yay caller ID ) or screen her calls. she could accuse me of dodging but had no PROOF. and at the time i worked Sundays and she never could find anyone willing to do my job on Sundays.

 

Yeah mine is pretty similar to that. I'll get called out for not wanting to come in on my off days.

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

i have had this stupid laptop THREE months and it is already messing up. it just DIED on me mid convo with a friend and i know he thinks i just left him hanging 

[soon]

Short version:  

Hired help for garden.  They had a complete breakdown and it was scary and bewildering. They are clearly unwell but anger was focused at me because of my disability. They were just really off and clearly didnt want to work and when finally did they worked one minute and threw down tool and yelled at neighbouring gardener for no reason and then took off.  

 

Long Version (that why would any one read?  but I wrote anyways) :

I hired a landscaper to help me establish my most difficult large garden for the season.  Id hired them last year to put it to bed for winter and they were pleasant, even though lazy.

So i hired them.  Made plan for them to come pick me up with all the tools and such.  They charge a premium rate to say the least.

First, I had to contact them to discover they'd be at least an hour late.  No apology.  Then they didnt send me up dates and were much later.  Then finally arrived and was acting like they'd hired me and I was running late.

Then they drove to a mcdonalds, which I assumed was for toilet.  Nope.  And as they left car they joked "dont steal my car, haha" but then paused and decided to actually take their keys.  Then ten minutes later they come out with the bag and drink and left over fries, having sat down to eat their burger.  No comment given.  But random complaints about how tax dollars are spent squeeze through the fists full of french fries perpetually refilled into their mouth.

Okay, this is some of the set up all this weird power dynamic continues.

On route, Ive already decided to never hire them again, and they keep saying "next time Ill leave you at home and garden myself."  No idea why this was said.  

Then on highway they start complaining about "a rogue school bus tailgating us!"  The reason I hired help is due to health reason that, in part, prevents me from pivoting head.  So Im thinking that theres a bus tailgating us.  They fidget constantly with power windows and radio volume.  Repeating some of the stuff above and other non sequetres.

Once off high way, a few more mentions of rogue school bus.  It becomes clear to me that there is no rogue bus.

This is the moment.  My hand tightens on grip.  gulp.  trying to smile and stay calm.

They swerved on road as they looked in disgust at all the passing yards "thats a disgusting garden" foaming at the mouth.  All the while keeping an eye on "rogue school bus" in rear view mirror (not actually there remember).

So they saw too late some larger road kill.  Swerved in theory to miss it but drove my side right over its hardened body.  Must have been disgusting to see, it was a real bump.  This hurt me a lot.  So i laugh - just trying to break tension or because of tension - and they got really weird that I laughed.

We arrive and they then announce they didnt bring wheel barrel I'd requested.  So much of the job I hired them for couldn't be done.  They were mad at me from the outset regarding the absence of wheel barrel.  Then they opted not to bring tools but to go asses.  I tell them the tools needed. But remember: they're in charge in their mind.  Its becoming clearer and clearer that they are in charge because I am disabled and also because they cant separate physical disability from cognitive.  And this is the laziness i remembered as well.  Okay so walk to the plot.  Theyre grumbling that Im leading us the wrong way to my own garden.  Its the shortest route, its the only route and I have mobility issues.  Again why they were hired.

We get there they complain about why didnt we park at the much further away parking lot.  And "its so wet."  Well yes, its been raining as they well know but it was workable and there were many out working that day. Also they told me they were late because of earlier gardening gig ran long, so that would be just as wet. So they huff and grumble as they go to get the tools.  Then decided to move car to other lot and I see them needlessly forcing people to move cars - all of whom later expressed fear about that interaction.  Again I have mobility issues and this extra distance didnt make sense regardless.  This took 20 more minutes.

Then they stand looking at a field of weeds and ask what we should do.  This has been gone over and over in planning.  "Hmmm, maybe lets start with weeding" I say.  In response to me daring to give direction even when asked for it, they, start critiquing the soil - which they haven't touched and is covered in weeds - saying "you've done the soil all wrong, nothing will grow here.'"  I believe this was said just to hurt feelings.  And for the record we had a bumper crop of everything in that garden last season.  I eat from that garden everyday, including today.

I just stop interacting and ask if we can get started.  They worked for one minute. Im not kidding: one minute.  I stopped to hydrate.  I had a medical test that required lots of hydration, not that I need an excuse in the least (and there was that whole mcdonalds break thing too, so... And also, they said they didnt even want me there with them in the first place).  At the sight of my siting to drink water instead of working, they threw shovel down, yelling "I may work, but I dont work like a dog!" and randomly yelled at a neighbour, aggressively pointing and for some reason asking me "is this your friend, is this your friend?!?!".  Then said they were leaving and insisted I go with them.  I declined repeatedly. They said I was to sick to stay.  I remind them Im an adult and know about my condition much better then they do.  But they continue on treating me like a child.  Then they tried to make plans to reschelde and I said no thanks to which they said "ill weed it even if you dont tell me too."  And this was my favourite: "i wont even charge you for today."  I wouldn't even know what what toxic disablism, endangerment in a vehicle and one minute of shovelling is going for in todays market, haha! Then my neighbour came to my aid, seeing this person wound up and pacing around me.  So they started yelling at that neighbour.  These are big plots so neighbours are far away.  But this neighbour came right over and stood beside me.

Then the hired help took off and i was left standing in a field with a non english speaking neighbour.  We just scratch our heads and didnt even try to communicate we just stood near each other for sometime, smiled and parted ways eventually after shock wore off.

Theres so much more to this, all the tip bits of bonkers.  Im still not sure if I should contact them to clarify to definitely not do any work like they threatened to?

Just had to write this to process.  I cant believe this is a true story.  I felt like I was in a Christoper Guest film about disablists.

Was supposed to be a pleasant day of gardening.

 

[janrichmond]

@soon What a nasty bit of work he was. Now he has gone you can just chill, have a drink and start thinking about plan B. Maybe get someone through a recommendation . Sorry for your fuck up of a day he sounds like a right cunt

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

2 hours ago, soon said:

Short version:  

Hired help for garden.  They had a complete breakdown and it was scary and bewildering. They are clearly unwell but anger was focused at me because of my disability. They were just really off and clearly didnt want to work and when finally did they worked one minute and threw down tool and yelled at neighbouring gardener for no reason and then took off.  

 

Long Version (that why would any one read?  but I wrote anyways) :

I hired a landscaper to help me establish my most difficult large garden for the season.  Id hired them last year to put it to bed for winter and they were pleasant, even though lazy.

So i hired them.  Made plan for them to come pick me up with all the tools and such.  They charge a premium rate to say the least.

First, I had to contact them to discover they'd be at least an hour late.  No apology.  Then they didnt send me up dates and were much later.  Then finally arrived and was acting like they'd hired me and I was running late.

Then they drove to a mcdonalds, which I assumed was for toilet.  Nope.  And as they left car they joked "dont steal my car, haha" but then paused and decided to actually take their keys.  Then ten minutes later they come out with the bag and drink and left over fries, having sat down to eat their burger.  No comment given.  But random complaints about how tax dollars are spent squeeze through the fists full of french fries perpetually refilled into their mouth.

Okay, this is some of the set up all this weird power dynamic continues.

On route, Ive already decided to never hire them again, and they keep saying "next time Ill leave you at home and garden myself."  No idea why this was said.  

Then on highway they start complaining about "a rogue school bus tailgating us!"  The reason I hired help is due to health reason that, in part, prevents me from pivoting head.  So Im thinking that theres a bus tailgating us.  They fidget constantly with power windows and radio volume.  Repeating some of the stuff above and other non sequetres.

Once off high way, a few more mentions of rogue school bus.  It becomes clear to me that there is no rogue bus.

This is the moment.  My hand tightens on grip.  gulp.  trying to smile and stay calm.

They swerved on road as they looked in disgust at all the passing yards "thats a disgusting garden" foaming at the mouth.  All the while keeping an eye on "rogue school bus" in rear view mirror (not actually there remember).

So they saw too late some larger road kill.  Swerved in theory to miss it but drove my side right over its hardened body.  Must have been disgusting to see, it was a real bump.  This hurt me a lot.  So i laugh - just trying to break tension or because of tension - and they got really weird that I laughed.

We arrive and they then announce they didnt bring wheel barrel I'd requested.  So much of the job I hired them for couldn't be done.  They were mad at me from the outset regarding the absence of wheel barrel.  Then they opted not to bring tools but to go asses.  I tell them the tools needed. But remember: they're in charge in their mind.  Its becoming clearer and clearer that they are in charge because I am disabled and also because they cant separate physical disability from cognitive.  And this is the laziness i remembered as well.  Okay so walk to the plot.  Theyre grumbling that Im leading us the wrong way to my own garden.  Its the shortest route, its the only route and I have mobility issues.  Again why they were hired.

We get there they complain about why didnt we park at the much further away parking lot.  And "its so wet."  Well yes, its been raining as they well know but it was workable and there were many out working that day. Also they told me they were late because of earlier gardening gig ran long, so that would be just as wet. So they huff and grumble as they go to get the tools.  Then decided to move car to other lot and I see them needlessly forcing people to move cars - all of whom later expressed fear about that interaction.  Again I have mobility issues and this extra distance didnt make sense regardless.  This took 20 more minutes.

Then they stand looking at a field of weeds and ask what we should do.  This has been gone over and over in planning.  "Hmmm, maybe lets start with weeding" I say.  In response to me daring to give direction even when asked for it, they, start critiquing the soil - which they haven't touched and is covered in weeds - saying "you've done the soil all wrong, nothing will grow here.'"  I believe this was said just to hurt feelings.  And for the record we had a bumper crop of everything in that garden last season.  I eat from that garden everyday, including today.

I just stop interacting and ask if we can get started.  They worked for one minute. Im not kidding: one minute.  I stopped to hydrate.  I had a medical test that required lots of hydration, not that I need an excuse in the least (and there was that whole mcdonalds break thing too, so... And also, they said they didnt even want me there with them in the first place).  At the sight of my siting to drink water instead of working, they threw shovel down, yelling "I may work, but I dont work like a dog!" and randomly yelled at a neighbour, aggressively pointing and for some reason asking me "is this your friend, is this your friend?!?!".  Then said they were leaving and insisted I go with them.  I declined repeatedly. They said I was to sick to stay.  I remind them Im an adult and know about my condition much better then they do.  But they continue on treating me like a child.  Then they tried to make plans to reschelde and I said no thanks to which they said "ill weed it even if you dont tell me too."  And this was my favourite: "i wont even charge you for today."  I wouldn't even know what what toxic disablism, endangerment in a vehicle and one minute of shovelling is going for in todays market, haha! Then my neighbour came to my aid, seeing this person wound up and pacing around me.  So they started yelling at that neighbour.  These are big plots so neighbours are far away.  But this neighbour came right over and stood beside me.

Then the hired help took off and i was left standing in a field with a non english speaking neighbour.  We just scratch our heads and didnt even try to communicate we just stood near each other for sometime, smiled and parted ways eventually after shock wore off.

Theres so much more to this, all the tip bits of bonkers.  Im still not sure if I should contact them to clarify to definitely not do any work like they threatened to?

Just had to write this to process.  I cant believe this is a true story.  I felt like I was in a Christoper Guest film about disablists.

Was supposed to be a pleasant day of gardening.

 

is there some way you can turn them in to like the BBB ( don't know if you have that there? )

so sorry this happened sweetie. *hugs*

[rocknroll41]

has anybody put "i hate my job" yet for this thread?

[soon]

53 minutes ago, janrichmond said:

@soon What a nasty bit of work he was. Now he has gone you can just chill, have a drink and start thinking about plan B. Maybe get someone through a recommendation . Sorry for your fuck up of a day he sounds like a right cunt

It sounds like male bullshit, but it was actually a women.  Both because my body is very vulnerable and because she's an imposing build it was still a real danger for me.  

Thanks for the hugs.  It is rattling to think one could be injured intentionally by someone as some sort of retribution just for having already been injured previously. 

And the worst is they did come recommended.  I was hoping to save money so contacted university prof of agriculture to see if I could get an intern.  That was against ethics but he highly recommended this person.

You are right, just need to chill and make plan B.  Its supposed to be a happy place.  Im taking a day or two and then back at it!

45 minutes ago, AxlsFavoriteRose said:

is there some way you can turn them in to like the BBB ( don't know if you have that there? )

so sorry this happened sweetie. *hugs*

That hadn't crossed my mind yet.  We do.  And you are right, I really should file a complaint.  I will.

Thanks for hugs.  This was miserable and disorienting.

[Jane M.]

1 hour ago, rocknroll41 said:

has anybody put "i hate my job" yet for this thread?

I hate mine but I try not complain 'cause as long as I can pay my bills on time and have a peace of mind I'm cool. 

@soon hugs to you. Damn you had a shitty day. 

[soon]

26 minutes ago, Jane M. said:

I hate mine but I try not complain 'cause as long as I can pay my bills on time and have a peace of mind I'm cool. 

@soon hugs to you. Damn you had a shitty day. 

Thank you.  Much appreciated. 

[soon]

14 minutes ago, Oldest Goat said:

"The soil is all wrong!" You mean this fucking soil ya cunt?! *throws it in her eyes*

@soon Seriously, I feel like helping you with your garden now tbh, mate. What a horrible experience. They sound literally insane and/or on meth.

ha, I wouldn't have minded a method of defence.  

I wish you could give me a hand!  The sentiment goes a long way too.  Its something else how fast everything can change and one discovers piece by piece that 'you cant do this anymore, you cant do that anymore'  and much of it one could still do if people weren't so divided and misinformed.  So thank you for saying so

It really was horrible.  And Im finding it hard to shake off

I was wondering about meth.  This was just next level with the aggression.  Something about it seems inorganic (gardening pun not intended)

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

5 hours ago, janrichmond said:

@soon What a nasty bit of work he was. Now he has gone you can just chill, have a drink and start thinking about plan B. Maybe get someone through a recommendation . Sorry for your fuck up of a day he sounds like a right cunt

@soon you know Jan and i have your back sweetie!! 

[soon]

13 hours ago, AxlsFavoriteRose said:

@soon you know Jan and i have your back sweetie!! 

Before I didnt know I needed muscle to defend me whilst gardening, but in a world where I do Im so glad its the two of you!

[wasted]

There's something about the moment that an obvious troll  caves and there's a certain sentimental value to it. A sadness to it even though you knew the day would come. What happens when you die? Maybe your temporal energy...just get me a red bull. 

[john lennon]

I'm pissed off and I feel I don't belong anywhere. 

[Zoot]

So I upgraded final cut pro on accident, can't find anything now and I have to have this video edited by 5pm today.

I'm sure I'll figure it out but I needed to whine for a brief second.

[soon]

13 hours ago, john lennon said:

I'm pissed off and I feel I don't belong anywhere. 

Thats a terrible feeling.  Sorry to hear that.

[AxlsFavoriteRose]

14 hours ago, john lennon said:

I'm pissed off and I feel I don't belong anywhere. 

wow do i know that feeling! sorry you are going through it cos it effing SUCKS!

[BlueJean Baby]

Well shit....switched our phone and WiFi over to Comcast Xfinity 3 weeks ago to get a bundle deal with our cable tv...now all three are out since 3 pm today.  I hate silence ?